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From the age of 13 I have been on and off the streets because of severe family problems. I got into a lot of trouble. Went to jail, sold drugs, etc. I told my newlywed husband all this...but I didn't tell him how I was forced into prostitution twice in my life. Although it wasn't for long periods of time, it has left a terrible mark on my soul. I need to tell someone about this to free myself. I despretely want to tell my husband but I am afraid of how he will look at me. Should I suffer to keep my dark secret or should i tell him the truth?

2006-10-20 15:38:51 · 17 answers · asked by Sieanna K 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

17 answers

You have told someone - you shared it with us.

I do not believe people should have to share every detail of their past with their spouses. You aren't the person you were then. He fell in love with who you are NOW. We all do things in our lives we wish we could change or take back or do over. The only "bad" there is if you hadn't learned from it or desired to improve yourself.

The one person who needs to understand and forgive you is YOU. Quit beating yourself up. You did what you did to survive.

I don't even know you and I'm proud of you! Hold your head up, hon, you did good...all the ugliness is behind you. Enjoy your life with your new husband, you deserve it.

2006-10-20 15:57:30 · answer #1 · answered by Dez 4 · 1 0

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2015-01-28 12:37:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I'm in a marriage and I had a lot of dark sercets. I told my husband before we were married because they were haunting me literally. I had a previous relationship with someone else and when I decided to marry my husband I had to break it off, well the other person won't leave me alone so I had to tell my husband and I thought that would be the end of our relationship but we worked it out by going to marriage conseling and he forgave me. Don't let your secret run your life because he will find out and it would be much worse to hear from someone else than his wife trust me.

2006-10-20 15:46:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

be careful. I too have a troubled backround. two months before I got married I told him. It was part of the rules, if you ever get married, tell the other person between 2 months to 2 weeks of the date about that part of your past or never speak a word about it. For a bit before that date, I hinted around & what not to see his reaction. I mostly got alot of strange looks. I hinted even harder as it got closer, so he wouldn't be so shocked. But he was still pretty pissed, even though I never did anything serious, just minor involvment. He said he'll have to think about if he still wants to marry me & he'll tell me on monday (I told him on a fri.) Luckly he was ok with it, even though I think it changed how he looks at me. It's not like I ever denied it before. And its not like I had never mentioned stuff like that or hinted about it before. It wasn't prostitution though. Just be careful in whatever you decide

2006-10-20 15:48:30 · answer #4 · answered by prepishippie 3 · 0 0

Please go talk to a professional about this. If you can not afford one, there are ways to see one free. Go to a women's centre, talk to your Dr, who can recommend you to someone. What you are carrying around deep in you, will not just go away on it's own..but it will fester inside of your and inhibit you to become the best you can be. You will need to talk to your husband, so at least he understands, or tries to understand, what you are going thru. This will likely be the hardest thing you have ever had to do..face your problems by letting it out with a councillor(who, you will become to trust..i promise you that)..you will realize what you have done, was in fact an attempt to hide your true feelings, emotions etc...I feel for you..I've gone thru my own hell..good luck..*hugsss*

2006-10-20 16:02:26 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0 0

If you are sincerely concern for your soul, you should get involved with a church, get saved if you haven't already, and take it to god and your pastor first, once you completed this step then your pastor or clergyman can guide you to releasing this info to the right people who will be loving and understanding and not cast unnecessary judgements on you because is the only one who can rightfully judge us.

2006-10-20 18:52:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Leave it in the past where it belongs. Sometimes people gotta do what they gotta do just to survive. You're not that same person anymore, you turned your life around and made it into something beautiful. Congrats!
We all make mistakes, forgive yourself and live life well.

2006-10-20 16:20:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I think you should tell him the truth. And just explain the situation that you were in to have to do the prostutution. It sounds like you wouldnt have done it if you didnt have too. As long as you arent continung to do it, he should understand. If he loves you enough, he will support you and help you get over the mark on your soul. I hope this helps you and I wish you luck!

2006-10-20 15:43:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

yes you can find peace.i have also horrible scars from my past and i can tell you the first thing you need to do is to be honest ith your husband or may i ask what kind of marriage do you have that you can not come to him for support you have to be also ready to accept what happen and to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself it took me many years to let go of the hurt,anger and the mistrust of people when i met my future husband i had to be honest with him tell him things i didn't want him to know for fear he would leave me but i found great relief to tell him and we are still together he is my best friend and i know i can come to him for anything and he will understand but you have to be honestwith him tell me what if it was him that had the problem what would you want him to do and for safety reason i would also be honest with him surround yourself with family and friends and you will make it i also found the lord

2006-10-20 16:03:03 · answer #9 · answered by rosemarie r 1 · 0 0

dont tell him baby girl, you can talk to me, thats why they have yahoo answers so you can tell us and get it off your chest! Seriously! He doenst need to know that, if you do tell him, he will think about it everytime he looks at you, the past is the past, dont put a question mark where God had put a period......just leave it alone.

2006-10-20 16:30:00 · answer #10 · answered by Lace 3 · 0 0

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