we both agrred to wait atleast 2yrs b4 d 2nd baby.we ve been usin condoms over a yr, just once she told she was save and we shuld do without condoms. i beliefed cos i felt d woman knws beta abt her circle.a mnth later now she said she is pregnant.she is tellin me she wont get rid of it dat she wants it.i think dat has been her plan all d way,cos d 1st baby was d same.am a student frm a foreign country,my parents still pay my skool fee.and i cant afford to be responsible 4 2kids less than 3yrs in dis country.am thinkin of leavin her cos she is a liar and deceptive.
2006-10-20 10:59:49 · 51 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Look if you really think she is a liar then you should talk to her. Be honost not only to her but also to yourself do you really like her or is she just some girl? Think about it and talk to her b4 leaving her. If after talking to her you still think that she is a liar go ahead and leave her but first think about the two babies. Do they really need to suffer for her fault. Use your knowledge to think and figure out what is best not only for the two of you but also for the babies. Take your time and good luck.
2006-10-20 11:07:39 · answer #1 · answered by BIBI 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its hardly a reason to leave her, you're already a father to 1 child so be responsible, right now your girlfriend and child needs you a great deal. It took you both to make a baby so support your family, the girlfriend, the child and the unborn baby. You don't actually know for sure that you have been lied to or decieved, you are just assuming this, you ought to trust your partner more, relationships are based greatly on trust. You should never have asked her to abort the baby either, that is a decision that could have destroyed her whole life forever. I am not a woman and am not necessarily taking sides but come on man, accept your responsibilities, get a good job and support the family you have created.
2006-10-20 11:11:47 · answer #2 · answered by paul w 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Isn't it a bit late to want out? What about the children?
Nothing else is more important!
So either you are a "stand up"man who will face his responsibilities, (columnn A) or you're like the thousand upon thousand of others who make excuses. after they have screwed up, and then start thinking of themselves only (colum B).
I repeat..what about the children? You see, unlike you, she cannot just up and leave...then who will the children ( who has no say in this matter) have.
If you are the man you think you are, you will find a way to manage both...honor and provide for your children and still continue to advance yourself educationally.
Use this situation to prove yourself and do whats right. Neither children was a wise decision. Now, two children later, you are thrust into a situation you had not planned for.
The choice is yours...will it be column A or column B.
2006-10-20 11:32:59 · answer #3 · answered by Robere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me guess, you guys probably don't have a lot of money and she can't go to the County Health Department to get birth control because you won't watch the kids long enough for her to get a pap smear, huh?
Buddy, even though she's the one that's pregnant, you are just as responsible to take actions to prevent the pregnancy. Leave her if you must, she is probably better off without you anyway since you are leaving her because YOU knocked her up.
Either way it goes, you are abandoning your family because she "lied" to you. Condoms are not 100% effective, so there is the chance that you impregnated her while wearing a condom. That's your own damn fault.
Anyway, even if you are a foreign student, you should learn a little better... okay, a lot better English/grammar. And whether you leave her or not, it's up to you. You're a pig either way.
2006-10-20 11:11:28 · answer #4 · answered by Summer 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You both have severe problems. I think you should make arrangements to put the baby up for adoption. It is not going to have a very good life by the sounds of it if you and the girlfriend keep him/her.
You are in such a sad situation. I feel bad for the two babies that are so innocent and certainly do not deserve the type of life you describe. I don't think much of your girlfriend or you. You are both equally to blame in all this. Regardless of what she is, the babies don't deserve a life of hell.
The two of you will never make it together. I don't have an answer except to secure good homes for both of the children and then you and the girlfriend go your separate ways. Perhaps some day when you both grow up and become adults, you will understand what you did and be able to make up for it in some way.
2006-10-20 11:08:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It does take 2 to tango, you are just as responsible for her pregnancy as she is, be a man and stand by her, I detest men who get girls pregnant and once they find out that she is, then they are off like a shot.
You obviously have no idea what young ladies / mothers go through, I doubt you couldn't last a day being a mother with kids with all that looking after the kids, housework, etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,etc,+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I am a disabled married father of 2 children, I am 50 years old and like my wife, I will always stand by her side no matter what.
I married her vowing to love and to cherish till death do us part and all the other word I VOWED TO HER. Now you do the same, I absoloutely adore her and respect all the nice ladies out there who are genuine.
Come on, be a gentleman, don't leave the poor girl in the lurch.
2006-10-20 11:44:37 · answer #6 · answered by DIAMOND_GEEZER_56 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see a lot of people dogging you out here. The fact is you have a responsibility to the children. That does not mean you have to stay with her though. Just remember that if you do not stay with her you are still the father and have responsibility's to the children. The other thing I would suggest is that you get tests done to make sure there yours, cause if she had gotten pregnant from someone else and then convinced you to have sex without a condom to blame you for the pregnancy then it is not your issue. Here's the rundown. Have blood tests done to verify you are the father. Take care of the kids that are yours. You don't have to stay with her epically if she has lied to you, she will do it again. SO if you do decide to break up with her, explain why and tell her you will still be there for your children but do not want to continue in the relationship with her due to her dishonesty.
2006-10-20 11:14:37 · answer #7 · answered by shamrock421sd 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
a child is both parents responsibility, no matter if you wanted a second pregnancy or not. If you did not want to risk a pregnancy, you should not have had sex at all if you did not trust her!!! You want all the fun, but no responsabilty, it seems you are acting as 10 yr old
You are very selfish if you do not want to support her and leave her. When the going gets though, the little boy gets out.
Grow up, be a man and don't run away from your responsabilities. people like you are the reason so many young children grow up to be crappy adults!
2006-10-20 11:08:40 · answer #8 · answered by bbbmiot 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is the most selfish thing I ever heard. Whether you like it or not these are your children you are talking about, not a pair of socks. We can't always decide when we want kids to come into our life, but they are a gift and they deserve parents who will try to give them the best start in life possible.
Accidents happen with contraception - if you are too much of a baby to cope with the consequences DON'T HAVE SEX IN THE FIRST PLACE. You are just as responsible for this as your girlfriend, if you leave her you will be on a par with the piece of dog muck I just scraped off my shoe. GROW UP.
2006-10-20 11:15:32 · answer #9 · answered by drblonde 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's a word called no. If she said no condoms u should said no sex. What are u gonna do be a father to one and not be there for the other. Either way u are paying child support for both. Baby is coming and that's that. U don't pay u go to jail. Stop fucken n focus on your kids and education. All this would of been prevented if u said no. Even if u leave u still gotta pay so it's pointless. U play u pay. Fool me once like she did shame on her fool me twice shame are u cuz u knew she would do it again n u basically consented to doing it
2016-01-01 02:08:06 · answer #10 · answered by amy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋