I've been always "straight". Dating, and getting it with women. But I felt I had some type of attraction towards men too since I started reliazing what sex is. Nevertheless, I never acted upon it, and ignored it for a long time, supressed it . Now when I came to college, got more involved with male friends, and even saw them undressed, and more importantly had a larger community than school,my hormones began to do their work. And now I find myself so much attracted and curious for a relationship with another guy. I'm confused, although I liked the company of women, but it seems to me that "I had my share of it", and wanna go for it with a guy. Have I been through 7-8 years bi and supressing my attraction to men, or was I gay but "going with the flow"? And should I now start dating men and forget females? Guide me please to the first steps in this, I'm somewhat "Old-New" at this!
2006-10-21 01:29:40 · 12 answers · asked by Jim W 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
First off all, relax, almost everyone goes through something like this at some point in their life. I wish I could tell you if you were bi, gay or going through a phase, but these things are never easy or so straightforward. Take it from one who knows. If you are interested in a relationship with a guy it might be an experimental thing or you might be bisexual. I resist jumping right to gay because I did that and that confused me more than helped me, others might disagree with me on that account. If you are serious about wanting to date a guy then go for it, the only way you will know for certain is when you try. Just do what feels natural for you and don't let ANYONE force you into anything you don't 100% want to do. I hope my answer helps.
Good luck and just be yourself!
2006-10-21 01:56:03 · answer #1 · answered by Redd Morgan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's time for you to walk through your fear and date some guys anyway. You could be bisexual and just haven't experienced the other side. Or, like me, you could be gay and are going with the flow. I know what you mean by "going with the flow". I even got married. I did love the girl, but I was only 20 and hadn't had any sexual experience with men yet.
Your school or community should have gay / lesbian / bisexual clubs. Find a friend there and talk about what you're going through. They've either been in your shoes or are in them now.
I don't suggest the 'bar scene' at this stage.
You'll just end up getting drunk and sleeping with people you'll never see again.
2006-10-21 08:41:50 · answer #2 · answered by Jake 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would reiterate again that you've probably always been gay but played the dating game with women because it was expected of you. Maintain friendships with women this can still be very rewarding. Try a male relationship, but start slow and as always protect yourself..both health and heart wise. I always say, look for love. True love knows no gender. Some day you will find the right person for you, be they male or female. You have the whole population to explore and all the time in the world. Relax. And good luck.
2006-10-21 09:38:48 · answer #3 · answered by truckinotter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice is that you are just a bit confused. It reallly sounds to me like you are straight. You have been flirting with the idea of men though and thats what has gotten you confused.
Stick to women, it is natural, easier and meant to be that way. In the future you will thank your lucky stars you did. Otherwise i think you will regret it. Especially when you get to that stage later where you want to settle down with someone, have children etc. You may not think that time will come - but it does. And how will you feel when you need to be honest to this person you are considering marrying and you have to tell her that you have slept with men.
Anyway theres a lot involved obviously. But whatever you do - the best advice is
DONT DO ANYTHING UNLESS YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY SURE AND COMFORTABLE WITH IT.
best of luck
2006-10-21 08:51:08 · answer #4 · answered by Nic 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are seeking validation by asking this question. I don't know you.
I can not answer this question. Nobody here can.
You will know which path to take as you meet new people. Trust your instinct. This is a scenario where you can't apply logic or expect a right/wrong answer.
Why do you seek to label yourself, especially so young? Slow down. Observe. Experiment. Trust your intuition. Go with what FEELS 'normal' for YOU. Find your own normal.
Don't set yourself a time limit on this one. Have fun. You will know when you're ready to know. Not knowing right now is not your fault, and not a problem.
2006-10-21 08:42:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think anytime that you have to struggle with your sexuality, then you are usually gay. You probably did the 'straight' thing because it was easier and more acceptable for society, but deep down you were always gay. I know that for me (straight) -I have never had a question as to what sex I am attracted to, but many of my gay friends struggled and dated members of the opposite sex for years, just because it was what was expected of them and/or they didn't know how to go about dating a member of the same sex. It is so much easier for gay people today to just be themselves and do what feels best for them. Do what makes you happy!
2006-10-21 08:36:23 · answer #6 · answered by dlgrl=me 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are bi-sexual. Or it could be that you are straight, but are just curious about how it would be with a man, and perhaps that curiosity will come to an end when you actually do it and find out once and for all. The choice is yours
2006-10-21 08:32:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you liked what you did with women and like men too, then it sounds like you're bi. Maybe you have burnt yourself out on women and should try the guy side for a while. Just do what/who makes you happy and be responsible and safe.
2006-10-21 11:06:43 · answer #8 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray about it the devil puts those things in your mind same sex relationships are of the devil
2006-10-21 08:53:50 · answer #9 · answered by Steve A 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
with female expierence is more in tact but if u ar other way is nothing wrong with that
2006-10-21 08:43:02 · answer #10 · answered by george p 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋