i feel like im living with a friend
2006-10-22 16:49:58 · 10 answers · asked by bubby4211 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i feel like im living with my friend im only 22 years old and find all of my riends and family think i get spoken to badly by him i still love him but im not sure im still IN love with him
2006-10-22 17:03:27 · update #1
also i find that im fully dependant on him. and he leves it thrives on it. since ive been with him since i was 16 ive never learnt to be by myself that is what scares me the most. i feel i need to learn to be independant. not wait another 6 years by nearly 30 and have no idea how to depend on myself
2006-10-22 18:44:43 · update #2
QUOTE: "all of my riends and family think i get spoken to badly by him"
If your friends and family think he speaks badly to you, maybe they're seeing something you don't or won't. I suspect that you know exactly what you WANT to do but feel you need permission from others, sort of a validation of what you're feeling.
You don't need permission from anyone to leave a relationship. You don't need a provable, valid reason. You don't need to prove he was a louse or that you were an innocent victim. You only have to do what's in your heart and if your heart tells you its over you don't have to justify your reasons to anyone.The fact that you mention that he speaks badly to you says that you feel he doesn't respect you. Believe me I have been in a relationship where he told me "No stupid, it goes like this...see, you put the jelly on top of the peanut butter THEN close the sandwich"......And I stood for being talked to like I was an idiot, because I believed I didn't deserve better. I worried about a divorce. What would I tell everyone?....I needed a good excuse like he cheated on me.....only he never did, so I stayed for 14 years of feeling like a moron until finally one day I realized, I didn't need any excuse other than I was tired of feeling so bad so I left. That was 25 years ago and I've had a wonderful life since then. I don't allow anyone into my life that makes me feel like I'm "less than"..... So honey, you do what you know you want to do and make no excuses. stop worring about what other people think.
So tell him, " I'll always love you a little, but I gotta move on, SeeYa"....
2006-10-22 18:02:11 · answer #1 · answered by sashia_cali 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just the natural progression of a relationship. Can you really expect the sparks to stay there after you know all there is to know about a person? They mystery is gone. You've settled into a comfortable life together now. This person is probably your BEST friend. Could you give him/her up just for the sake of finding someone new to feel "sparks" again? They'll just go out again and again and again. Look at a fire. It sparks and pops and sizzles in the very beginning but after it's been burning for a while it just silently glows and radiates real warmth. Talk to your partner. Ask him/her how they are feeling about the relationship. Tell them that you would like more passion. If this person loves you he/she should be willing to make changes to save the relationship.
2006-10-22 16:57:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
six years is a very long time. I dont think you should just give up. I just think that the whole romace feeling is just slowed down a lot. I think you should find ways to make it hot again, such as doing daring things, buy some sexy nightys and some whip cream....have a romantic night out. If you still feel nothing at all, than you should talk with him ask him if he would go with you to a consouler and see if yous can fix this, if you think its worth saving. If hes wanting to go as well as yourself than go see how you can fix this, and go from there. If you dont think its worth the time going to one than you need to explain to your partner how you fell and than move on. It better to live your life the way you want than to live a lie, it will only end up hurting both of yous in the end.
2006-10-22 16:55:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you expect to be with someone in a long-term relationship and you have sparks 24/7 you're going to be changing partners a lot.
If everything else is good and you still love each other then you do things to put the spark back and keep it glowing.
Just like everything else in life you get out of it what you put in.
2006-10-22 16:54:56 · answer #4 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships take work. Keeping things hot takes work. If you just give up and move on everytime things get boring, be prepared to do so over and over. Remember...everybody that lives long enough gets old and old people have a tougher time meeting partners that have spark.
2006-10-22 16:55:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you've been with him or her for 6yrs now I'd say hang in there try to spice up things between the 2 of you I'm sure you'll work through this rough time.God Bless You.Good Luck
2006-10-22 16:53:09 · answer #6 · answered by sugarbdp1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there, done that...try to get some sparks back..do something different, or do the things you use to do when there were sparks..you have to work on a relationship, its not easy, you have use your imagination, do something exciting...have some fun....if not, then perhaps its time to move on..
2006-10-22 16:53:37 · answer #7 · answered by Laea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to your partner and if they wont listen write a letter and leave it out after you go 2 work so they will have 2 read it and not interupt you while tring to get your point across then when you get home talk about it at least that way youll be heard. if no results then spilt!!!!
2006-10-22 16:56:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
find that spark again its there just hiding
2006-10-22 16:56:03 · answer #9 · answered by annjilena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cruise-but you should feel lucky that you are living with a friend!!!
2006-10-22 16:52:42 · answer #10 · answered by boilerrat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋