What to do when husband wants to have 3 even 4somes?

Answer 1

RUN far away! DO NOT give in!

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

If my husband even thought about having 3 or 4somes i would probably leave him!! That is wrong that just means he is not happy with the sex and want some one else. Test him and ask if you did have a 3 or 4some who would you pick and if he answers right away punch him and leave him!!

Answer 4

I guess it depends on what you want to do.

Damn, I'd be super jealous if I were you, because you'd be watching your husband have sex with other people.

If you think it's what you want, and you think you can cope with it, I guess you'd better set down some ground rules. For instance, will both of you actually have sex with other people, or will it be watching only. Would touching other people be allowed? Oral sex, but no intercourse? What about safe sex, and the use of condoms, and whether you would let another guy besides your husband ejaculate in your mouth?

What if you're attracted to the people, but he's not, or vice versa. Do you call it off? How well do you have to know the people before you will have an orgy with them?
Is this something you'd feel comfortable about other people knowing? If not, how will you conduct these activities so that it's your little secret?

In my opinion, it's a bad idea and it wouldn't be for me. Some people say it works for them, but I have my doubts.

Answer 5

First ask yourself (and be serious, don't do it just because he wants it) if you are interested.

If you are then proceed carefully. Learn about the lifestyle before you commit.

If you are not, then you have to let him know you are not interested. You may need couples therapy. He probably has issues that need to be resolved. There is an inadequency in the relationship he feels will be filled with these adventures. He may try to find them else where. This is more than likely not a desire that has just popped into his head. Try searching for marriage or couple's theray near you and see what you can find and try to get him to go with you.

Answer 6

If he is a swinger and you are and have no intentions of becoming one then it wont work. Depending on you guys marriage and the history of love that you have together then it may not be that big of a deal. He maybe trying to tell you that he wants to do different things with you and he respects you enough to ask you and not go behind your back.
I am with someone who told me that he tried it once with a couple he knows before he met me which pique my curiosity. Later I wanted him to introduce me to the couple but he do not want me to do it. He is afraid I will leave him. But I believe if we do it together then it will be better than going out behind each other backs and getting excited without each other. It is your call sweetie.
If you want to just start off by asking him questions as to why he wants to do it. Ask him what made him decide to want to do it. Ask him do he have anyone in mind. Ask him do he want only females or do he want men present also. Watch porn movies together if you don't already do it. Go to a swingers website together to get more answers. Be more open minded because chances are once you start inquiring about it he might change his mind. In the event that he don't and you do tell him that you are not comfortable about it but maybe later you will be. Gradually make that move if it is what you want. It doesn't mean that he do not love you.

Answer 7

You should first of all be happy he felt comfortable telling you this.

You guys should talk about it and see how you feel about it. There is a lot of information on the Internet. But I would probably like to talk to someone who had actually done it before.

You can probably go to a swinger part too. First. Just to see and feel and smell the environment. See how you really feel. You can go to one and just "be there" and not actually do anything.

You can say "I think I feel this way or that way" but until it happens you never really know.

Don't try it if you are AT ALL not comfortable about it.

That is a very personal choice and outside "normal" but it can be fun for the right couples.

Answer 8

Tell him there is never anything good that comes from them. I have known several couples who have lost their 10+ years marriages due to these types of things. The man talks the woman into something she's not totally into and it turns out really bad for everyone involved.

I would then see a therapist, because if he's intent on doing this, it might be possible he does this with or without you.

Answer 9

multiple partners DO NOT mean good things for a long term relationship. It's an exciting idea, and maybe some people are meant to "swing" but if you are married the idea is that you are committed EXCLUSIVELY for life. Someone will get jealous or want more than the other partner every time. Watch more porn together, participate in fantasies together, but bringing in others is bringing in trouble.
good luck!

Answer 10

I think I'd need more information. I guess you don't? Well, then tell him no.

Why is it that when a woman asks, "Can I have this?" and her husband says, "No, I'm not up for it," that's perfectly okay, even if she keeps asking and he keeps saying no, but when he wants something and asks, she throws a panic attack at the prospect he might want something she doesn't? Yes, he wants something. He wants you more than he wants that, otherwise he'd have done it without you. Yes, he'll ask again, and again, and again, because he wants it a lot. He still wants you more. Just keep saying no.

Answer 11

Ask him if he would be concerned if the other party was better or bigger. And if he would be upset if you fell for that other person. My ex-husband started to ask for threesomes and those two questions, stopped him from asking.

You did not clarify if he was looking for men or women or both.

If he is looking for other women, you can tell him that the only way you will do it is if you get to choose and the first time it is going to be an extra man of your choice, then start naming things that he would find revolting.