I finally got my partener, out of my house after putting up with his crap for so long, he was abusive, horrible to live with, selfish and a alcoholic.........so why do i feel so bad, he has to go to court for tresspassing, and somehow he has turned it all around and its all my fault. what the heck did i do so wrong?
2006-10-23 08:43:49 · 19 answers · asked by donua1022 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I wont have any thing more to do with him at all, have not spoken to him, nor will. i just feel shocking and really have no one to talk to, we had been together 5 years, and it seems as it was such a wasted 5 years, i am not young, and wonder what i need to do it just get over it all and get on with life.
2006-10-23 09:29:16 · update #1
Absolutely nothing! Losers like him are use to blaming someone else. That is the sign of some sort of addiction. You did him a favor and someday he will thank you. You have been his clutch for far to long and he has taken all of his problems out on you, through his behavior and blaming you is all he knows but now he no longer has anyone to blame but his self. Now you can prosper and get your life in order, trust me you did the right thing. Sometimes woman forget about themselves, its either your kids, your man, your family what about you? Start taking the first steps to happiness and guess what honey, you just did that! I am proud of you.
2006-10-23 08:50:33 · answer #1 · answered by Kendra J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so easy you didn't continue putting up with his junk he wants u to keep being the door mat but u finally got the guts up and kick him to the curb u shook his world up side down hopefully he can finally get some help keep strong honey I know it hurts but think of a better person he will be once he begins to deal with all the issues in his life like the alcoholism, the violent tempers. Allow him the time he needs to search for help with out u trying to rescue him guild him to a rehab, church, classes give him the info let him do the work. I feel u girl I thank the Lord my husband hasn't drank for over 10 years and I know that Jesus was the one who changed him not me.
2006-10-23 15:54:08 · answer #2 · answered by wisewomaninthewest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't do anything wrong. That is what those kind of men do. They drag you down and make you always feel guilty, that is how they keep control of you. You need to ignor all of his b.s., that is the best way to get control of him. They do not like it when they are not in control. Don't feel bad over anything you did, just move on and forget about him. That is the best thing you can do. My dad is an abusive man, so I grew up in this mess, I know how it works. If you give him no attention then he will lose control over you and quit blaming yourself for anything. Everything was all his fault, not yours. Good luck.
2006-10-23 15:59:42 · answer #3 · answered by la_southern_femme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the correct thing by getting ride of this guy. No one should ever put up with being abused. why are you still talking to him? anyone who hits a women or a child out of anger is a coward. All he will do is try to manipulate you to get what is best for him. His problems are no one fault but his. The smartest thing you could do is never have any communication with this guy again. good luck to you.
2006-10-23 16:00:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha i know this is no laughing matter but it is so ironic...your life seems to be the same path as the lame Hollywood cliche. I'm sorry you feel bad. Him being a drunk and going to court isnt your fault..but youu feeling bad is. Have fun, you have friends dont you? For get about him, see other guys, go party. Not to hard though. OH!! and dont drink to much..worst thing you can do. Just dont do it. A little here and there is fine just dont get smashed.
2006-10-23 15:49:13 · answer #5 · answered by benny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done nothing wrong. You are in control and he dosn't like it. Good for you for getting rid girl, keep hold of your new found strength. Go out with your mates have some fun the bloke is obviously a total jerk. Be strong hunny the only way is up x
2006-10-23 15:50:49 · answer #6 · answered by pinkkitten 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do not feel bad! It is part of the cycle of abuse, them trying to make you feel bad for things THEY did to YOU. This is Domestic Violence Awarness Month. Google it and search for cycle of abuse. You did the right thing now stand by it. In a few months it will be over with and yor life will be SO much better. be strong and guilt-free
2006-10-23 15:54:08 · answer #7 · answered by bubba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing is wrong with you. It's just your emotions are in a whirlwind and you need someone to lay your head upon and cry. Try your mother. You didn't do anything wrong. He's just trying to get back at you for kicking him out on the curb. Tell him to "Get a life."
2006-10-23 15:49:06 · answer #8 · answered by Lone Eagle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are bound to feel a bit down just now, but you have done the right thing. Don't let this selfish bully affect another minute of your life.
2006-10-23 15:45:32 · answer #9 · answered by Ally 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reality is hitting home and it's hitting hard - you got what you wanted, but you feel bad that it didn't work out the way you hoped. Don't worry - things will start getting better fast. Hang in there!
2006-10-23 15:46:37 · answer #10 · answered by Rachel 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋