My hubby has a mistress. I live with him due to financial reasons and our child. I have had no sex for 2 years since I found out about his mistress. I miss being loved. Should I go out, have sex with other men? What about God's commandment?
2006-10-20 18:09:05 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow...2 years is a long time...he's getting his why don't you find a friend with benefits if you don't want to become involved,,,,,,,Good luck.............
2006-10-20 18:12:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ignore 'burnittodeath'. Staying with the butthead is wrong, for both you and the kid. A home with no love is not a place to raise a child. He's the one breaking God's commandment. But you need to be living a Christian life for those rules to apply. So, my advice is dump the bum. Otherwise, what kinda of life do you really have? Divorce, alimony (only because you have a kid), and child support. Take him to the cleaners. (I don't believe in alimony under normal circumstances. A woman with no ties can go out and get a job like anyone else instead of sitting on her butt and drawing a check.) Move in with mom for a short time til you get your life back going.... but only if you have to.
2006-10-21 01:22:32 · answer #2 · answered by unclewill67 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd ask him to leave. I'm like you, I don't believe in divorce unless there is abuse - but that is emotional abuse. If he left, you could get help financially until you get on your feet. I wouldn't go and have sex with someone just to get even. Be a good example for your child. Two wrongs don't make a right. One day while I was at work, a nurse I know called u-Haul and had them meet her at her house while the deceiving hubby was working. She was gone when he got home.
2006-10-21 02:10:20 · answer #3 · answered by mabell1025 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is wrong to have a mistress. I think you should get a divorce ASAP and never just "have sex" with someone unless you think they are going to be around for a while. Go to a "toy store" and pick some stuff up- but don't have sex with just anyone because of STD's and your own morals.
2006-10-21 03:25:22 · answer #4 · answered by momofthreemiracles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God's commandments are complicated :)
If you still have any love for you husband, then try and water that love. If this is true, then it sorta matters that he has a mistrees and sorta doesn't. Hard as that may seem, it can be livable. Others do it. More than you might think. I sure was surprised.
and if he loves you then he might dump her. no guarentees.
But .. It sounds like you don't really love each other. take a long look, but If true, then try and find a way out. Roommate, relative etc.
2006-10-21 01:17:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, you're okay with him having a mistress, but you're questioning wether you should go and have sex with another man? First off, there's something called, alimony, and separation. If he's a good man, he will support you if you decide to move on, because with you staying there he knows that you have no choice, so he feels that he can do what he wants. I'm not saying to be tit for tat, but you have to be happy, and do you, He's obviously doing him. But you gotta realize if you do lay down with another man is it for you to be happy and find someone, or is it to settle the score? Because if it's to settle the score, believe me, that will never be settled. So the best thing is to settle it in court, collect child support and alimony and move on. It seems to me like your husband isn't worried too much about his vows, so I would pray on it and let God guide you in the right direction to take for your child and for yourself.
2006-10-21 01:15:31 · answer #6 · answered by Dr. PHILlis (in training) 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, your husband has broken God's commandments and he will reap what he sow. Do you love him enough to stick around for that.
Second, don't cheat because God give us a way out of temptation and its not by committing another sin. If you do cheat then you are no better than your husband.
Third, if you do decide you want to leave your husband, try a seperation period first, to be sure you are making the right decision. God will honor your efforts.
2006-10-21 16:38:29 · answer #7 · answered by sugarfoot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband broke his promise to you already and he continues to disrespect and insult you. His has defiled your vows, your marriage and marriage bed. You can dump him like yesterday's garbage.
File for divorce and show him that you will not be trampled on. There will be lots of money for you, but get evidence of his adultery.
You deserve to be loved. This is not what God intended for you, rather, this is simply your husbands bad judgement and decision.
Good luck! You are essentially a victim of emotional abuse here. As a victim of abuse myself, let me tell you something and get it through your head anyway you can.
1) Stop allowing yourself to be a victim! Stand up tall, put out your chest and show yourself and others you know how you deserve to be treated, and it is with respect.
2) You are worthy of everything others have. I know you have convinced yourself that it is okay because you think it is better for the kids... it is not. They see what is going on. He is already likely absent in regards to the children on some level(s).
I wish you the best!
David
2006-10-21 01:22:57 · answer #8 · answered by David M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel that strongly about God's commandment, then you should leave him.....Better yet, go to school to be a nurse and take care of yourself.....You are not being fair to yourself...You deserve happiness too....
2006-10-21 01:21:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anastacia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey,
You only live once. Make the most of your life and God wants happiness for all his children. Wake up and make a new start for yourself and you kid. Take a step today or you'll regret thinking...."what if?"
Good luck
-chilledguy27
2006-10-23 03:35:38 · answer #10 · answered by chilledguy27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually in God's commandment you have won the ground to divorce him.
2006-10-21 03:43:23 · answer #11 · answered by George 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋