My fiance is keep asking me to go to the gym and tone my body, I understand that we are going to get married in 2 months. And he wants me to look nice front of his family and freinds. But sometimes its disturbing me. I am 5'2 and 135 pounds. I dont look fat but yeah i am not tone like the movie star. What should i do, is he is write, is it every guy's dream to be with nice body or is he's not in love or what.
2006-10-20 09:57:11 · 17 answers · asked by Alisha 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you are happy with your body then he shouldnt say anything. Scary though... whats he gonna say after you have a baby or two and your whole body and skin is out of shape and you gain weight? Whats his deal - does he love you for the person you are and will be in the future - or is he looking for a trophy wife who just looks perfect and thats all that matters? your weight is totaly on target with your height.. dont let him think you are fat or that there is anything wrong with you... im sure your beautiful
2006-10-20 10:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by !?!?! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, Don't take this wrong but...........That sounds a bit heavy to me too. I am 5'2 and weigh 104. I have been thinking about going to the gym to tone up a bit too. Can't hurt.
And NO your guy should not be asking you to loose weight. That is pretty rude and it would make me feel terrible. If he does not like the way you look now your probably only going to get heavier with age. I don't know if I would go ahead and marry him or not.
2006-10-20 10:02:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is not right to ask the one you love to change. it's true that some guys don't realize that or have the fantasy that the one they love should be perfect in every way. this doesn't mean he's not in love, it's just a slight sign of imaturity.
if you're ok with your body (and by the stats you write i'd say you look quite ok) then tell him to accept you as you are -imperfect as you are, because he'll be seeing you for the rest of his life. and a girlfriend is not a prop you show up in front of your friends. they're going to have to like you as you are too.
if you don't want to lose weight don't do it just to please him -you'll only spoil him and he'll get the habit of making you fit into his whims every time. remind him you're a real person and not an actress playing the role of his ideal woman.
2006-10-20 10:08:09 · answer #3 · answered by Missy ~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are happy with your body that is all that should matter.. I wanted to loose weight when I got married just because I wanted to look the best I could.. You guys could always work out together and be healthy together but there is no reason that you should tone up unless you want to.. Congrats on getting married and I hope it all works out for you!
2006-10-20 10:03:03 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he should be saying anything about your weight. If you are not fat (and it doesn't sound like you are) then why is he concerned?
I weight more than my man. I have gained some weight since we met. He does not care because he loves me for who I am not what I look like. He is a very kind and loving person who sees the person on the inside of the body.
He says he thinks I am beautiful (which I know I am not). He is looking at my character, personality, and heart when he says that. He doesn't care about my weight unless I am in danger of ruining my health.
2006-10-20 10:01:22 · answer #5 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no such thing as Normal. Does he have the right to ask, Yes, but YOU have the RIGHT to say no and to question his motives. Everyone is allowed the right to ask questions the main thing is what to do with the question and what choice you make. Will you resent him, Do you resent the question, Are you happy with yourself and who you are? These are all questions you have to look inside you for. No one has the right though to mold you into what you do not want to be. Ask him what is his motive. Appearences are skin deep, ask him if he loves whats inside. You sound like you are happy with who you are so don't allow anyone to change how you feel about yourself. I have been there done that and it is not worth it.
2006-10-20 10:04:58 · answer #6 · answered by Theresa H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends how he is asking. I do not necessarily ask my wife to lose weight. I say, let's go to the gym together. Let's take a walk etc... I am not in perfect condition and I do not expect her to be...We try to stay fit. I don't think it means he does not love you, he might just need to ask a different way.
2006-10-20 09:59:39 · answer #7 · answered by JD34 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
N/R but maybe he wants you to look nice but what u need 2 do is talk 2 him about it and let him know how u feel about him saying that and ask him why
2006-10-20 10:01:50 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah=hoplessly in love 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He obviously loves you for what's inside or he wouldn't be marrying you, but what's wrong with making the outside just as desirable? GO TO THE GYM, GIRL!
2006-10-20 09:59:54 · answer #9 · answered by Socrates 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It would depend on what his motivation is. I would be cautious though, if he's this way now, before you're married, what happens later when you're married and have kids and your body is no longer like it is now? Things change. How will he react to that?
2006-10-20 09:59:47 · answer #10 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋