Effeminate gay men: innate or learned?

Question

To gay people:

I know full well gay men are born this way, and so on, but I always wondered: are *effeminate* gay men born this way, or is it something they learn by hanging around other men like this. I mean is that specific expression of gayness due to nature or nurture?

Answer 1

Born taht way...and I swear I have seen little boys acting like girls and it is so obvious that they are gay. I remember having classmates when I was 7 that were effeminate and they are gay and MORE effeminate now.

Answer 2

Either born that way or learned it very early in life. Some gays are not at all effeminate acting, but some are so effeminate they can't hide it. Those were always the kids who caught the most harassment when I was growing up. Hopefully, things are changing for the better.

Answer 3

Let me put it this is way: I think the effeminate acting part is definitely an innate personality trait. And not just a few gay men have this trait either, some bisexuals and straight men also act effeminate. I do not believe a boy can be taught to be effeminate.

Answer 4

I think some effeminate gay men overdo it. You see that when someone is slightly effeminate and then they come out of the closet and they are wide open. I don't think it is natural for someone to call a guy girl. But some gay men do it to each other. Different strokes for different folks.

Answer 5

I think it depends on the person. There are certainly some who are born to be more feminine, such as those who have been showing signs since they were toddlers. It is the same with lesbians and the dyke sterotype. Many have been boyish their entire lives, foiling all expectations from whatever family happens to exist in their lives.
However, there are also grounds for the nurture arguement, making it difficult to choose one as right, and forcing the other to be wrong.
I personally, in my entire world view, am one of those who says that declaring people's social and emotional developments, ANY person's development, as being either nature or nurture, would be to limit possibilities and considerations. I think that in almost every situation, it is a combination that creates the final result.

Answer 6

I would have to lean towards born that way only because I have seen more than my fair share of effeminate heterosexual men. It's only anecdotal but I'm sure I'm not the only one who has seen this. I myself am considered a masculine gay man, voice, appearance etc. I just always was this way.

Answer 7

Definately born that way. Several of my gradeschool mates who turned out to be gay were very effeminate way back then; before gays were out of the closet and certainly before they understood their own sexuality.

Answer 8

I believe it is learned friends who were like all of us who early in their life had no Father or masculine figure to follow only sisters,and a Mother would ultimately turn out that way however only a fraction of them were into other guys,whereas more of the bullies,and jocks were apt to be either bi or gay or something in between something like a G0y sorta.

Answer 9

I have always been effeminate. I began dressing in girls clothing way before i even knew what sex was about

Answer 10

personality is developed by the surroundings, no one is born with a fixed personality.
so no, gay men aren't born that way, but they got inclination towards it, depends on the person and in what conditions he grew up in