My very dear friend passed away last night and our sons are best buddies, they play sports together, go to school together, we do things together as families, etc. I am not sure if it is appropriate to allow my son to attend his friend's mother's funeral. I do not want it to traumatize him but we have told him that she passed away and he was aware that she was sick, he wants to go and see his friend. Do you think there would be any harm in letting him attend, however, I do not want him to see the body. Your input is greatly appreciated! Thanks
2006-10-21 10:58:20 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
We all have to deal with death at some point.I think that since you are gonna be there it gives your son a chance see what happens without it being so first hand.He can comfort his friend and see that you still go on.I know he is probably more aware of whats going on than you think.I would definitely ask him if he wished to go.My brother died and my kids were really close to him. I have a boy 16, boy 14, girl 9.It was a healthy thing for them to attend and say goodbye. My 9 year old got up and spoke to all the people at the funeral.She shared some of her favorite memories.My boys said a thing or two also.It was the first tragic death to me at 35 and they had to do it early.My kids went to the coffin and said some thing to him.I kept talking to him also.I think they all thought I had lost my mind.I was there to represent who he was.I did good,he helped me,I know it
2006-10-21 11:06:48 · answer #1 · answered by kelliekareen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not only allow him to go, but go with him! He is going to have a lot of questions. Explain that this is the cycle of life and one day everyone will pass away. Death is a natural process. He should be allowed to view the body. Don't try to treat it as a horrible thing because that will confuse him. Just be there with him and he will let you know when he is ready to leave.
2006-10-21 11:02:50 · answer #2 · answered by tko43078 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, i do no longer think of you have been off base in any respect. except your neighbor is a finished fool, she is conscious precisely what she exchange into doing--asking you to babysit for unfastened. It exchange into extraordinarily thoughtless, much extra so thinking your being pregnant. As on your son, you probable in simple terms might desire to tell him the fact: which you like he might desire to play with the neighbor boy, yet which you will no longer have tough play, extremely related to kicking the dogs, at your living house of living, and that the boy's mommy does not understand that it is not superb to deliver little ones over uninvited. i'm constructive you have already seen this, yet are you able to inspire your son to locate a clean buddy? possibly you could kind appropriate habit on your son via calling yet another newborn's mom and welcoming the newborn over from, say, 2-4 pm. Then consistent with threat the different mom will invite your son over and he will see how the play date ingredient is meant to paintings. ultimate of success to you--i understand that is not basic!
2016-10-15 06:48:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son is telling you that he is ready. If he knew your friend well he needs to say goodbye to her. His instinct that he needs to see his friend comes from love and should be respected. As for seeing the body you should follow his lead once both of you are there. If he feels he needs or wants to, be there for him and stay close over the next few days to answer his questions and reassure him. Kids are far tougher than we give them credit for. Just don't make him follow though if he changes his mind.
2006-10-21 11:07:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anna W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to sit him down and talk to him.does he only want to go to support his friend?or does he want to go to pay respect to the passed woman and friend?if he wants to see the body and pay his respects,i don't think you should stop him,death is a part of life,afterall.it's a life lesson,don't make him fear this natural part of EVERYONE'S life.the way you treat this situation could affect the way he feels from now on about friends passing.think this through before you act,it's important.
2006-10-21 11:04:59 · answer #5 · answered by tinaluvsglass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to your son abouyt what happened and what will happen and ask him what he wants to do it will help his friend very much for him to be there. I think if you talk to him and give him a choice it will help a lot and as long as you are there for him I think it will be just fine. I am sure this is hard for everyone
2006-10-21 11:03:41 · answer #6 · answered by melthule 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should. He should learn about the pain of death and its effects while he's young so he can learn to cope with it. Plus I think his friend needs him right now. Just don't let him look into the coffin.
2006-10-21 11:02:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should go there with him and make sure he doesn't see the body or anything. Usually your friends pain is your pain so you should let him go to help his friend through with the pain.
2006-10-21 11:02:29 · answer #8 · answered by Tay 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes children need to understand life and death also./
2006-10-21 11:01:12 · answer #9 · answered by Lynne B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you should let him! that way he can support his friend in a time of need let them do sleepover n' stuff!
2006-10-21 11:08:58 · answer #10 · answered by Danielle K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋