I recently found my father after 28 years. He happens to be a very rich man with a very shady past. His family was highly involved in a hate group in the South. He has offered maybe out of guilt I don't know to buy me a home & pay for my sons college. My brother who recieved the same offer says I'd be a fool not to take it being a divorced mom. But I just turned him down because I feel like it would all be tainted with biogotry. I will not change my mind but I just wanted to know if anyone else would have turned him down?
2006-10-23 07:15:28 · 18 answers · asked by gitsliveon24 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think 90% of people would SAY that they would turn down the money, but they would all take it. I think it shows a strong moral character, and I hope your children get that strength passed to them.
To the rest of the answerers that are going to say they wouldn't take it, you couldn't know that until you are truly in this situation.
2006-10-23 07:20:22 · answer #1 · answered by QuestionWyrm 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow. that is a tough question.
i am divorced myself, and living paycheck to paycheck.
it would be a hard decision to have to make.
i would, only because i think it would help not only you, but your son. and use what resources this man gives you, in a positive way.
turn the tables around, for the better. be an example to this man, of what money can do. be an influence.
donate some of the money he gives you, to local charities, and the groups he is against.
do some good with it.
but yes in the long run, i would probably turn him down too. if he does have that bad of a background, it would be hard to accept something from this man that supports hate groups.
because accepting the resources, may make you feel that you are supporting them too.
and God will have other opportunities for you, financially for your sons education.
do what you feel is right. no one knows this man like you do. we can only go by what you say.
if it makes you feel that uncomfortable, guilty and not safe, then by no means, don't take his offers.
i will go by what you say and how you feel, i would not take the offers.
those are my thoughts and opinions on the matter...
good luck and God Bless.
2006-10-23 14:30:36 · answer #2 · answered by dragonsclaw27 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As long as the house is put into your name, go for it! If nothing else, take the money for your child's education. College tuition is raising at a faster rate than financial aid is. It soon may make college out of reach for some people. And if your son can go to school and not have any loans in the end, that is an awesome start for him! You're a fool, a darn fool for passing up this opportunity for your family!
2006-10-23 17:07:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
so you father may have been i na hate group fro mteh south .... does this mean his money is no good ? NO he may have been an honest business man and the money was earned through business. So you turned him down , Ok fine live with it. Dont try to justify it now by saying you would ruin your biogotry.
Sorry but you made a choice and now you want others to give you a thumbs up or down .
You say if you took the money you would be a biget .So fine thats your point of view , now you sto pand think wait this may have been my sons shot at a secure future , matter little now you feeling interferred with your thought of providing for your son. According the ways people are dealign with issues like this from our past Repproations are needed ot cure the injustices of our forefathers ways .So you decided not to take those stpes. Good Luck with your future and next tiem you might wantto think first before you open yourm outh.
best to secure a education for your children before you let your mind play tricks on your and decide it is blood money whe nyou dont know where the money came from . Seems ot me you have issues with your father and you allow those to cloud judgements for the rest of your family.
I would have taken the money and placed it in a trust fund for my child for school or when they turn 35 yrs old.this way they have a start at getting a leg up for themselves.
2006-10-23 14:25:32 · answer #4 · answered by Glenn T 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It comes down to this. What do you want them to learn? Rich people aren't necessarily good people. Growing up knowing the difference between right and wrong is far more valuable as a tool than growning up with a trust fund. If you really feel that it's a bad lesson for your children, then don't take the money.
On the other hand, is accepting the money actually wrong? Is it possible for you to take advantage of this opportunity without endorsing the types of actions that brought the money on?
2006-10-23 14:22:18 · answer #5 · answered by Beardog 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Congratulations. I would have turned him down. You can always get along with what you make and your son can work to help pay his way through college. But if you take tainted money, in your mind you would never be at peace. Again, be proud of what you did and you have also set a good example for your son.
2006-10-23 14:20:04 · answer #6 · answered by phoenixheat 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think that would depend on whether he was personally involved in getting the money through shady means. If it's just money that was passed on to him, I think I'd be okay with it but if he got the money by continuing the bigotry, I'd say no.
Another factor to consider would be whether he's trying to now be a part of your life or if he just wants to pay you off. If that's the case, I'd say no regardless of the money's source.
Most people will probably say, "take the money". I say, good for you for sticking to your principles!
2006-10-23 14:22:29 · answer #7 · answered by 40yomama 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have turned him down also. I would never allow my home or my child's future to be purchased with money that was gained by hurting other people. I commend you for sticking with your morals after your brother ridiculed you for not taking your father's offer. I think you will be happier in the future knowing that you didn't sacrifice what you believe in just to get ahead.
2006-10-23 14:20:32 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You should be very proud of yourself to do that. I wish I could say that I would have done the same thing. It was a great opportunity but in the long run you did the right thing. Give yourself a pat on the back. It takes a stronger person to do what you did.
2006-10-23 14:22:30 · answer #9 · answered by bree_1384 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You said his family was invloved in the hate group; are you sure HE was also involved in the hate group? Can you say that every dime this man EVER earned was a result of involvement in hate groups? I don't know if you can answer these questions but me personally.....I would most-likely take it.
2006-10-23 14:20:27 · answer #10 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋