my elder brother is having sex with prostitutes, doing every other unfair thing and cheating on his wife badly but she isnt aware of anything and blindly trusts him. She is extremly pretty,100% loyal, loving and caring to my brother and he means the world to her. They got married 3yrs back after their graduation from the same university and were going out for 4yrs before their marriage. She cant even on her wildest dreams think of any such thing happening. My brother plays absolute innocent in front of her and keeps 'lying' taking her sake God's sake and just before his prayers also. If ever my sister-in-law asks anything with a bit of suspect, he starts shouting and breaking things to divert the actual matter and this is one trick that he applies on everything possible. Their married life going fine and sex life smooth. They both are 25yrs.
I discovered my brother's activities but im very scared of telling her as she is very sensitive and might even comit suicide. What should i do?
2006-10-22 20:08:28 · 8 answers · asked by um' add!cted 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It is not your place to tell her. It is your place as his brother to set him right. Nothing more, nothing less. Support her as much as you can, and be there when things go south. They will, eventually.
2006-10-22 20:29:31 · answer #1 · answered by Sugar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your lying cheating brother to the side and tell him he better straighten up or you are going to let her know what is going on. He could get a sexually transmitted disease and pass it on to her. If there are no kids she would be better off without him BUT some women even if they suspect something would rather ignore it rather than be alone. This is a tough one .. start by appealing to him to do the right thing and STOP. If he does then move on .. there is no point in telling her something that she can't do anything about and that will hurt her. If he changes his ways and becomes loyal to her then that is fine .. if not then probably at some point SOMEBODY is going to have to tell her .. maybe you can confide this to her sister or a friend that she trusts who can help her through the pain of divorce...because this is where it will end up probably..
2006-10-22 20:17:01 · answer #2 · answered by MeInUSA 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry to tell y ou this, but you should stay out of it. You could try to talk to him about it, but you could ruin the marriage, and the relationship with your brother, and like you say, cause her a mental breakdown. I think she will have to find out, but the problem is the sex with prostitutes, is it safe?? Talk to your brother and tell him your concerns, also tell it is not safe for his wife, and his temper about it, etc. They might could go to counseling, but it seems to me this marriage is not very good with one cheating, but pray about it and ask God to help them, that is really all you can do, except for talk to your brother and ask him if he thinks he is doing the right thing and also why does he go to prostitutes, etc.? Just play this by ear, if he get really unreasonable, then he might be on drugs, etc., and you might have to think harder about it. You know when people have bad tempers, and women will possibly commit suicide, it is just too complicated for you to be responsible for, if something should happen. Play it by ear for now, but talk to your brother.
2006-10-22 20:16:03 · answer #3 · answered by shardf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt say anything. I would tell my brother it is not right and he should think about his future with her. He should think about his life without her in it. Maybe then he will realize what a good wife he has. But he is your brother and your loyality is with him.
2006-10-22 20:14:05 · answer #4 · answered by Mystie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all does your brother know that you know about it? try talking to your brother first and remind him of the goodness of his wife, and how lucky he is even in the eyes of other people to have her as his wife. you said their marriage life is going smooth anyway, so what she doesn't know wont hurt her.
2006-10-22 20:19:28 · answer #5 · answered by liza f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't tell her but I would make his life difficult, too difficult for him to be wasting time cheating on his wife.
2006-10-22 20:19:21 · answer #6 · answered by Jo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! I think you should stay out of it. It will come out on it's own in the long run. He won't be able to hide this forever; she will find out. Just her find out on her own don't get in the middle.
2006-10-22 20:10:54 · answer #7 · answered by Trinity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your brother you're onto him. Don't tell her.
2006-10-22 20:28:55 · answer #8 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋