My husband has two small children with his ex-wife 5ys and 7ys. He's beed divorced for 4 yr. He was the one to leave. The problem is after all this time his ex-wife is still bitter towards me and no i did not have a affair with her husband. Every chance she gets she downs me to his family freinds and anyone else that will listen. But what really bothers me the most is the fact she calls my husband all the time for little stuff and is sweet as can be to him. Yes i understand they have 2 small children together and they have to have some contact but my question is what is normal for divorced couples.My husband says im overreacting and he only talks to her about the kids. This may be true but she calls over everything from the children geting a runny nose to their looking at each other the wrong way on almost a daily bases.I believe she does this to keep tabs on us and my husband says i'm crazy. Is it normal for divorced couples who went thur a very bitter divorce to have daily contact?
2006-10-21 17:11:17 · 18 answers · asked by sarah96 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No it is not normal. They should not talk every day no matter what. Only time they need to be in contact with each other is to find out when he is to get the kids, unless that is already set up and it should be. And then the only other time is if one of the kids get sick. Does he ever talk to her behind your back or is it only when you are around? He needs to stop talking to her that much any way you want to look at it. How would he like it if the shoe was on the other foot...you was talking to your ex every day "about the kids"?
2006-10-21 17:24:34 · answer #1 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you definetly have a right to feel the way you do. No it is not normal for them to have daily contact, and plus your husband should respect your feelings about the matter rather then just passing them off. Now its true that they may only be talking about the kids and she may want him in there lifes as much as possible but is going about it the wrong way. I think you need to sit down and have a serious conversation with your husband and explain your feelings an concerns to him, if he loves you he will respect your feelings and talk to her. You shouldnt feel uncomfortable with the contact between your husband and his ex and if you do then its because he makes you feel shut out of the situation when in reality your stuck right in the middle. Talk to him, explain your position and how you feel. good luck.
2006-10-21 17:19:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
oh please, my boyfriend abandoned me for no reason at all, he left me for thin air, and your husband can't commit after he gave you a ring? men with children are pathetic, he should be lucky someone even wants him and his baggage, divorce him monday morning when the courts open before you get knocked up too. get out while you can. i have been the "other woman" had the guy tell me he couldn't stop speaking to his last woman because it would hurt her. what about me? he is obviously still in love with her b/c he doesn't care it would hurt YOU. tell him it's over and all phone calls have to go through you or you're leaving. then what will he do? what will the woman do when she can only talk to you? she will be horrified! then you can make comments about her breath and her body fat, then she will soon loose interest in calling. all calls go through you, or divorce, period!
2006-10-21 17:29:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am in the same situation. The only difference is his daughter is 18 yrs old....her mum keeps calling over and over about the daughter's whereabouts and it really pisses me off...the girl is an adult...she has his number and can call him herself...this has been happening for 4 yrs and thats how long we have been married....my husband carries on talking with that woman....today I told him...if he needs to be there...then he can leave me and our children...since I am really tired of him hitting me for these nasty horrid people whom he still wants in his life.
2006-10-21 17:18:47 · answer #4 · answered by ♥♥♥GODDESS♥♥♥ 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It takes 2 to tangle, in case you refuse to correctly known the adverse and concentration on the constructive, you could impact the habit of the boy's mom. don't be egocentric via in basic terms thinking how this might influence you and your relationships with your husband and step son. A boy needs his mom close to. embody his needs and appreciate his humanity, in spite of everything this occasion exchange into no longer his selection. little ones are human beings too. in case you invite his mom on your city with open palms and a real heart, you could heal the injuries of the previous. via the way, how might desire to you stop her from shifting there? attempt to no longer take this harshly besides the indisputable fact that it variety of feels you have administration subject concerns and a minimum of portion of the situation is you. Be the final you could and continually love unconditionally, in case you do, you would be his hero.
2016-10-15 07:07:08 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i hear you! no matter what you do the ex will always be in your husband's life....BUT! your husband needs to shout her off a bit!! and no you aren't overreacting,,,,i had the same problem i stuck through this for 9 yrs..and the youngest is 12 now, so it's less know...but we as new wifes have to sacrifice a lot....There is going ot be times that you would rather call it quits and leave...but hang in there,,don't let the ex win! good luck and be strong...
2006-10-21 17:21:43 · answer #6 · answered by guess 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sometimes its normal to have in contact after the divorce just for the sake of the childrens, but If you think that she is doing it just to annoyed you, I reckon you need to do something about it. You need to tell your husband what you think about what she is doing and talk about it..
2006-10-21 17:21:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You knew this guy had "baggage" before you married him, if you had problems coping with it then you should not have married him. There are no "normals" when it comes to human relationships. Either you learn to not let his ex wife get to you or you will be miserable throughout your entire marriage.
2006-10-21 22:07:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex and I didn't even marry, let alone divorce and our break up was messy, we have one child. We talk every week or so, nowhere near everyday. And our conversations are very to the point.
2006-10-21 17:15:28 · answer #9 · answered by devilUknow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be normal, in a way, you should be glad that he cares about his kids that much. I think in a way its kinda good b/c the kids need both parents in their lives. However, I do understand where you are coming from. Try not to let it get to you, she's probably doing it more b/c she knows it bothers you. Lighten up and act like you could care less, she'll get bored and not bother you so much.
2006-10-21 17:15:40 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋