I love this guy very much and we’ve been seeing each other for 4years. We both are 24-year-old. We had everything in common and we also have big differences. But he hates commitments (he actually said that). During 4 years, our relationship was on and off. Whenever I contacted him, there was no respond at all. But last month, he text me out of nowhere, and email me too. I still love him but I got scare to go back to him after all the things he did to me. I always end up crying alone. What would you suggest? Should I go back to him or not?
2006-10-23 16:39:07 · 21 answers · asked by curious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No, you should not go back to him. I was in the same kind of situation for 6 years. We lived together just like we were married but he still said he did not want a commitment. So i kept telling myself i need to get out of this and that he would never find no one as good to him as i was. Well one day he said he was moving 4 hours away and even asked me to go. I could not go because i didn't want to up root my children from their other family and friends.I met someone else that I married and I love him very much. My ex still keeps in touch from time to time. Now he has another woman that he is with that he still will not commit to and even says if i come and stay the weekend with him he will make her leave. So to make a long story short, let him move on he will never change thats just a way for him to have you and whoever else he might want without having to answer any questions.
2006-10-23 17:26:02 · answer #1 · answered by blue 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love in and of itself is not enough to hold a relationship together. You have answered your own question. He does not want what you want, no response when you contacted him and you cry alone about him. Can you see what you have written? You are 24 and there are lots of “available” men so move on from this one. Sometimes we focus on “what could be” instead of “what is.” Look realistically at “what is” and do the right thing for yourself. I wish you all the best… hang in there.
2006-10-23 16:46:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him a second chance. Perhaps, he's a different man now. You never know until you give it a try. However, just keep in mind that you should get back with him with caution. Once when you feel like he is starting to hurt you again, then get out of the relationship ASAP. Don't linger around. Find another HOT guy. There are plenty of them out there...I think. Good luck!
2006-10-23 16:45:08 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Main Event 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO - There are many people in the world who you will find things in common with. You need to do a lot of inner exploring about yourself to find out why you would love some one who does not terat you well. You,like everyone, deserve the best, and to be treated kindly. SO TO HOOK UP WITH HIM AGAIN WILL DENY you the opportunity to find a decent person, more suitable for you.
The fact that he does not want committment is just an excuse for him to mess you around; if he says that, then he feels better about himself. Dont go back, look ahead, there is a lot better out tthere. AND dont forget to get help to find out why you continue to love someone like him......
2006-10-23 17:52:30 · answer #4 · answered by meldorhan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it sucks but you have to completely remove him from your life. After 4 years of a roller coaster relationship, you deserve more. It seems like you get hurt and just as you start to heal, he comes back in, gets your hopes up and rips your heart out again just so you can start the cycle over. It hurts like h3!! at first but in the long run, it'll be easier for you to get over him and move on if he's not around to interfere. When it comes down to it, you want commitment, he doesn't. That's one of those "deciding factor" differences. Don't go back.
2006-10-23 16:52:37 · answer #5 · answered by justme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drop this *** like a hot potato. He just wants you when he can't have anybody else. He is using you and does not give a crap. You either like being hurt, or you are so insecure that you think you can't do better. I suggest you get some good counselling, or get a life so that you don't have to think about this guy.
Baby, if it was love, he would be giving you as much as you need. I don't believe you love him, either. I think you have created some kind of dependency on him, for whatever.
2006-10-23 16:48:20 · answer #6 · answered by GORDO BLAKHART 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he's lying. But untl you can prove one way or the other, move on to another guy, with whom you have somethings in common, and some differences, but likes commitment. What did he do to you? Depending on what he did, there might've been a good reason, and it might be ok, to go back to him, until you find someone who wants to committ.
2006-10-23 16:44:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the same thing I went through years ago. I went with a guy for 5 years and he STILL didn't want to make a committment. I eventually moved on.
2006-10-23 16:43:27 · answer #8 · answered by Nancy D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you are looking for commitment then you need to move on. Why settle for something you don't want? It will be hard but things will change. You will be much happier in the end. Good luck.
2006-10-23 16:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, don't go back to him. You were on that roller coaster ride on and off for 4 years. Don't get back on. When people say they hate commitments, they usually never commit.
2006-10-23 17:08:57 · answer #10 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋