I MET SOMEONE AND WE ARE REALLY IN LOVE, BUT HE SAYS IS NOT READY TO LIVE WITH MY SONS. I KNOW HE LOVES ME AND I UNDERSTAND HIM. HE´D LIKE TO LIVE WITH ME AND SHARE OUR LIVES BUT WHEN HE REALIZES ABOUT REALITY HE GETS DEPRESSED AND DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO DO. I´M SAD, BECAUSE I LOVE HIM. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO, MAY BE SOMEONE IS OR WAS IN THE SAME SITUATION AND CAN GIVE ME HOPE.
THANKS.
2006-10-23 07:42:19 · 12 answers · asked by mami 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I´M NOT CHOOSING TO LIVE WITH HIM OR LIVE WITH MY SONS, OBVIOUSLY., I´M NOT THINKING ABOUT IT, I LOVE MY SONS.
OTHER THING IS THAT HE DIDN´T MEET THEM YET. I ´D LIKE TO KNOW HOW TO HELP HIM TO MAKE THINGS EASIER, OR IF YOU THINK IT´S IMPOSIBLE.
2006-10-23 08:45:48 · update #1
I was with a bloke for three years, and i wanted to know that one day our two worlds would meet. I at the time had 2 boys who were 8 & 6 (Five years ago). He never once in the 3 years that were together say that he loved me, but he did very loving things, if that makes sense. I asked the question about the two worlds and he said 'No' i hoped that he would change his mind, he never did...so i ended it. I can honestly say he was my true love. It broke my heart and i made myself very ill and i was very angry due to the fact he knew i had kids from the outset! Hun i hope he does realise as you come as a package, and he can't just have the funtime part of you, he has to realise that you are a mother first and then a lover. I'm not saying end it but that was my situation, for my own sanity it was a case of knowing that i would be him eventually or not at all. I always hoped that he would come banging on my door he never did. He went on to meet another women who caused him a great deal of grief, and i met him last year, he said i was the most normal person he had ever met....but he didn't want that, did he? I have been single ever since
Good Luck!
2006-10-23 07:53:57 · answer #1 · answered by untanuta 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to ask a question to answer this question.... How old are the Sons? Are they like at the age to where they should already be out on their own? If so, This is your time! Enjoy your life with your new found fella and tell your sons to quit trying to make you rlife miserable.. Time to cut the cord..
If this be the case. The NEW MAN in your life probably knows that the sons do not like him or want to have anything to do with him.. of course this would steer me in a different direction as well.
But of course, If the Sons in question are still teenagers under the age of 18 then the NEW MAN who supposedly Loves you should know that this is a Package Deal.. Your family comes first! And if this man can not accept this, than he's not much of a man.
2006-10-23 07:53:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This should not even be a concern for you. This man loves you but not your kids and you are still trying to figure out how you can make things work? Are you out of your mind? These are your kids. They should come first. Why would you want to be with a man that wants you, but without the kids? Come on, now.
2006-10-23 07:45:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not in the same sitch, but I can help you. If he doesn't want to live with your kids, ask him why not. There might be something he really dislikes about your kids that you don't even know about. Once you know about it, you can try to fix it. If you can't, and he still isn't ready to move in with your kids, don't let it get you down. If I wre you, I would be more concerned about your kids than about him. I mean, they are your kids, and you have to do what's best for them.
2006-10-23 07:52:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does he expect you to do, abandon your family, this is not fair and is not true love,except for himself.
How can you understand that he loves you but can't accept what is part of you what you conceived, you have blinders on girl. If he is depressed over this little gem don't let him move in, he is already trying to control your relationships with your son, shame on him and shame on you if you allow him to. There are far greater men out there believe me. You don't have to compromise your family for the selfishness of one man.
2006-10-23 07:49:49 · answer #5 · answered by Neptune2bsure 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your sons!!! Of course Im a kid i would feel horrible if my mother left me for a love. Tell him to take a chance. Tell your sons to take a chance. If he really loves you he will give them a try....
2006-10-23 07:49:26 · answer #6 · answered by SuWizzle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately you may have to move on. You and your sons are a packaged deal and he knew this when he met you.
2006-10-23 07:46:29 · answer #7 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,my mom is dating some guy that doesn't mind us. but i dont like him i think you have to talk to your sons first and not rush anything.
2006-10-23 07:45:33 · answer #8 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love me, love my children. That's all I have to say about that.
2006-10-23 07:48:24 · answer #9 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he's not ready to live with your sons, then he's not ready to live with you!
your children should come first
and talk to them too
b/c if he doesn't like your kids enough to live with them, then they probably don't like him either
2006-10-23 07:48:46 · answer #10 · answered by moi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋