I have been getting calls from a lady i used to work with, we were never close friends just collegues. We have never seen each other outside of work. She retired and moved away, she has little family and no friends i am aware of, but now is calling me to talk nearly every day. I dont want to be rude to her, but how do i tell her that i have other things I need to be doing than talking on the telephone? I think she is lonely.
2006-10-21 04:14:51 · 9 answers · asked by missie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It sounds like she is looking for a friend. She must have thought highly of you. That's nice. Maybe you could find time to be a friend in some small way. If you could help her get involved in some groups that would be a way for her to make new friends too. Some people don't know how to find their way without a little help. There's the Pink hatters for ladies under 50 and the red hatters for ladies over 50. They are a blast. Lot's of those ladies are single too. Just a thought. Good luck.
2006-10-21 04:20:18 · answer #1 · answered by Night Wind 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
caller i.d. don't answer it.
and why not tell her the truth? or rather, a portion of the truth. say... "i'm sorry. i'm so busy i simply don't have time to talk on the phone to anyone these days. i really have alot to do and while i really enjoy hearing from you, i'm going to have to start forcing myself to get busy. maybe you could call me next week and i could chat for a couple minutes."
that should do it. and it isn't rude like my first option. but it is an option...
this woman sounds like she is simply alone, lonely and just reaching out. i would remember, if i were you, that you might be in her postion someday and would want someone to take some time to be your friend. what goes around, comes around.
the housework, etc. will always be there tomorrow. people won't.
2006-10-21 11:17:11 · answer #2 · answered by annie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In all honesty, there is no "unrude" way to do it. Anything you say along those lines will hurt her feelings. You have a few choices (some are going to be lies but sometimes you need to to protect others). Write her a letter (sometimes the truth is easier on paper...change your phone number (you say she's moved away so you won't have to explain anything if you ran into her)...block her phone number (a feature offered by bellsouth-but very rude)...tell her your moving and you will get in contact with her when you're settled...the list goes on. Just be creative (and pray for forgiveness).
2006-10-21 11:26:02 · answer #3 · answered by shellese2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one way to tackle the problem is to remedy the cause.
in this case, some time and effort now could work out in a pleasing way.
find out which community organisations are active in her area, you could websearch or call the branches near you.
the idea being to find her some company .. or community groups she could join.
she could do volunteer work, or babysitting, or visit lonely people in nursing homes.
help her to meet people and make friends.
then get caller ID. at least you won't feel guilty about avoiding some of her calls!
2006-10-21 11:24:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get caller ID and only answer her calls once a week. But be kind and call her back from time to time. Remember, what goes around comes around. You might be in her position in the future.
2006-10-21 11:20:49 · answer #5 · answered by eightieschic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just limit yourself to answering her calls to once a week . Take that time for her if she is lonely.We all need someone & you may be someone that she feels comfortable talking to.
2006-10-21 11:20:22 · answer #6 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her you are busy and can't talk every time she calls, she will soon get the hint...
2006-10-21 11:17:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her the truth - nicely. "Sorry ..... I have to go now to do xyz" - it will take a while but she will get the hint.
2006-10-21 11:20:35 · answer #8 · answered by d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her I'm sorry but I'm busy I'll talk to you later
2006-10-21 11:30:34 · answer #9 · answered by kim g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋