2006-10-20 19:00:34 · 31 answers · asked by Jennifer W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you think he is the one then wait as long as possible. "Things come best, to those who wait." So i suggest waiting to see if you really are in love. It could also be a test of your love for him, he could be seeing if you are willing to stay around for something major.
good luck sweetie, take it easy!
2006-10-20 19:04:19 · answer #1 · answered by aricalyn10<3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're willing to take the relationship to the next level and he is not then you two are not equally viewing your relationship. If you are saying yes to marriage and he's saying no then somewhere along the path you two lost some communications. A relationship that is moving smoothly has both people on pretty much the same path. For example: If you believe that having sex before marriage is wrong and he doesn't. If he pushes you for it and wants you to comprimise then he's a bad influence. The same rules apply here. You need to make one last ditch effort, so to speak. Lay it flat out for him, with suitcase in hand. "I think we should get married soon?" Agree or disagree. If he uses the "not yet" answer then press him on what would get him to the "right time". If you are unwilling to wait that long and/or jump through those hoops walk out the door.
2006-10-21 02:17:31 · answer #2 · answered by X M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This of course this depends on your age. Studies show that infatuation lasts about 6-9 months, this is when you are all lovey- lovey. After that a couple usually finds themselves in a "settled" everyday life. Which happens around a 2 year period. If marriage isn't brought up, (an engagement) if this doesn't happen within this period, normally it won't happen. You can't MAKE someone marry you, and if you threaten them into it, chances are he may marry you, but it won't last anyway. I don't mean to sound so negative. What are your boyfriends reasoning's? Your worried about it, so you must know something that may be bothering him.
2006-10-21 02:19:30 · answer #3 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have lived with the love of my life for nearly 8 years and we are not married. Oprah winfrey and Stedman, also not married, together as a couple for 10 years. Then there is Goldie Hswn and KurtRussell, also not married, but together as a couple for decades. For some, relationships are more long lasting without an official marriage. Your beau may feel the relationship you share now is one that suits him and fears marriage could change some aspects of the relationship. He's happy the way things are. Why push for something that could rock your boat?
2006-10-21 02:17:26 · answer #4 · answered by kristy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he isn't ready after four years I guess it doesn't matter how much more time you give him. You can't force someone to marry you if they aren't ready. You must decide if you love him enough to stay with him or leave him and make a new life.
2006-10-21 02:07:15 · answer #5 · answered by ♥cinnamonmj♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not an easy decision for every guy, he asks himself if he is ready for this, to dedicate his entire life to just one woman, or if he's ready for these responsibilities, I know you think that it is perfect but in time you will realize that love does not guarantee a good life, he is probably thinking about this too, if you really love him then you will have to understand and give him as long as he needs to reach a decision.
2006-10-21 08:49:49 · answer #6 · answered by Faust 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, ask him for a reason,if he cannot give you a good one that make sense,I think you should consider the following:
1)Can you live without him
2)How much you feel for him
3)Has he got another love ones
4)Maybe he is not financially/physically prepare
5)Are you playing tantrum all the times ,that make him think that, he need some more time to consider
6)Any objection from the family
I think you should consider all these before you make any decision.
Anyway let me advice you ,Marriage is not secured unless the other party is dead.
2006-10-21 02:28:20 · answer #7 · answered by curiousmode 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha, he's been milking you for free for 4 years. I feel for you. You give yourself, morals, and ethics, to some man for 4 years and he's not willing to give a commitment because your too loose. If you hadn' given yourself up, maybe he'll consider marraige soon enough before 4 long years. sorry, I don't mean to sound rude or obnoxious, but female now a day sell themselve short and expect a man to committ to them. If he can milk the cow for 4 years, who's to say he's not going to get the next cow for and another 4 years.
2006-10-21 03:42:10 · answer #8 · answered by KaPaul L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Jennifer, He will never be ready.you have been with this guy for 4 years,it's time to move on and find a guy who is interested in having a family and getting marry.
Clowmy
2006-10-21 02:32:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him, you will wait unitl he is ready. With high divorce rates, men require more understanding of what they want and what they will want 10 years from now.
Think about it. Is it better to waite 4 more years for marriage or get divorced in 3?
2006-10-21 02:09:09 · answer #10 · answered by tightlies 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've heard stories of women who have waited for their whole lives for their boyfriends to get a clue. It doesn't happen unless you decide you are worth it. Don't give him the option. You deserve the commitment. Four years is long enough for him to decide. Engage or move on!
2006-10-21 02:04:57 · answer #11 · answered by yakimablueyes 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋