I recently checked our history on our computer, (we are the only ones using it besides our 7 year old son on occasion). I found sites for male underwear models, erotic male pictures, nude males and male enhancing underwear. We don't have a very active sex life but we work opposite shifts. Now I am a little worried and I'm not sure how to approach him about it. We have 2 children and have been married almost 8 years. I have never known him to have much of a libido but I thought that was just him. Is this a normal thing for men to do? I didn't find any sites that showed pictures of females. I also asked him if he had anyone over that day just to make sure on of his female friends hadn't used our computer. he said he was alone. I'm just looking for another persons perspective. I don't want to ask friends or family.
2006-10-22 04:31:54 · 14 answers · asked by shell 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Don't have any "answer" in your mind yet while U didn't ask to your husband at the first place.Don't think or any silly before U have the talk with him.Try find out the reason behind him move.Sometimes things just go on like U thought.
2006-10-22 18:57:25
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answer #1
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answered by hAPPY 4
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(",)Just sit down and have the conversation with him.Make the talk as soon as possible.The faster U start
You have good cause to be worried - particularly as you say he is not exactly bringing home the bacon in the bedroom for you. I suspect he is gay rather than bisexual - if he was the latter you would be having more fun.
There could; however slim; be a perfectly rational explanation.
You are in a difficult situation. Do you really want to know the truth? Are you prepared to turn your life upside down? This will surely be the consequence of confronting it, and you may feel it is the right thing to do.
If you do decide to keep quiet, you then have the worry that if he is active with other males he may contract something and pass it on to you.
I do not envy you one little bit.
2006-10-22 05:08:12 · answer #2 · answered by steven b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
now your sure that it was him and not one of the kids? and it could very well be that you husband is bi. or he may even be gay. it is not uncommon for gay or bi men to marry and have children. they do this because they don't want to believe that they are and also that their family and friends don't find out that they are. if this concerns you why not ask him about it? you can just tell him that you came across it just as you did, and ask him why he has been looking at nude men. reassure him that he can tell you anything that you love him and that you will do your best to understand what ever it is that's going on, but that he needs to talk to you and be open and honest with you.
2006-10-22 04:47:18 · answer #3 · answered by here to help 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You better make a decision before you approach him. Break up the marriage, or play dumb. If you aren't worried about sex, let him have his fun, he's BI, or maybe gay; but life can go on if you wish.
If you push it or can't deal with it, then it's all done but the Big D.
Male 2 male sex is just too easy to get, you can't stop him if that's what he wants, it's everywhere; and the % of married men would surprise you. If it hasn't affected your marriage to this point, chances are it won't. Click to clear history after each use.
2006-10-22 04:38:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I was thinking maybe he feels he doesn't measure up and was comparing himself with other males. I know a married male who got caught up in looking at male porn and he is NOT gay at all. Porn is a downward spiral and this guy started by looking at "normal" woman porn and went from there. I have looked at female porn and am so not a lesbian. You really need to sit down with your husband when you two won't be interupted and discuss this. I hope for your families sake that he's straight.
2006-10-22 05:31:57 · answer #5 · answered by me 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you're in htis situation. It really does sound like he's gay. Men do have some fantasies, but not to that extent and it sounds like he's been trying to keep it from you so he feels guilty about it. Try to approach it as gently as you can and if it turns out he is gay, make every effort to end your marriage on good terms. It's probably the case that he couldnt help how he feels and really does love you, bus his true feelings lie elsewhere. I hope you can resolve this in the bests interests of all of you. Good luck.
2006-10-22 04:58:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like your hubby is in the closet. Embarrassed by the fact he is gay and married a woman and had kids to try to ease the tension in his mind. Be nice about it, he may be sensitive, and ask him about the gay porn. I don't agree with homosexuality, but if that's the way he is, then that's the only way he'll be happy. You ain't the first gal this has happened to. Get a friendly divorce. Let him be who he is. He can see the kids if he really loves them (but only if he loves them).
Oh, and tell him to not get in those dumb parades. They clog up traffic too bad.
2006-10-22 04:39:51 · answer #7 · answered by unclewill67 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, this is not normal behavior. You should find the courage to speak with him about this, as it not only affects your relationship with him, but it may also impact your children if he in fact has a problem. Good, honest communciation is needed here.
2006-10-22 07:24:03 · answer #8 · answered by Butter Bean 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont really know what to tell you except that i dont think its "normal" for a man to look at male pics unless he is gay. i guess you'll never know the truth unless you ask right? good luck.
2006-10-22 04:45:49 · answer #9 · answered by Btieti 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
maybe he is just looking for some new underwear? But ummm no he's gay or bi
2006-10-22 04:38:54 · answer #10 · answered by t 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋