Does it sound like my wife is cheating?

Question

I spend a lot of time away from home due to my job.This has been for the14 yrs together 8 c/l and 6 married. Since Feb she has been distant and will not go out with me.When asked what is wrong She brings up things that were said a few years ago.There has never been any abuse. However she seems to go out with her friends when I'm out of town working.I have told her I have no problem with this except that I will call home and get no answer and start to worry. All I asked is she let me know so I don't get concerned. One night she did meet me at a bar to meet some out of country friends that were there. She was pleasant but would not let me touch her and followed every move the male(26YO)bartender made.she is 41 and a stay at home mom. I am 42 we have a 3&5 yr old. this is her second marriage. her first ended when her kids (who I have raised like my own) were 3&5.They are now 17and19. I love her very much, but she will not communicate. She wants a trial sep. but finan. it is not possibl

Answer 1

Listen to "Common Sense" buddy. Find a divorce lawyer ASAP.

Answer 2

Whether she is cheating on you or not is not the problem. The problem is she is unhappy with the situation and something needs to change. If I were you I would say you would agree on a separation only if counseling were involved first by a clergyman (if you were married in a church, find the man or woman that married you) or a trained counselor. If whatever the problem is can't be resolved then at least you could get counseling on the financial ramifications at that time. With no DAD around its very hard to be a stay at home mom. I think you should see if its not too late to be home more and let her see you being a better DAD.

Answer 3

I can not tell she is cheating or not . you can neither. because you don't have any prove , maybe she has some mental problems or she is depressed or some other problem which you don't know.If you wanna find out whether she is cheating on you , you better keep an eye on her for a while. if you did not find anything , then she has got some mental problems or she needs to see a therapist.she needs your support and your attention.Can you take a few days vacation and follow her to see if she has someone else ? If she has nobody , then talk to her and figure out what is her problem... But now , without any prove , you can not just tell she is cheating on you, by the way : has your sexual relationship changed? if yes ,, there is defintily a problem,,,...Good luck

Answer 4

It doesn't sound like she's cheating necessairly. She sounds more like she just wants her space. She might be going through a female mid-life crisis and just wants to see what it's like to be 21 again! I doubt she's having a relationship with the bartender. He's kind of young for her. A trial separation might be good. Why don't you try going out and having fun instead of obsessing? She wouldn't have asked you to meet her a bar if the guy she was sleeping with was there if that makes you feel better.

Answer 5

Yes, I also think that she is cheating on you...or if not already..she has someone in mind. Can I ask how her first marriage ended? I wish that there was something that I could do for you, but there is not. You said that she will not speak to you about what is going on. You are going to have to tell her to come clean and lay it out for you. It is unfortunate that you are out of town much of the time. DO you have anyone that can check things out for you while you are away on business? You may need more information if/when you go to court. Good luck

Answer 6

well my friend, she sounds like the typical milf....I mean come on as a 20 yr old that is what I used to do...go out looking for those hot ladies in their 20s 30s and even 40s that need some love cause thier husband is never home..... If you like taking care of business and you think u got the pants.... take her to a weekend trip and show her how its done... be a little rougher than usual and show your wild side.... That was the most common comment i got from ...ahhh lets say about 20 milfs I been with... ahh he doesnt care he just works and goes out with his friends...so remind her of whos in charge and do her till shes worn out...take a pill if you need to but get the job done brother....cause im 90 percent sure shes got her 20 year old man somewhere, and shes trying to save the energy for him...all my opinion

Answer 7

To be honest it does not sound good no matter if she is cheating on you or not. Watch war of the Roses and you'll understand. Sometimes people just fall out of love or whatever and there is no going back. I would suggest you prepare yourself emotionally for the worst case scenario while hoping for the best.

Suggest marriage counseling. If she balks let her go. It takes two for a relationship to work. No matter how much you love her you can never love enough to make up for her lack.

I sincerely hope things work out for you.

Answer 8

It sounds like that there is a diffinate communication break down between you. I understand that you love her very much. But I believe that even though it may not be financually possible separation maybe the way to go. And alot of it is your job that has driven a wedge between you. When you are away alot you end up loosing the intimicy that you once had.

Answer 9

Sounds like she has resentment issues for whatever happened in the past between you two. Seek counseling. Let her know you care enough to do so. If she is having problems with touching, sex, etc. it may be because she is menopausel/premenopausel and is dealing with effects from that. She may be experiencing depression, physical changes, etc. Sex therapy may help with some of that, combined with a good counselor/therapist that you both feel comfortable with.
Good luck.

Answer 10

Sometimes she needs something to hold other than a telephone. She might want out, but she probably has someone on the side when you are not around and doesn't really want to leave since you probably pay for everything.

You guys need to sit down and have a very serious talk.

Answer 11

Personally I think she is cheating. Seperate how ever you have to, since she is cheating endeavour to get proof but do not insist on catching her in the act, cicumstantial will do. I would make the break and not provide her any financial support other than what is required for the children, insist on taking it to court and when there make it clear that this is Her desire and that you think she is cheating, put her on the stand and under oath put the question to her.