For the last few years I have been friends with "Sue" She is quite a bit younger, my kids are teenagers her kids are just starting school. I thought we had a really good relationship, had a lot of fun and our husbands got along well with each other. We both have our issues but thats part of life. She hates to have people give her advice so I was careful not to do that, although she had no problem giving me advice. A few months ago I could tell she was mad at me, so I left her alone for a few days, then called to work it out. She went nuts on me! Started yelling and telling me what a horrible person I am. Couldn't figure out why she was mad a me. Told her to call me back when she calmed down. She called back later and left a very abusive message in my voice mail and two days later recieved a letter detaling all my "faults" I am not perfect, but she was way off.Told me she was only my friend to help me change my life and to call when I wanted her help again. Would you call?
2006-10-23 08:19:39 · 15 answers · asked by Cassandra M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She has no professional training to counsel people. Most days she doesn't even bother to show or bush her hair
2006-10-23 08:29:46 · update #1
Sorry, meant to type "shower" not "show"
2006-10-23 08:32:53 · update #2
Girl she sounds like a crazy nut, drop her ***. She dosen't deserve you if she thinks she can treat you like that and be so judging when you're trying not to give her any advise because you know it offends her. She sounds like she needs to grow up.
2006-10-23 08:23:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Knowing the way that I am I would NOT call. First of all, if I have been there for someone and even went so far as to not give advice when she is giving advice left and right, then I'd have to say forget it. However, that is me. Letters, screaming, yelling and being abusive is something none of us need. Hurt feelings really suck!
Take the time, if you want, to call and find out exactly what happened. Maybe something major happened in her life and she just doesn't know how to tell you. Maybe, she really just thought she was helping you when it sounds to me like you were helping her!
2006-10-23 15:25:36 · answer #2 · answered by angels_smile75 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
under normal circumstances, i would say call and put the past behind you. the only thing is she is stating she only was your friend to change you. that's not a friend. i would NOT call but i would write her a letter and describe how you are feeling. if you call, things can get heated up. if you write, she can read your hurt all over again as opposed to calling and selectively hearing what she wants to hear. good luck, i understand you want to work things out...but why really bother? at least leave things on a positive note and try not to be with her so much.
if this doesn't work itself out by Christmas, I'd definitely send a card and maybe that will end all the animosity.
2006-10-23 15:25:08 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends wether you want to tolerate volatile behavior from another who is a supposed friend. I think you acted in a very calm and controlled manner when she was addressing you on the phone like that, lesser people would have taken the bait and retaliated. If I were you, I'd have a good hard think about what you want out of friendships and I bet this sort of behavior is not what you had in mind. If this is the case, cut your losses with this person and concentrate on making new friends who have an equal regard for other people in their lives.
2006-10-23 15:25:40 · answer #4 · answered by mizzsquitz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um it sounds to me like she's a little off. Sorry but that makes no sense what so ever. Why would you want a friend like that. I mean if she can't really say what happened to bring on her being so bitter with you I'd say forget her.
2006-10-23 15:23:59 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely would not call back. There are plenty of other people in this world worth being friends with.
2006-10-23 15:21:43 · answer #6 · answered by s v 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you believe you need her help call her back... but if you do you might want to ask to see her credentials, like a degree in psychiatry, psychology,theology,philosophy... anything that might give her the idea that she is qualified to help you. otherwise nah, I'd pass on that one.
2006-10-23 15:25:49 · answer #7 · answered by anti pc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way, Jose. Friendships are two-way things. She needs to change too and you need to let her know that. If she's that selfish, and doesn't take that advice, then just drop it. Its not worth your time.
2006-10-23 15:24:03 · answer #8 · answered by Angie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if there's nothing wrong w/ you, and she's just being psycho then I'd say don't call. But if you really need help with something and think she can help, then by all means, go for it.
2006-10-23 15:22:26 · answer #9 · answered by xoxmissjxox 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
umm...... definitely no! Sue is kind of nuts. move on is plenty of more friends out there waiting to meet you! You'll survive without Sue!
2006-10-23 15:39:14 · answer #10 · answered by Lavender da Great!!! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋