They aways see the bad in them
2006-10-23 02:11:09 · 15 answers · asked by The Cat 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm still friends with all of my ex-girlfriend, but my ex-wife is another story. We split up as friends, but it was not until she let one of her boyfriends beat the hell out of my youngest daughter that turned it all around.
2006-10-23 02:17:48 · answer #1 · answered by lifescircle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, women do it as well. I have met women who were divorced years ago who still haven't put it in the past and seem to live around whining about and making their prior husband's life a living hell.
That said, in my experience most ex-husbands are the same jerks that caused the divorce to begin with, so the put downs are not surprising. And guys, before you assume I am a femi-nazi mail put down artist, keep reading.
Not all men engage in back-biting against the ex-, though if the man was the "victim" of the divorce causing behavior it is normal to go through a period of pain recovery where it seems like every facet of the ex-'s crap seems to have to be verbally vomited out.. Best done with close family, friends, and counseling resources. This is a normal part of the grieving process for both sexes, by the way.
That said, and as I am after that point in time, to the limits possible I do not discuss my ex-, her old bad behaviors, etc. at all. Where it gets tricky is that if I am asked why I am divorced, I can't always dodge the question with a non-judgemental answer. In my case the divorce was necessary to order to protect my children from serious damage by the ex-, which I will not specify, but once even that small of a statement is in play a person can pretty much guess that her behavior must have been pretty bad. But if I am asked by certain individuals (school counselors, for example) then I have to provide the details to back it up.
Put down artists are a dime a dozen. Good men are not.
2006-10-23 03:12:25 · answer #2 · answered by HeartSpeaker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not always. I've been seperated from my husband well will be a year on oct 28th. Divorce is almost final and we get along great. No bad talkin bout eachother nothing. It just takes time and honestly in most men putting their ex's down makes them feel better about it being over. That's not just men though. Women do it too!
2006-10-23 02:15:51 · answer #3 · answered by babyangel4604 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because they need to grow up and move on. I have two ex's the first one is like a best friend most the time. LOL until he starts dating some one then he gets this macho BS guy thing going on where he has to treat me different. Then my last ex has always been a jerk I just didn't notice it until I moved out.
2006-10-23 02:35:47 · answer #4 · answered by jn46036 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After a relationship has ended most people realize it ended because of some fault of their own. I take responsibility for causing some of the heartache in my past marriage. I realize it was mainly him with abuse but I found out he was telling people I was abusing him (which was not the case at all) when I confronted him on this he told me it's easier to blame me then to stand up and say it was because of his own actions he is now miserable.
I think it's kinda like putting the blame on the one you love it easiest because you can say it wasn't your own fault it is over.
You will always hear people bashing their ex's it's our societies way.... but be true to yourself and no one will believe the lies. Because you can prove yourself.
2006-10-23 02:16:58 · answer #5 · answered by razzyrascal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This could happen to either party, the ex husband, or ex wife. People put other people down, so they can make them selves feel better, or bigger. And sometimes they are just jealous.
2006-10-23 02:22:34 · answer #6 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its definitely the reason they are no longer together! Also its sad because if you see the goof putting the other down, that shows they cannot accept the fact they had a wrong in the marriage...too bad if there are children involved:(
2006-10-23 02:15:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
EGO,
If you get divorced and your ex is happier and doing good, it means that it was your fault it didn't work. Which a man's ego can't accept, so they try to make the ex's life more miserable so that they don't feel guilty for the bad marraige.
2006-10-23 02:19:56 · answer #8 · answered by tightlies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cos they cannot accept the wife is doing better and living much happier after leaving him...I think is the pride issue.
2006-10-23 02:15:24 · answer #9 · answered by vosy2006 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, sounds like you were the one that was "right." I think it comes down to an "I know I'm wrong and can't think of anything else to say" type of an attitude.
2006-10-23 02:24:12 · answer #10 · answered by stratplayer1967 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋