So I split up with my gf 7 weeks ago and it has been tough to get rid of the hurt. We split up mainly 'cause I put too much pressure on her when she was under a lot of stress. The last time we saw each other it was in a sreaming match 7 weeks ago though we were on friendly terms a few weeks ago via txt msgs. We were together for 6 months.
Although I have been able to pull my emotions together, I still cannot get her off my mind. She is there from the moment I wake up till the moment I go to bed. Not in the back of my mind -- up front.I even find myself talking to her sometimes in my imagination. I'm trying to figure out whether she's on my mind because I still deeply love her, or is it just because she was part of my life?
This is the 1st time I have had to get over someone. So from the people that are experienced in this, did you find that if the relationship was not based on love , could you easily forget about someone?
Should I try to make it work with her again?
2006-10-20 05:25:45 · 40 answers · asked by madmax 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It could be because you still love her...you might still love her, it has only been 7 weeks.
But when you split up with someone it is really easy to confuse missing them (which happens to everyone) to loving them and therefore wanting them back, that's why so many of us go back to bad relationships cos whether they were good for us or not, they were part of our lives and have become a habit.
It sounds to me though that you know you still have feelings for her, and that splitting up in the first place wasn't what you wanted.
Maybe try and meet to talk things out, try to keep it calm but be honest, cos you need to know where she is at.
good luck x
2006-10-20 05:29:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is life and memory. It is not only about love/gf/bf.
Look back when you were 12 years old. 6 years old etc you have memories good and bad that creep into your weeks thoughts today. If you were accused of something you did not do it is unresolved and you remember that. If something nice happened after that you hold onto that. Before you met you GF you were possibly empty or not happy because you were alone, and now you are alone again. It is not your GF you think about as much as that empty space in your life.
If you want to be happy take some time to find out how to be happy in that empty space. Your future relationships will all be stronger if you can. Remember life is like a pie and your relationship should only be one piece of that pie. When it becomes something more, you will know that the other 7 slices of that 8 slice pie needs you. Now get to work and get a full life. A woman loves a man who has less time for them because they are busy at the bakery!!!
2006-10-20 05:38:27 · answer #2 · answered by laxthefacts 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it is because you love her, I doubt it. sorry to sound so blunt. I'm not saying that I doubt you love her, you probably do. I still love my ex, the thing is that, in the real world sometimes love isn't always enough. I think the reason you think about her all the time is because you spent so long with her that things are different without her. Everything around you reminds you of her and if it doesn't, it just doesnt feel the same without her so you're reminded of her again. I suggest you move on with your life and agree to be best friends. Because, noe, me and that ex I was telling you about, we've got something better than any relationship I've ever had. So now, even though there's someone new in my life, who I love, Nothing will ever come between what me and this person share, and it's the best feeling in the world, to know you have something that can't be ruined. Be her best friend. Friends are always here for us, this way, She'll always be a part of your life
2006-10-20 05:34:31 · answer #3 · answered by leicestertroy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are in love with her. You should try to get back with her and tell her how you feel about her and want to be with her. But only if you think it will work out...don't waste your time or her time if you have problems that you know won't work out in the future. Sometimes people break up for a good reason because in the long run it's not good for the both of you. But if you're willing to change or willing to compromise with whatever made you split in the first place then...you should call her up and take her to a dinner and a movie...be really romantic and tell her you're sorry and you love her.
2006-10-20 05:38:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is the first time that you have had to get over someone, thats probably why its so hard to forget her. you are still learning how. as far as you asking do you still love her...only you know that answer. did you ever REALLY love her? or did she just become a part of you because she was in your life everyday? thats the question that will give you your answer. have you ever felt this way about someone before? have you had another girlfriend for longer than 6 months?
ask yourself if you really love her or if the reason you are thinking so much of her is because you are breaking the habit of having her in your life. and theres your answer. i know its kinda complicated, but i promise that this is how you seperate real love from everyday habit. (do you think of her more often when you hear a song you used to listen to together or when things happen that used to happen when you were together? or is she just on your mind anyways?) GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-20 05:34:11 · answer #5 · answered by Ashley 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes I believe you are still in love with her. Do you think she loves you though? It is always worth a second try but if you know she doesnt feel the same it's time to give up take the agony and move on when you heal. I got over 3 guys in days and knew i hadnt allowed myself to love them but 2 others i did love and its excruciatingly painful like you i cant get the person off my mind all day all night and its really hard to move on. Good luck mate I hope she loves you back and you are both happy. You at least have to ask her, you dont get if you dont ask.
2006-10-20 05:36:57 · answer #6 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart, it sounds like you have it BAD!!! Call the girl. Tell her you're sorry and that you love her. If she loves you too, she'll forgive you and respect you for making the first (hardest) move.
If things don't work out that way, at least you had that experience of loving someone. You should be grateful, no matter what, that you got the chance to feel this way. A lot of people will never open themselves up enough. Good luck!!!! :-)
2006-10-20 05:31:59 · answer #7 · answered by baby_girl_8881 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, you can't "make" it work. You dated for 6 months and it was a disaster. You put too much pressure on her, you had screaming matches, and you weren't compatible. That's it.
You keep thinking about her because you keep thinking about her. You indulge yourself because you like it. You enjoy thinking about her because you probably don't have a whole lot going on in your life-- otherwise you'd be too busy.
You get over it by controlling your thoughts. Think about something else. Get a hobby. Stop going around inventing conversations.
I don't believe 6 months of putting pressure on someone to the point of screaming matches and a breakup constitutes "deep love"- it sounds like an infatuation gone bad.
2006-10-20 05:31:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think you still love her. You probably are also thinking a lot about it because the main cause of the break up was you. Maybe, you are feeling guilty that you %$@#$! up. IF you were a bit more understanding and wouldn't put pressure on her, things might have worked out for the best. I think you should apologize to her and try and make things work out. It's obvious you still have feelings for her.
2006-10-20 05:29:57 · answer #9 · answered by Yessenia A. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dude, I tried everything I possibly could to get rid of my fiance about 2 months ago when I was in NV. (Nevada), I thought I didn't love him cause he came down when I told him not to. And I didn't want to love him. I was visiting family in NV and on the east coast of Oregon. Ontario, Oregon. But the love for him never left me. I couldn't do anything about it, except come back home and never let him go. So if you still love this young lady, and you have tried to get your mind off of this lady, then try and get her back. Let her know what you are feeling!!
2006-10-20 05:35:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋