hes in iraq now but i havent spoke to him for a while now and im wondering if he will still want me if i change a little.
2006-10-23 04:01:27 · 21 answers · asked by hevel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
after the war when he returns expect him also be changed....he become more humane...coz smell of blood, flesh, artillaries and cruel sounds of war and innocent cries might have changed him as a person. So if u'r change is in good way, definitely he'll accept that.
Expect him be a man with more morals learnt than a warrior with more orders to obey!
2006-10-23 04:09:36 · answer #1 · answered by Jasee J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a current soldier, I can tell you that war definitely changes you - it's not always for the best, but it's not always for worse either. At any rate, if he's in Iraq I guarantee that he is pretty busy and may not be able to contact you too much. Unless he's come out and said it, it doesn't mean he doesn't care anymore. He could well be thinking about you all the time.
It didn't happen to me, but I saw a lot of relationships end due to long deployments, and often times before they were over and far too often because of the person back in the States and not the guy doing his job in Iraq. For your boyfriend's sake I'd like to at least say that you should stick with him until he gets back at the very least unless he's been a jerk who's told you that he doesn't care anymore. I've just seen too many good guys have their girl leave them for someone else while they were on deployment. Just some advice from a guy who's been in those shoes.
2006-10-23 11:13:13 · answer #2 · answered by iamdoycha 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My fiance is in Iraq and I was wondering the same thing. Here is what I decided while thinking about it.
He is EXTREMELY busy in Iraq. He rarely gets the time to sleep, let alone contact home alot. He was up for 28 hours straight, one day this past week, working. (They give them gum with caffiene in it to keep them awake, its called Stay Alert)
Our guys arent calling home nearly as often as they would like to. Trust me, they WANT to, it just isnt always possible. There are many reasons.
If you love him, be strong and supportive. With time, everyone changes. That is what we are supposed to do. As long as we grow, and move forward, it is a positive thing.
If your relationship has a good foundation, and your love is strong, it can withstand anything. If it was meant to be, it will be. If you both change and find you arent comfortable with the changes, than remain friends and move on. It is the healthy thing to do. Some people are meant to be together in a relationship, some people are meant to be friends, and some people are only in our lives for a short time, but if you handle things correctly, they help us learn and grow.
If you ever need to talk, send me an email. You will be in my thoughts and prayers!!
2006-10-23 11:10:23 · answer #3 · answered by sdubsdub 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in Iraq and Afghanastan for three out of the past five years. Everytime I came back from my combat tours, I was a little bit different. I was never psyco or lost control of my emotions. Depending on his job over there, he might come back a little jumpy. If you are still interested in him, you should attempt to contact him before he comes back. People in the United States do not realize how much it means to us soldiers to have contact with our lives back home while we are gone. I imagine that you breaking contact with him like you did hurt him in a way that you probably couldn't understand. The sooner you reestablish your contact with him, the better your chances of salvaging your relationship with him upon his return home. I know you said that you changed, however, he wants more than anything else to return to his normal life with you in it. Trust me, I have spent 3 of the past 5 years over there.
2006-10-23 11:11:40 · answer #4 · answered by zitterich138 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
remember he has changed too, he has seen lots of things he may not want to talk about right away or ever. He may also have a hard time adjusting to being home and not constantly under fire,until he has had time to get used to being home don't expect too much or put any commitment pressure on him, he may also have some really bad night mares.Let him tell you when he is ready for your relationship and discuss the changes you have made while he was gone
2006-10-23 11:06:40 · answer #5 · answered by g m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can say that my husband still loved me and wanted to be with me after he came back. We both changed and did a lot of growing during that time period, and I think it made us stronger and better as a couple. I think that it will benefit you in the long run, troubled times like these lead to stronger relationships in the end. Try to keep that in mind, and everything will work out. :)
2006-10-23 11:05:01 · answer #6 · answered by BeezKneez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think with time both of you would have changed. Maybe you guys can get together and get to know each other all over again. Show him the "you" now and get to know the new him as well. Give it time and see what happens.
2006-10-23 11:04:47 · answer #7 · answered by dsd 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be as supportive as you can and let thins shake out the way they may when he gets home.
War is tough and it can really affect people's minds. I think having a good, supportive (and faithful) woman at home would be worth coming back to. Good luck!
2006-10-23 11:04:52 · answer #8 · answered by michaelyoung_airforce 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change is not necessarily bad.
Change everything else but don't change how you feel about him.
I think that will shine through any amount of change.
2006-10-23 11:07:14 · answer #9 · answered by demi-kun 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both have changed you both will need to learn to love the new yous. It's also him who will be differnt.
2006-10-23 11:02:49 · answer #10 · answered by Juleette 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋