After the birth of our daughter my fiance started chattin to girls on the net, getting very friendly and def very personel with them. i forgave him and he promised never to do it again, since then he has done it 3 more times. the latest being my best friend he tried it on with. he denys everything but i have seen the emails and text for myself. this really hurt me and on a night out i kissed someone. now he is making me out to be the biggest tart in town, ive had to stop seeing my best friend and now he has said i have to move away from my home town to have a chance with him. which i have said ill do. should he still be crucifying me after what hes done to me?
2006-10-22 23:27:26 · 11 answers · asked by Paula C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Your crazy if you leave your family and friends for this guy. This relationship has problems that moving is not going to solve. Get out of town now........with out him.
2006-10-22 23:31:34 · answer #1 · answered by Captain Comment 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is he suggesting that you move away from your town? It's so that you have no chance of meeting this guy you've kissed and yet he can still access these women he's been chatting to on the internet from wherever you are in the country.
Moving away from your town will involve a life changing decision, I would think. You probably have support systems like friends, neighbours and relatives close at hand now when you have a baby and need them most. Moving away will make you further isolated and does not mean as much for him as he will still carry on as he always has.
You need to get to the bottom of why he feels the need to chat to other women on the internet than have a real relationship with you. What's going on that he needs to try it on with your so-called best mate? Why is he stopping you seeing her? Is he worried what she's going to say to you?
He got so upset over you kissing the other guy because your misdemeanour happened in reality whereas he does not feel he is being unfaithful to you as it is in a virtual world. He would like to think that women still find him attractive even if he will never meet them whilst knowing that a real man has definitely found his girlfriend attractive enough to kiss.
Find out urgently what has gone wrong in the relationship. Does he feel that the baby gets more attention from you than he does? Is he feeling left out when everyone comes round clucking about the baby and ignoring him? Perhaps his parents are not as supportive of him as yours are of you. Maybe things aren't going too well at work and he is, wrongly, blaming minor problems in your relationship.
Doing things 'tit-for-tat', ie he did this to me so I'm going to do that to him, is not the solution - it makes the problem worse. Where will that end? Try leaving the baby with grandma for a couple of hours and really talking one to one and getting this sorted once and for all.
2006-10-22 23:42:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
GET A GRIP! For gods sake, talk about putting a twist on things for his own benefit! Wheres your backbone?Why do you feel that a man who treats you like something he scraped form his shoe, has a say over what sounds like a very poor relationship. This man sounds like a manipulative conniver, and your letting him call he shots! You've found out about him trying it on with your friend, and he lied to you about his Internet 'friends', so what else do you think he may have done without you finding out. Dont trust him, he doesn't sound worth it, and don't stay with him because its easier! My cousin had a cheating, childish husband who left her five weeks ago and decided to then sleep with her friend. He left her with three little girls, and she holds her head up high in the knowledge that she is strong enough to cope on her own and that she doesn't want or need him. cant you be the same? good luck.
2006-10-22 23:37:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say you both definately have issues .... don't move anywhere ... go get councelling .... if you move to a place where one of you has other friends it will just make it worse ... if you move to a place where neither of you have freinds you'll both be lonely and find it difficult to trust each other ... stay where you are and sort this mess out ... try and find what it was you had before the baby was born
2006-10-22 23:32:54 · answer #4 · answered by deadkelly_1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.. I think you should have left him after he started flirtly with the chicks on line and specailly your friend but i under stand you have a daughter with him...anyways.. you forgave him for his mistake and gave him another chance (which he blow) now he should do the same.. be careful this could be the start of a pattern.. he does something to you so you do somethingback... best of luck!! P.S. you shouldn*t have to move.. he needs to get over it!
2006-10-22 23:36:11 · answer #5 · answered by sxylilcracker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get someone else, he is a run around and does not respect you enough to have a sound relationship. Don't waste any more time. He is running around probably, and has lost interest. You deserve better.
2006-10-22 23:35:55 · answer #6 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both wrong. You should break up with him and find someone else. He's not going to change and you'll keep getting hurt.
I felt sorry for you until you said you kissed someone else. I feel sorry for your daughter.
2006-10-22 23:32:43 · answer #7 · answered by ssbn598 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r both as bad as each other, split up 4 the sake of ur poor lil girl she doesn't deserve this as you will never work out. y prolong the agony
2006-10-22 23:35:58 · answer #8 · answered by LUCY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you're both as stupid as the other. He's a lying cheat and you're a vengeful cheat. Don't do anything solely on his account, because he probably wouldn't do anything similar for you.
2006-10-22 23:31:40 · answer #9 · answered by rosbif 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only move with him if you are certain you want to make a permanent relationship with him.
because your relationship is going to be bumpy for however long it takes for you both to trust again .. perhaps a year or two.
it might be that he really wants a change of scenery for you both.
2006-10-22 23:34:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋