My husband who cheated on me still having his relationship with his woman. Lately I get to know that he is not only on relationship with one but two whom he get to know in chatline. But still he still cared for me and my son. I still love him but also hate him, therefore I thought of divorce will be the best option since he told me he will not give up his relationship with two of his women and also me... What I need to do, so my son will not get affected because of our divorce??
2006-10-22 22:14:20 · 14 answers · asked by rose 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sadly, your son will get affected by divorce no matter how you do it. Important thing is to make sure he doesn't feel it is his fault in any way. Kids feel like this sometimes when parents divorce. They feel worthless and unwanted. Since your husband is acting rather immature, I wouldn't live it up to him to tell the new to your son.
So he says he won't give up the relationship with those two, and with you as well? Maybe there is some hope here, girl. You need to get through to him. Clearly, he still wants you, but he is just very confused. Those 2 will have to go, no doubts about that. If you think you will be able to forgive him after that, you shouldn't give up just yet. However, if you feel like giving up - I don't blame you. I know how much it hurts and how quickly you get fed up with it.
2006-10-22 22:17:37 · answer #1 · answered by Snowflake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you think he's immature then sure, wait until he graduates. I was 17 when my parents split, and to honest it didn't bother me at all until years later. But... by the sound of it, you haven't made any attempt at reconciliation. Maybe your husband is distant because he has deep hidden resentments, and he thinks you need to make changes. There could be all kinds of reasons why a perfectly good marriage hits the dirt. Sometimes, these issues can be resolved, and with determination you could end up being happier than if you simply split. You should consider Marriage Counselling, or at least make it known to your husband that you are willing to work through the problems. See if he is willing to make it work. Did you consider the financial aspects of a divorce? How will your life change if you commit to this? I urge you to seriously consider alternatives to going your separate ways. There is far too much divorce in this country. It's giving marriage a bad name.
2016-03-28 04:45:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way that your son will not be affected. You should leave it up to your husband to explain to your son why the relationship is ending since he is the result (depending on how old your son is). Things will be rough for all of you at first, but in time you will feel better and find someone that has more respect for you and will accept your child. Good luck with that!
2006-10-22 22:18:18 · answer #3 · answered by bezsenný 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your son will be affected by it, but you can't be in a relationship just for your son and obligation. Let your son know that you still love his dad but your dad did something wrong to you and you can't be with him any more. Give good reasons why you can't be with his dad any more. It always hurts a child when their parents aren't together and divorce. Just let your son know that mommy and daddy will no longer be married because he was with another person and you don't want to be him because of that. Just let him down easy.
2006-10-22 22:38:19 · answer #4 · answered by delawaregirl83 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on age, sit down and have a talk with your son about getting a divorce. Get one no matter what, im sure your son would rather have a happy mother than a miserable one, and he will learn too that you cant treat females that way, with that much disrespect. Let your son know that you are not trying to hurt him, but your in dire need of a divore. Your more help to your son happy rather than miserable. :D best of luck
2006-10-22 22:19:25 · answer #5 · answered by shortie_49 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to let go of him. Your child will suffer in different ways depending on the age, but lets try to make him understand that parents will always love him ( I strongly suggest NO tragedies in the house , screaming etc... ) and always speak well about each other. NEVER NEVER talk in front of your child with your husband when you need to discuss about this situation. However, face the fact that your marriage is part of your past. Hug your child and tell him that parents do break up ( you don't need to tell him the reason) but be always kind and smiling . Children hate to see parents in bad moods saying bad words etc.....
This is a tough time but I am sure that you can overcome the situation. Be strong and whenever you feel that you need to speak with someone go to a friend or you can just email me.
2006-10-22 22:25:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing you can do to have it not affect your son unless you want to stay and be miserable just for the sake of your sons happiness but trust me it is not worth it as my parents stayed together until after me and my sister were moved out and on our own, if I had known what my mom had to put up with for all those years I would have told her to get a divorce a long time ago, just do what you have to do and let your son know that it is not his fault and that you still love him
2006-10-22 22:18:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what your son will be affected by this decision. I suggest that you not give up on her husband so fast. Ask him first to move out & provide finicial support for you & your son. I would remain completly seperated up to six months before actually filing... This will lay the foundation for the divorce if it goes before the judge. Once he realize he misses you & your son then select a Therapist to deal with you regarding forgiveness & him regarding his low self esteem. Finally don't forget to pray & ask for God's wisdom, & strength in terms of making the best decisions for you & your family
2006-10-22 23:28:49 · answer #8 · answered by Keepin It Reel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever thought that you can hurt children more by staying in a marriage with bickering and fighting all the time? Stop and think about it. If the marriage is over then take you son and move on. You will be doing both you and your son a favor.
2006-10-22 22:20:16 · answer #9 · answered by classy&sassy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
firstly I am sorry for what you are going/been through but please what ever you do, do not stay with your husband for the sake of your son, it will cause friction that will turn in to arguments between the adults and the child may associate that with him.if your child is old enough sit him down and explain to him the situation as best as you can and ask his thoughts and feelings and keep him informed of whats going on around him through out the divorce.
2006-10-22 22:20:12 · answer #10 · answered by amethyst2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋