Drinking with parents/kids?

Question

Got to thinking of this. I recently opened a beer in front of my dad which quickly led to an argument of epic perportions. I tried to point out to my dad that I am 36 and a bit over the age of concent. He pointed out he didn't care and threatened to spank me. Anyway, looking at my son now I am thinking I will probably respond the same way of the situation arises.

So my question is what are the ethics on partying with your parents or kids. My dad threw me a curve and did a surprise visit otherwise I probably would have never opened a beer in front of him. I could never see myself drinking with my son. But I know of people who actually do just that.

10 points to the most thought provoking answer. I put it here because I think this is an ethical question.

My dad is 70 in case yall want to know.

Answer 1

I suppose if he drinks but thinks you should not or at least should not in front of him, it is perceived to him like masturbation. He does it, you do it, but don't do it in front of him. It makes him ashamed for some reason. He is too old to tell him to go to hell so love him and drink up when he is not around. Or you could go to counseling and REALLY get to the bottom of it all, maybe stir up a lot of imaginary mental stuff. You know, really keep the economy going.

My advice, honestly, is respect his quirk, he is old, is not going to change, drinking is not that important anyway.

You are still a man, he is your father. You can't pick your own dad.

I don't care about the points so just enjoy my frankness.

Answer 2

i think it is wrong for parents to party with their kids however if the kids are over 21 and they want to have a drink I would say it depends on how they were raised. my family is Italian and they have always drank wine with dinner, and still do. If i am eating they will walk up and bring me a drink, or all of the kids in the family who are old enough to drink do. I would not get drunk, pass out or puke, but a few drinks yes.
Now on to your case, Obviously it bothers your dad, so in that case i would say no, after all he is still your dad, i think it is a matter of respect, whether he is right or wrong.
I think i might feel awkward drinking with my daughter(when she is old enough), if i had a son it might be different, but i would rather she drinks with me than friends that way i could protect her, when she or a son was 36 i might feel a little different

Answer 3

Well, it might be an ideal world if no one drank. however, back to reality, people do drink. I would hope to never see my kids drink, I do not. If they were of age and not getting drunk but just having a beer, especially in their own home, I can express my opinion but it is not my place to threaten.

Dad needs to remember who is paying your bills, unless he is providing a roof over your head and paying your bills, he really does not have much to say about it.

Be fair to your child though and have this conversation with them that you do not want to see them drinking and you do not want to be around them when they drink. This may not make sense to them when they think about you drinking. I am sure you do not want your child having the same feelings you are feeling now.

Good luck!

Answer 4

While I do believe you father went a bit ok more then a bit overboard in this situation, my mother has a very harsh view on drinking and will not allow it her home or anywhere near her (granted this was with good reason as her mother was an alcoholic as was her 2nd husband who later died of liver failure)
But in your case as long as your not totally wasted in your childs company then I see no reason for his reaction. you seem to be a rational adult and it is your home. As far as your child goes I would say when he is in his latter teens and he wants to experiment i would say have him do it in your home at least that way you can stop him from doing stupid things and be there to help if he has too much.

Answer 5

If you are serious, I think this is ridiculous! You are 36 years old. Your father should be able to handle your drinking. I'm 19 and I've split beers with my father! I'm assuming you are American, because in no other country would such a question be asked. I am little confused though because you seem to equate drinking a beer to partying. I would find it odd to "party" with my parents, but having the occasional beer with them? please! Now, about drinking with your son: I don't reccommend you drink with him until he's in his late teens. I think even though it's illegal for you to give him alcohol, you should. It will create a better sense of responsible drinking and will take much of the mystery out of drinking.

Answer 6

Im 15, and on each and every occasion i see my mothers and fathers eating a splash too lots it makes me never choose to drink! Haha its unlike they are below the impact of alcohol however the get so annoying! So it relies upon on what you probably did whilst your little ones observed you and the way previous they are! I say pass convey regret and admit you have been incorrect and that they shouldnt incredibly attempt it even inspite of the indisputable fact which you probably did, wish i helped :)

Answer 7

sounds to me that your Dad is very controlling. I think he bully's you. You don't need his approval for anything. You need to have more confidence in your own judgment and don't worry what your Dad thinks. Partying in one thing but if you make drinking seem wrong then your kids will want to do it more..People in other countries drink with their children at meals and don't make a big deal about it..

Answer 8

Back when I used to drink, I never drank in front of my parents. I can't tell you why. They drank and knew that I drank but I just didn't drink in front of them. By daughter drank a few times in her life but never in front of me. Now no one in my family drinks

Answer 9

hmmm quite grown up but unless someone has a drinking problem i really don't see the fuss. you are right about partying with parents and kids - it should not be done unless both are willing

Answer 10

well its strange for the first time but you and your dad will get use to it just chill with him and your 36 i dont think it matters you do what you want to do.