I had a miscarriage on June 23, 2005 at 14 weeks, and it was the most emotionally and physically painful experience I've ever had in my entire life. I was 36 years old at the time, was not planning on having another child, but wound up pregnant. When I m/c, I was devestated (and it's still hard to deal with at times). The doctors and pathology report never could say with any certainty why I m/c, but I know that my baby son was perfect. So it must have been something about my body that did not allow him to develop to term. Well, I found out today that I'm pregnant. I don't know how to deal with it. I want to be happy, but all I can think about is loosing this baby too. How can I stop being so full of fear and dread, and start feeling the usual excitement of pregnancy and motherhood and new baby?
2006-10-21 19:29:48 · 9 answers · asked by sciteach9 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
SOmetimes things don't happen TO you, but rather FOR you. You don't know for certain if your m/c baby was perfect or not. I am sure it's easier for you to deal with to think it was perfect, but that may not be accurate. You need to take care of youeself. quit focusing on what's wrong and bad, and start focusing on what's right and good. If you dwell on the negative, or have anxiety about the possible, it may be self-fulfiling. Forgive yourself and move on. Your body doesn't need the stress right now. Exercise and take your prenata; vitamins, eat right and get enough rest. Your unborn child is depending on you. And don't stress out and force your unborn child to deal with adult issues. Think into the future, about diapers and training wheels, teething and first steps. Thise are the things you need to prepare yourself for, not some nightmare. Whether you think this will be successful or not, you will be right.
Take care!
2006-10-21 19:44:51 · answer #1 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand the heartache of a m/c. I had a miscarriage July 4, 2005. I was only 8 weeks along though. I had already been to the Dr two weeks earlier and everything seemed normal except that the sac was a bit small. I had weird symptoms with that pregnancy too, like a backache that seemed to start as soon as the baby was conceived. Now, I don't know the exact reason I m/c my baby, but I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. I had a 6 month old at the time, I was between jobs and we had a pile of bills. We weren't ready for a baby at that time. After the m/c, I was very distraught as my husband and I had already come to terms with having kids so close in age. I ended up getting pregnant again two months later, and now have a healthy 6 month old baby boy.
My point is, there are lots of women out there that have had a m/c, and more than likely it wasn't anything due to what she did or didn't do. From what my Dr. told me, something like 25% of pregnancies end up in m/c. Alot of times, the woman doesn't even know it happened. Please allow yourself to be happy. Sometimes, you just have to focus on the future, and not allow what has happened in the past to run your life. Good luck, and take care.
2006-10-21 21:29:24 · answer #2 · answered by Stacy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I completley understand what you are going through as I've had two miscarriages. You just need to take your steps daily and everyday you are ok, just say to yourself I'm ok today!
They usually say that you are most likely to miscarry at 8 weeks so you could always request an early scan.
Try not to worry I know it's hard because you feel like you can't get excited about your pregnancy, but I'm sure you will be fine. x
2006-10-21 23:12:20 · answer #3 · answered by vanessa s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i miscarried my first baby in march 06and now my second one is due in march 07, so i'm 21 weeks. up until about a week ago i couldn't bond with the baby and was actually depressed i was pregnant because i feared losing this one too.
so how do u deal with it? treat pregnancy like a medical condition until u can deal with it. eat healthy, exercise, take ur vitamins but dont' think about the baby. it sounds harsh but it worked for me. i felt the baby kick a week ago and had an ultrasound that said he was a boy. i'm actually happy about it now.
i hope i dont lose him too but i dont' want to miss out on the bonding because i'm afraid i'll lose him too
2006-10-22 02:30:19 · answer #4 · answered by confused mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry that you m/c. I couldn't even begin to imagine how you felt. All you can do is be hopeful that this one will last. I really can't tell you how though. Good luck and I wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy.
2006-10-21 19:39:00 · answer #5 · answered by guineasomelove 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi just found out had a misscarriage yeterday is it ok to still grieve? i am so happy to hear your news u should think positive i would i know its hard but the chances r very slim to have a mc againx
2006-10-21 23:42:32 · answer #6 · answered by MEGAN 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is normal,it does not matter if you had MC before or not, everyone is worry to lose thier little one.
But it wil not help you, so just try to relax. take yoga classes, and talk with your Dr about it.
and trust God, he knows the best...
Wish you all the luck ( you will be fine )
2006-10-21 19:55:40 · answer #7 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't think about the negatives. Think about the positives. Just be happy that you're having a baby! YAY!!!!!
2006-10-21 19:32:53 · answer #8 · answered by youngandinlove. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be strong and confront your fear with no doubts and no worries; conquer your fear.
2006-10-21 19:37:33 · answer #9 · answered by BUDDY LUV 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋