Does my husband have another woman?

Question

Me and my husband have been together for 6 years. We got married at the ages of 19, and 22. We have 2 kids together, and I have 2 from a previous relationship. We just purchased our first home two years ago, and it seems like thats when everything took a turn for the worse. He has turned so nasty and disrespectul towards me. I often find myself asking him more than twice everytime I want to have sex to please me. Then it still does not happen. Then when we do get intimate, its straight to the point. No 4 play or nothing. Everything he says to me is so negative and nasty. Deep down inside I know I deserve better, but he's my 1st husband and I really love him. Then on the other hand I take care of our 4 boys, the house needs, and work 40hrs a week. All he does is pay half of all the bills and run the streets all the time. He has told me he does'nt have to do nothing for me cause I am grown. He only has to take care of him and his kids. I know he's young, but everything use to be perfect.

Answer 1

There is no such thing as perfect in a relationship. The one thing that young people do not realize is that Love grows boring and old. How many times can you have sex or love someone the exact same way before you want more excitement.

I don't think its cheating...It sounds like he resents you for the responsiblities he faces everyday. He has the guilt of HAVING to take care of a wife and four kids..TWO which are not even his.

Sounds like he is fustrate from the HAVE TO life and does not have time to do WANT To's!

You must feel the same way by now. Sounds like you two need a serious talk.

Answer 2

It seems to me like he is not ready to grow up. The first step in growing up is the family then buying a house which builds a lot of stress. The way to get away from the stress is to run the streets and he also takes it out on you. It could be something at work too if he is stressed there too. Maybe he is just not happy with his job? But as far as the way he is treating you, let him know about how you feel and maybe suggest counseling or something because nobody should have to take that!!

Answer 3

Get the book The Proper Care And Feeding Of Husbands by Dr. Laura Schinger and read it,also call Dr.Laura on 640KFI AM from 12:00 pm til 3:00pm mon thru fri. She will have a answer for you.

Answer 4

It sounds to me that he needs to get professional counseling, and if I was in your shoes I would go with him.
There is nothing perfect in this world, but you and him both need to have a better life together.
Now, do I have an outstanding life with my wife? No I do not.
Myself, I would Rather be working than sitting around doing nothing, my kids and wife can honestly say that I never sit around and not support them. I was not there for my family, but at least I supported them with a roof on their head, they never went hungry, and they always had decent clothes to wear to school.
I hope that he stops running the streets before it is too late, because I have been there and done that. Now I cannot stand myself because I was never home for my kids when they were young.
I wish you and your hubby the best of luck in the world.

Answer 5

ugh i hate when people who obviusly dont want to be in the relationship continue to let the relationship run. its unfair to the other person. my ex husband did the exact same thing. we started going out when i was 13 and he was 17. we ended up marrying at a very young age and recently got divorced. we were actually separated for about 3 years before i had the guts to file. he was my everything. he taught me alot of things and it was great while it lasted but things turned ugly. he ran the streets, turned into an alcoholic and cheated on me with some chick who he is still with today. he tries his absolute hardest to make things work with me again and is always trying to sneak over to my house. i even came close to getting into physical fist fights with the other woman. i will never understand why. but i feel for you and hope everything works out.

Answer 6

The answer seems obvious by your post, but we haven't heard from him and maybe neither have you. Why don't you put the question to him directly instead of torturing yourself and / or making yourself out to be a martyr? In all probability he is tired of being monogamous, but that doesn't mean he's had an affair or is having one.

I suggest you somehow drag him away from the house and kids. A dinner out is perfect. Then explain that you don't consider his behavior satisfactory and ask him directly if he wants out of the marriage. That sort of shock treatment may, at worst, get you the answers you seek here.

Answer 7

He still wants to act young and single. But if you suspect him
cheating on you. Then you need to protect your self from some
kind of disease. Lost of women get herpes from their spouse
because of the cheating, and then here comes the Apology, when it's too late. As long as he's helping out with the bills.
But if he doesn't come home then somethings up. For the sake of the boys, you better hope he is not cheating. Try talking to
him, if he starts yelling then ,ask him if he wants out because
he seems distance. And he said himself he is only there for the
kids. Your grown, now that's a hint. Try to hang in there, just
in case things change for the better. But if it doesn't then it'll
be better off with out him. you'll just be miserable. The kids can always keep in touch with him. Don't worry the kids would be
okay. Never stay with someone because of the kids. When I
had my first child, and my daughters father did the same to us.
My daughter noticed so she is the one that spoke up first, she
told him he had to move out, she was then 5 now 22 . I told him
that it was his fault because he just wanted to hang out with friends and forgewt about us. So he had no choice but to move
out. We are so happy without him. But my Daughter says that
the man that I've been with is her Father.

Answer 8

You married to young to start with. Neither one of you was mature enough now put 4 kids in the pot and 2 are not his. The home purchase was the straw that broke the camels back. I would say he is feeling overwhelmed with to much responsibility and his only outlet is to get away.

Answer 9

The way that it sounds like is that just might be what is going on. It sounds to me like he is a very selfish & lazy jerk that is putting mostly all of the responsibilities onto your shoulders. If all that he is doing is going to work and then playing around after work, how is it that he can say that he is taking care of his boy's? Because if he is meaning money wise then he is totally wrong. That is only helping you/them but it is not taking care of them. He should be wanting to spend more time with them and he should be taking them to the park, playing games with them, helping them with their school work, etc, and just being a devoted & loving dad to them and also a devoted & loving husband to you too. He should not be ignoring his family! That is being completely & totally selfish on his part! I'm sorry but he does not only sound like a dead beat husband he also sounds like a dead beat dad as well. If having him around is more harm for you & your boy's then good then you should tell him to leave.
I wish all of you the best!
Good Luck To You & your Boy's.

Answer 10

Everybody is stressed out in these times .... Uncle Sam has it so that both parents have to work 40-plus hours anymore just to break even . Your problem is common . Remember , we have a war going on , gas & fuel oil are at a record high ( even with the recent price drop), and living costs are out the roof . Maybe the pressure of everything is getting to him . Still, he sounds like he is starting to isolate himself from you . SEEK CLERGY HEL:P and/or counseling before things get rougher. Things may save-able .Try things first, before just throwing in the towel . AND GET OUT AND VOTE DEMOCRAT .