If you were not stable in your career, did not know where your life going and had no place of your own to live, would you get married?
some say, that marriage will force people to try harder in their career, get some kind of direction/purpose in life and bring stability or is it the case that you should have these first before thinking about marriage?
2006-10-23 18:51:11 · 30 answers · asked by Mark n 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Please get stable and know yourself before you get married. When you have a career and you know that you can make it on your own, your self-esteem will improve. Take your time and make sure you marry for all the right reasons. Marriage should last your life-time, please don't rush it. I know you'll make the right decision.
2006-10-23 19:27:24 · answer #1 · answered by Kyra 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I would like to have a good job from which i get a steady income able to make both ends meet and have a decent place to stay prior to getting married. Because being alone you decide things yourself and do it, but when yr married you got to consult your mate and decide things as a family. A lot of hard work comes into play and together with it problems too. Life is not without problems. So once we are stablised and on our own feet, problems are some what minimised and we can face the task that marriage brings. I hope i'm clear. Moreover i don't think you would get a good & decent guy if you were without a job / were disoriented in life.
2006-10-24 02:10:41 · answer #2 · answered by Cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you love someone enough to marry them, you want to provide the best possible life for them, not to make them suffer with the lack of a successful life. Ya gotta get it first and then add the compliments to your life...not complications.
I think marriage is not going to make anyone try harder in their career/direction/stability. It will only create regret on both sides.
2006-10-24 02:17:27 · answer #3 · answered by honeybee4u2c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what the situation, you shouldn't get married unless you feel ready. If a career and your own place is what you want before marriage, then wait. If you keep marriage in mind for the future that is definitely something that should give you purpose or motivation in life.
2006-10-24 01:56:41 · answer #4 · answered by sweet.pjs1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might force one to pursue their goals. However, I think it'd be more fun for both aspects, if you had some things already in place. As you can probably see in the marriage section, it's NOT all that simple, being happily married.
2006-10-24 01:55:49 · answer #5 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one person can tell u in which order u should do things!!
Being unemployed isnt nice wether ur single or married!!
Get off ya bum get a good job and then u can afford a nice wedding!! If u wanna get married beforehand then promise ur bride a beautiful wedding once u have the money!!
2006-10-24 01:54:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. If you didn't have any of those things, what do you have to offer the other person? Love doesn't pay the bills. Love doesn't protect you from the elements. You need to be secure in who you are, where you're going, and what you want out of life in order for a healthy, long-lasting union to flourish in.
2006-10-24 02:03:08 · answer #7 · answered by chnchita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've done it both ways (been married twice). The first one I was young, totally unprepared (no job, no home of my own, etc.) The second time I was financially and emotionally set. My personal opinion is no, don't do it until you have your own life straight. A person should be with someone because they WANT to, not because the HAVE to. Be independent, able to take care of yourself, then if you find someone you want to share your life with, you can do it without having to lean on him/her.
2006-10-24 01:58:07 · answer #8 · answered by Nvlwrtr 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well me and my bf are in the predicament right now. We are staying at his parents house until we get our bills paid off. Then we are going to either buy or build a house. We are of course going to wait until we get the house thing started before we get married. I don't want to be married and not be living in our own house. I think it would be better for the relationship to wait until you get everything straight.
2006-10-24 10:53:36 · answer #9 · answered by la_southern_femme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, thats really hard to determine......you see, some relationships are very strong, and the couple supports one another and are able to start their lives and be happy. Others aren't as lucky, and the uncertainty, and instability causes too much stress on the relationship and it fails. I guess the only way to answer that question, is to suggest that you really re-evaluate your relationship. Are you two united? Do you support each other? Its something you have to really think about.
2006-10-24 01:57:48 · answer #10 · answered by justwondering 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋