Why do adult men avoid close friendships?

Question

I'm 49. I know this isn't a site to meet people. But I'd like to hear responses from men only who are over 30 years of age. No, I won't ignore anyone else who answers. Please, serious answers only.

Answer 1

M-53 - I have a couple of friends that I can share any of my thoughts with and 3 brothers over 40 who I'm very close with and at least 2 women that I'm not romantically involved with whom I count as close friends also. I don't avoid close relationships its just that there aren't a lot of people in the world that will accept who you are and be honest about themseles at the same time.
It helps if you're comfortable with yourself and responsible for your own happiness. I tend to accept people at face value and try not to hold them up to my own standards.

Answer 2

I'm a 17 year old female. Sorry.

I think that most adult males I know do have a close relationship with somebody else.



I think that some men may avoid close friendships out of fear that they will be labeled as a homosexual. Hate to say this, but I think males tend to be a lot more homophobic than females.

Women tend to be more chatty and talkative then men are. Maybe men feel like this is a sign that they need to be more introverted then women?

Or perhaps it is because they are taught to be independent, and maybe they feel that if they have a close relationship, it would make them weak and insecure?

It also may be this person himself. If he has a mental disorder, he may not want any friends. Or perhaps he's simply just introverted, and would rather keep to himself?

Granted, I'm not a male, but I think that there are several reasonings behind this.

I would have to say this question depends on the individual. Great question, though!

Answer 3

Well, Im almost 29. But for women its generally acceptable to be more gregarious and sociable. More talkative. They can call each other on the phone just to "talk" Men aren't allowed to do that. Its harder to make close frienships among men, especially as you get older. The best way to have a close friendship with another man is to already have been friends with him since you were kids or go to war with him.

Answer 4

Maybe because most of the time friendships don't last forever. They don't want to have a really long relationship you know like have alot of big happy memories and it just goes all down the toilet in like 5 years. Things happen man they maybe don't want to go through all the stress because maybe it's happened to them before like they lost someone or alot of people close to their hearts left them when they least expected it. I think i'm gonna avoid close relationships too because its too much stress and lifes too short to be having alot of stuff on your chest. I'm 16 by the way

Answer 5

Many possible reasons. By this age we are experienced enough to know that opening yourself up to someone, to this deep of a friendship, makes us vulnerable. By this age most of have been "bitten" at least once. Some men are too insecure in their masculinity to show their feelings to their friends. If you look at life and relationships its a cold cruel world out there. By this age most men have just come to grips with that fact and have barriers to protect themselves.

Answer 6

As a woman I would like to know the same thing. Can't wait to see some answers.

Answer 7

In my experience, in life, I have made very close friendships. I would give my life for them. I think they feel the same.
maybe you don't reach out to your friends, or are ther when they kneed you. It is a two way street.

Answer 8

We don't. We have just been around long enough to know that anybody that insists on getting to know you is a psycho or a con artist.

Answer 9

I am a woman and I don't think they do. You can not categorize ALL MEN or ALL women. Everyone is unique. Don't judge

Answer 10

51 here. I for one agree...would like to have closer friends but find it difficult.