My husband has resently went to Iraq as a fireman. He is already on the internet talking to other girls and sending emails back and forth. Is this something Ishould worry about or just egnore and chuck it up to him being bored in a strange place.....please let me know, I am lost and hurt at the same time.
2006-10-20 17:41:41 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Please give him the benefit of doubt. Don't jump to conclusions. He is probably just bored and lonely. You didn't say if the converstions between these other females were friendly or flirty. If it really hurts your feelings, then I suggest you mention it to him. He doesn't sound like a bad guy so until you have proof I suggest you leave well enough alone. I'd just be happy that he is alive and well enough to write these e-mails. His life is in danger every day so a couple of e-mails would be the last thing on my mind. And don't listen to these fools out here talking about leaving him and he's a cheater. They are probably by themselves!!!Stand by your husband; he needs you now more than ever.
2006-10-20 19:14:46 · answer #1 · answered by sweettee 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
How do you know he is doing this? If you are reading his emails are they clean and decent?
I guess he can't get up to much mischief where he is but if he is looking to meet up with them after his tour I would be worried if I were you. Surely time is precious over there and internet time is limited. He must be very immature if he is chatting with other women when he could be chatting with his wife.
Tell him how you feel about this and how much it hurts you. If he truly loves and respects you he would stop doing it. If not, then he is showing you he is not committed and maybe you need to think about your future.
Talk with the other wives from his unit and find out if they think this is normal behaviour or not.
Good luck. I hope he does the right thing by you.
2006-10-20 17:54:11 · answer #2 · answered by anything_my_child 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honest truth I think you should really talk to your husband and confront the situation. If it is making you uncomfortable what he is doing, you need to be honest with him, specially if it's hurting you. There's only two ways this could turn on either he stops and shows you more respect or simply he keeps on doing it. That will only let you know his real feelings towards you and for that kind of men I think it would be better if you move on and up. You don't need the drama and remember that there is always somebody who will give you the respect and peace that you want. Good look and hopefully everything works out for the best!
2006-10-20 17:52:26 · answer #3 · answered by nancy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd be alittle concerned.. i mean wedding vows didnt say "forsake all others" except when ur doing a tour of duty in Iraq.. .. ur vows are suppose to be upheld at all times all places every day for the rest of your life.. not just when its convient for u.... and although it could very well be platonic now, he is in a very voulnerable place right now, as far as mentally, hes away from his home, he's in a strange place, he probably does feel rather lonely.. and this is not exactly a good time for him to be "leaning" on other women to fill that void, because "accidents" do happen.. Im not trying to scare u, but at the same time to give him the excuse that he's in Iraq, would be wrong as well.. if u play with fire ur bound to get burnt.. and he's playing with fire by talking to these other females..
I hope he comes to his senses soon, and realizes that he is putting his marriage at risk by doing this, because relationships usually start out as friendships and move to love.. so to say "their just friends" well could be true for now , but "what if" and is ur marriage worth the risk on a "what if"?
Good luck..
2006-10-20 18:01:52 · answer #4 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How is it you have found out that he is emailing back and forth with other girls? Is it just girls or is it guys too? I know others who have gone to Iraq and need to have contact with others in USA to know that though they may be strangers, they are proud of them of giving their time for our country! How do you know what these emails say? It sounds like you have trouble trusting him to begin with and if that is the case, that is something the two of you need to work on. Why would a firefighter be put over there? Is he in the Armed Forces as a Firefighter? Well I hope things work out for the two of you but if you are looking into his email and all of that, well I would say you guys are having problems that need to be looked at and talked about!!! Good luck!
2006-10-20 17:50:16 · answer #5 · answered by Laurie S 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is one thing to have up posters of girls, but to actually talk and flirt with girls over the internet is another. I would be worried and extremely jealous. He should be spending that time sending YOU emails and talking to YOU online. You are his wife. I don't know how much you actually get to talk to him, but try to be calm and really explain to him how you're feeling when he does that. And remind him that you love him. Iraq is a difficult place to be, but that still doesn't make it right for him to have relationships (even if only online) with other women.
2006-10-20 17:48:08 · answer #6 · answered by usmcwife722 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm just curious how you found out he is talking to other girls online..... Did he tell you this? Yeah, I would be hurt too and I would tell him just how I felt about it. I know Iraq is not a great place to be, but it doesn't give him the right to talk to other women online because he is there. Tell him you don't like it and it upsets you. Clear the air.
2006-10-20 18:44:21 · answer #7 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
NO it is not ok. You are his wife. He should be emailing you. His going to Iraq doesn't give him that priveledge in my book. When he gets home it may not stop at just an email. Take care of the situation now before you are hurt any more.
2006-10-20 17:47:37 · answer #8 · answered by Sissy 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i prob. won't win best answer or anything. but for a man to be sitting on his computer an talking with other girls ...he prob. has something on his mind an i don't mean the war. i know because of the computer friends i used to have. and i was just as equaly bored then too.
2006-10-20 18:46:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he's either a cheater or a cheater waiting to happen. Lay down the law and if he doesn't stop dabbling in the marketplace, cut him loose. It's not fair to you. You deserve better. Good luck.
2006-10-20 18:02:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋