help my daughter who is 16 is pregnant with my second grandchild what do i do ?my daughter moved into her grandmothers home when she became pregnant at 14 i wasn''t ready to accept becoming a grandmother at 32 well now that i've been getting back into my daughter's and granddaughter's life she breaks the news to me that there's another one on the way i'm only 35 and my husband and i have been concidering on another baby since are youngest is 4 now,except now i don't know if i should go ahesd and get pregnant now that my daughter is,do i stop my life and become grandma all the way or is it possible yo still have another one of my own what would you do?i'm feeling very old and depressed now,to top that off i'm even becoming a great aunt from my neice.
2006-10-23 15:42:05 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
It's ok to expand your family. What your daughter does is ultimately her business now. I don't see what it really has to do with you having another baby. Both my grandmother's were pg at the same time as their mothers but that's just because they kept having babies! It's possible that she could have waited until she was 20 and married and you were in your early fourties and got pg would you have the same issues?
2006-10-23 16:09:42 · answer #1 · answered by Annie Hightower 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter already made up her decision by having these babies. Even though you couldn't stop her from getting preganant you shouldn't not be in her life. As long as she is being a good momther like you were probably to her, then you should always be in her life and be the grandmother that spoils the kids. My mother has 4 kids, 26 being her oldest, and 5 being her youngest. Both my older sister and I have a child, and now my 5 year little sister is an Aunt to them. My mother is 42 and doesn't feel like an old lady yet, she actually feels really proud of us all. When I went to her and told her I was pregnant my little sister was 3 and my mother was so happy for me, and she was excited that my little sister would have somebody to play with. I don't think there's anything wrong with you having another baby, even if your daughter is pregnant too. Hey maybe it will bring you two closer together again. I hope it all works out for you. Best Wishes!
2006-10-24 00:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by daisy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a baby if that's what your heart tells you to do. It's a tough situation with your baby having a baby so young. I feel if you do get in her life, maybe it could be some help. Not sure if she is the one raising her baby, and will with her new one too.... hopefully she has her head on her shoulders so you don't have all this responsibility! You can still be a grandmother and have lot's of fun with your grandchildren... just look at it as you are a young grandmother, and you get that much more time with them. My grandmother is young too- me, my dad, and my grandma (and great-grandma) were all 20 years apart! And it is awesome because we are all so very close, I adore my grandmother (and great-grandmother too). So I'll just say as a grandchild, I LOVE them so much, and really appreciate all the time I've gotten to spend with them!
So if your daughter will be okay with her own children, I'd go ahead and have one, if that's what I wanted in my heart! And before 40 would be best, because there could be lots of complications after 40.
I wish you the best... y ou are not old at all! Look at it as a blessing! All that time you get to spend with them! Take care!
2006-10-23 23:03:57 · answer #3 · answered by m930 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are still young...if you are looking at the possibility of having another child, then go for it. Even though your daughter has made some wrong decisions in her life that end up resulting in children being born, should not stop your life all together. I think someone needs to give your daughter a good one on one about her sex life and how to use protection, but that does not mean that you can't make a conscious decision of a married woman, to have bring another life into the world...go for it! Good luck with everything including being a grandmother again.
2006-10-23 22:47:46 · answer #4 · answered by bek1995 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are still very young and you should still carry on with your life. You tried to help your 16 year old realize having a baby was hard and for her to have another is showing how irresponsible she is, not you. But if you do have another child dont forget about your older child althou she has put you in a rough spot she still needs your love and support. Another option is adopt her baby when its born. I dont know how you feel about this. I dont know if it would make you feel whole to have a baby even though it isnt yours. But that would help your daughter out and you would have a baby to love. Im no exspert on teen pregnancy. But maybe after this child is born you should take your daughter to the Planned Parenthood and make sure she takes her Birth Control. I wish you the best of luck on what you decide. This can only be your familys choice not anyone elses. GOOD LUCK
2006-10-23 23:33:07 · answer #5 · answered by April S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you and your husband want another child, by all means you should be able to go ahead with that decision.But there are other things to consider: Are you helping financially with your grandchild and will you be in a postiion to have to help with the one on the way? I do think something is very wrong here with your 14 year old daughter having a baby, and now at 16 having another one...although she's a mother herself, she is still your child, and she's not too young to have a great role model help set her straight...she needs serious guidance.I do suggest you focus on her for a bit and get her some help, and while you're at it, you should talk to someone too about your feelings of depression.
2006-10-23 22:58:35 · answer #6 · answered by becka55 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try to talk with your daughter about her intentions. is all the responsibility going to be on you? And if your feeling depressed about your daughter having a baby maybe you will not be able to enjoy the excitement of having your own baby. Having a child as you already know is a fun experience and should be enjoyed if the time is not right then wait a little. Be there for your daughter she will need you for your expertise advice and will need your support also.
2006-10-23 22:49:09 · answer #7 · answered by angie068345 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would do what I wanted to, if you want to have another baby you should. It is possible to still be there for your daughter too. It may be easier now that she is old enough to work and possibly save money to help support the baby. But if you put your life on hold for her, then you may end up resenting your daughter. In the end you should do what makes you happiest, because the happier you are the better mom you'll be. Hope this helps. Good Luck.
2006-10-23 22:51:00 · answer #8 · answered by francesca e 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow. I would do my best to get back in your daughter's life. My mother became a grandmother in her 30s because of my older sister. My brother was 5 when she became a grandma. I think you could still have a baby if you wanted one and still be a grandmother. Your daughter is a mother as well, but since you would have kids around the same age, then they could have play dates as cousins and maybe you could be one big happy family instead of an unhappy family. Good luck to you in everything and god bless!
2006-10-23 22:48:16 · answer #9 · answered by Army Wife 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Live your life and have your baby. Your daughter moved out and is taking on her own life she needs to grow up. You can still be a good grandmother, but you are still young and should have your own baby and not take full responsibility for your daughters kids.
2006-10-23 23:04:06 · answer #10 · answered by mimi lc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋