I broke up with my lover after when my husband who was a nasty person decided to become nice again. But now, he has reverted to his old self and i find myelf missing my lover. Today is his birthday and i have been thinking whether i should call or send a message to him to wish him Happy birthday. Am i wrong in feeling this way? He has not called me ever since we broke up. Actually, he was the one who stopped calling me first but when i ask should we break up, he said that he never said he wanted to break up with me but he is busy and will call when the time is right. What does that mean? What should i do?
2006-10-24 02:24:22 · 14 answers · asked by angelheart 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You have several problems going on here. So let's address them seperately.
Your husband is the first problem. Why do you stay with him? It is obvious that you don't love him or else you wouldn't need a lover. I am not judging you at all, in fact I have been there. But if you are cheating that means that you are not happy in your marriage and you are searching for something else. So if your husband doesn't make you happy, then please leave.
Your lover is the next problem. If you have noticed that he suddenly becomes busy and says he will call when the time is right then he may have found someone else. You are better off leaving him alone as it seems that is what he wants. He left is as he will call so that he can keep you hanging just in case he wants to see you again.
You need to think about what is best for you and I don't think it is either man! Take time to think and you will know what needs done.
2006-10-24 02:35:41 · answer #1 · answered by Tara S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your troubles...but you need to get a divorce..I know you have heard the old saying that a zebra never changes its stripes...Well your husband isn't going to either...He may try and make an effort but only until he is comfortable again with having control over you again....as far as your lover is concerned he probably sensed what was about to happen and decided to take matters into his own hands and at least get out with a little dignity...while trying to protect himself...go ahead and try and contact him today to wish him Happy Birthday but I don't think that he will be returning until you make a decision concerning yourself....Do I stay or do I go....Either way you need to put yourself first and heal from the mental abuse that you have suffered...Take Care Of Yourself First and Foremost......Good Luck!
2006-10-24 09:36:54 · answer #2 · answered by Mechelle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need a lover if you have a husband. Make a decision to stay with your husband and be true, or divorce him. Just because he's not nice is not a reason to cheat. You made a vow, so you need to step up and be responsible. You can't have your cake and eat it too. It will catch up with you, and you'll end up regretting it. Your issues with your husband won't get better if your not around to tend to the marriage. It's not something you can sweep under the rug. Maybe your husband knows that you're having an affair. I would be nasty to my husband if he was having an affair.
2006-10-24 09:32:47 · answer #3 · answered by Dawn 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to get things sorted out with yourself before you drag anyone else into your mess. If you are not happy with your husband leave him. Here is a couple things to think about though. Maybe your husband is nasty to you because you cheat on him! Maybe your lover has fun having sex with you but doesn't want a real relationship with a woman that cheats on her man. He knows if things get rocky with him you will just go sleep with someone else.
2006-10-24 11:28:02 · answer #4 · answered by roadrage995 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look sweety....
The terms Lover an Husband should never be in the same sentence unless they are one entity.
You are wrong alright on so many levels.
If you want to be a $lut..... get divorced and have fun. If you want to have a husband.... dump the jerk...who had no trouble with doing a married woman.
You can't have it both ways and really love any one of them.
2006-10-24 09:48:35 · answer #5 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's too difficult for him to see you with your husband. Decide whether your marriage is good enough to stay in or if the other guy really is the love of your life...
2006-10-24 09:37:34 · answer #6 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make the decision to leave your husband, then contact your old lover. Go about it right.
2006-10-24 09:33:59 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think if you feel that you want to have an affair, than you should leave your husband first. You will be happier and then you can look at other options, not just this guy you had an affair with.
2006-10-24 09:28:18 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
maybe he has someone else, someone that is single. i don't think you're wrong to feel that you miss him because maybe he gave you attention you wanted and was caring with you unlike your husband.
2006-10-24 09:30:38 · answer #9 · answered by shyone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get some morals, self respect, and some good old fashioned values. maybe than you will make better choices.
2006-10-24 10:16:06 · answer #10 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋