Ok, when she and I got together 6 months ago she told me she had never orgasmed during sex. She said she always faked it & she also told me most women do fake it. She was telling the truth, no matter what I do, I can't get her to get off, no matter what position. She can orgasm while masterbating but even I can't get her off that way, it has to be done a certain way for her to come off. Also her legs have to be stretched out completely straight before getting off. What is going on & how can I help her achieve the Big O?? Also is this normal with most women??
2006-10-23 06:14:11 · 26 answers · asked by Andre 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, it is perfectly normal. A lot of women don't orgasm through intercourse.
2006-10-23 06:16:47 · answer #1 · answered by It'sMe23 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not normal in most women. First of all, she should show you /tell you what to do to help get her off. Also have you tried to help her orally? Try oral and stimulate her G-spot at the same time. Also, if you are manually doing the work, put a little lube on your fingers because dry touch can be painful.
Another thing to try is a bullet vibrator. Use it before and while having normal intercourse and it should do the trick. Start off by placing it near the "button" (if you get my meaning) and if that doesn't work, place it directly on the "button". If the bullet can't "press her button" nothing can.
The leg stretch thing is also probaly to make the surrounding skin taught thereby making stimulation easier.
The whole purpose of pre-coital stimulation is to get the "button" engorged with blood so that when you get in the "saddle" your riding movement will hit the "button" as well as the "G", G.
2006-10-23 06:26:08 · answer #2 · answered by Biggen 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Although sex is a physical act most aspects of it are actually mental. Her problem is most likely in her mind. She probably achieved her first orgasm when she was masturbating, and her second and so on masturbating the same way, so she has a block in her mind making her believe this is the only way she can achieve one. Since she's become so familiar with this routine it might be difficult to break through it.
Personally, I never masturbated before the first time I had intercourse, and since my girlfriend enjoyed sex quite often I never found reason to try it while I was with her. When we broke up and I found myself between girlfriends I tried it but couldn't ejaculate no matter what I tried, I was so used to achieving orgasm by being inside of a woman. It took many months before that was no longer true.
2006-10-23 06:30:57 · answer #3 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've got to help her find a way... some other answerers were right on the money when they suggested oral sex. If you've never done that before, check out some websites to learn some good techniques.
For intercourse, I am guessing the answer is that she has trouble stimulating the clitoris during sex. Try to concentrate on rubbing your pelvis (not too hard!) against her clitoris and pubic bone. It might work best for her if she goes on top, leans her torso toward you to get her pelvis at the right angle, and grinds nice and slow until it feels great.
The "straight leg" thing is probably all in her head... the legs shouldn't have to be straight, although some women tense their muscles a lot to help build the climax. It's no fun to only be able to use one position... she's got to open her mind to other things.
2006-10-23 06:27:43 · answer #4 · answered by Heidi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1) Every woman's body is different.
#2) For women, so much of the "O" is mental.
#3) It's very common for a woman to be unable to reach orgasm during intercourse.
My advice: practice with your hand and fingers. Experiment: try the shower, a jacuzzi, giving her head... Once she can do that in your presence (and with your assistance!), it should be easier for her.
It's probably a mental block - I had one for many years, and it just took the right man and a lot of patience on his part. Now, there are times when I just can't stop!
Good luck.
2006-10-23 06:20:45 · answer #5 · answered by 40yomama 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is true that the majority of women cannot have vaginal orgasms. A woman can climax usually only from stimulation to the clitoris. I've never had an orgasm during sex. It's odd that you can't get her off by rubbing her clitoris, but keep trying. Ask her to tell you what feels good and have her guide your hand. When she does it for herself, put your hand on hers so you can tell what she is doing.
2006-10-23 06:17:43 · answer #6 · answered by joolee8503 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How often do you have sex? And how often does she do it herself? Sometimes it's a problem when you do it every chance you have. Try to limit it first and see what happens. You're girlfriend is very lucky that you're very concern about her orgasm, some men don't even care as long as they are getting it. Me? Let's just say that I'm one of the very few women who were blessed with the ability to come again and again. My partner stopped counting when I reach eighth in a row. Of course he's really, really good and he can control himself to prolong it.
2006-10-23 06:33:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not every woman orgasms during intercourse. They may require external stimulation. From what you described, it sounds like your gf is one of those women. First, you're putting too much pressure on yourself (and her) to make her orgasm. Relax and have fun during sex. Play with her, and watch her play with herself, mix things up, pay close attention to her response as you do different things. It'll happen. Just think of all the fun you'll have together on the journey!!!
2006-10-23 06:18:19 · answer #8 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just like men, all women can orgasm and don not nec. have to fake it- thank God I've got a hubby who is concerned as much about me and mine as his (no judgement on you there!) She just needs to learn a bit more about herself- it took a bit before I was relaxed enough with myself and my sexuality to "let her rip" and fall into the state easily that I do every time now- but we've been together for a long time. When we first were physical, I had to have a drink or two to loosen up- he didn't like it much and we aren't drinkers but it worked. Give her some fun books to read- buy her some kama sutra and have a little massage fest! Maybe she needs to learn how to play.....Good luck! Its good of you to be concerned, but don't take it personally...Maybe she could straddle you and rock on the "horse"-thats fun too!
2006-10-23 06:21:20 · answer #9 · answered by ARTmom 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Women do fake it sometimes but I don't believe that it is the norm. Try stimulating her to the point where she is almost about to *** and then enter her. Also try having her stretch her legs straight out when you are having intercourse, I have tried this position before and it feels great and my husband says that they position feels good to him also. Good luck.
2006-10-23 06:22:32 · answer #10 · answered by juicie813 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋