I was with a guy for 5 years, since freshman year in high school. we broke up recently for 8 months..and kinda were on and off..Lets just say i broke his heart already once..and I decided a couple of weeks ago that i wanted to work things out again..For some reason though I already feel like its not..I just dont feel the same way about him as i did.. Now i dont know what to do, because if i break up with him i know he willl say the same things as he did last time. which was that he will kill him self and he threatens me. I dont know what to do..I dont want to be with him, but im to scared to break up! please help
2006-10-21 11:39:24 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I had a long term boyfriend in high school who threatened the same thing. He is trying to control you with fear, because he knows that you still care for him and would blame yourself if he did harm to himself. Its a horrible and sick thing to do to someone. However, you have to remember this is YOUR life. You care about him, but he is NOT the one who is going to make you happy. There is always a chance he might hurt himself to get your attention (mine never did) but you cannot let this control you. He is going to have to get help on his own. Hopefully he will realize that both of you are young and are going in separate directions. Most people dont stay with their highschool sweetheart. He is in control of his own future- not yours. And any bad decision he makes will only hurt himself. Stay strong and move on! You will be so much happier.
2006-10-21 11:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by AGNY 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to do what is best for you. You are afraid of him, do you really want to be afraid of your boyfriend? You two have been together for so long and have so many memories together that it is hard to put all that in the past and realize that you don't love each other anymore. I'm sure that is part of his problem too, he can't get over all that time you spent together. Talk to him about how you feel, that you wanted to get back together and work things out but you just don't think you can. It may open his eyes about how he feels towards you.
2006-10-21 11:50:04 · answer #2 · answered by BLANK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you really aren't in not in love anymore break up with him because than he will get the wrong idea. The longer you wait,the harder it will be to break up with him and if the threats continue you should seek help from a person who trust and if that doesn't work go to the police, don't let him manipulate you stand up for yourself so you can have what u want in life!!!!!!
good luck!!!
Manda
{and if you need any more help you can e-mail me}
peace<3
2006-10-21 11:54:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're already THIS scared...how scared will you be in a year...two years...? Imagine having kids with someone like that and he manipulates them the same way. If he does kill himself...then it sounds like he's got more problems than you in his life but you can't be responsible for HIS actions!!
2006-10-21 11:43:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to control you. If you want to leave and you allow him to manipulate you into not leaving, he will continue to do so for the rest of the time you are with you. You will be miserable. Just make sure you are not alone when you break up with him.
2006-10-21 11:43:34 · answer #5 · answered by lady01love 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is not right to carry on a relationship that causes you pain. And you can't be held responsible for the actions of another person. Head up, shoulders back... you know what to do, now go and do it.
2006-10-21 11:43:04 · answer #6 · answered by mJc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You cannot be forced to have feelings for someone, and you shouldn't allow this person to emotionally blackmail you into a relationship.
Try to convince him to seek therapy. Talk to his family and tell them. But at the end of the day - you are NOT responsible for his actions. Tell him that you hope that he doesn't do anything rash, but that you will not be made to feel responsible for his actions.
2006-10-21 11:42:54 · answer #7 · answered by cathy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he is manipulating you- and if you allow him he will keep doing it- he did not go through with it the first time- but if you really think he will- get him some help- friends-freaks- cops whatever you can- but get away from him if you feel that strongly about it- and it also sounds like you are trying to Fix his problems by being there for him- you can not fix him- get away------
2006-10-21 11:47:10 · answer #8 · answered by drox 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people who say these things are doing one of two things...one, they're manipulating you into staying with them or...two, they're using you as a reason to do what they're already thinking about doing. if there is no feeling in the relationship for you, you need to walk. you aren't doing him or yourself any favors by standing aroudn.
2006-10-21 11:42:25 · answer #9 · answered by kajunprincezz 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This guy is pond Scum. Oh Wait a minute, pond scum has a purpose. He is manipulative and abusive. get far away from him. If he has threaten you . you had better report him to the police. you are young don't get bog down with this lowlife. Tell your parents also.
2006-10-21 11:44:47 · answer #10 · answered by Agnon L 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋