My husband was blocking me from entering our house. I was trying to get around him when he pushed me down 2 stairs. I did not fall down but I lost my balance and stumbled down the two stairs and dropped the dvd player that I was holding.
2006-10-20 05:16:17 · 23 answers · asked by Cheryl U 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We have been married 10 years, have 1 child (9) and the last 2 yrs have been very rocky. We actually are legally seperated for 1 yr. My therapist, who has met with us, says he has a narcisistic PD. He is very controlling with everybody not just me. Why cant I just take the step and leave ?? What is the matter with me ?? I dont want to be divorced or have my son be from a broken home. AHHHHHHHHHH!
2006-10-20 05:31:13 · update #1
Even though we are legally seperated we are still living together. We actually were trying to work things out.
2006-10-20 05:32:58 · update #2
Why put yourself in a situation where you or your son can get hurt physically? I think your husband has a very serious problem and you should not stick around to see if he changes. I divorced my ex-husband 3 years ago because he would drink and get verbally abusive. One day, he came home drunk and pushed me. It was the first time I actually felt afraid of him during our 16 year marriage. I called the cops on him and had him removed out of my house. A week later I was signing divorce papers.
If your husband is not willing to look for help and DO his part to change, then you need to protect yourself and protect your son. I rather have my kids come from a broken home, than having my kids witness the abuse and then maybe even repeat the abuse in the future with their wives/girlfriends.
Life doesn't end because you get a divorce. Life can be great after divorce. Believe me, I was single for 2 years after my divorce and finally found a wonderful man who loves me and loves my children. I couldn't be happier.
Good luck!
2006-10-20 06:41:17 · answer #1 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would rather have your son see his father abuse and physically assault his mother than leave? Unfortunately, there are parents that have a warped sense that staying in a traumatic relationship is better for thier children than actually leaving so thier children won't be from a "broken home" - a broken home is a dysfunctional home where there is abuse (both physical, emotional, AND verbal) drug use, or anything that can harm husband, wife or children! You could cause your son more harm than good by staying, especially if he is witness to his dad pushing his mom around. He will think its the way to live and he will accept what you accept to be OK, and it is by no means OK. Y would you put yourself through that? Be a better person and take your son out of that environment. Find your inner strength you need to get some help! GOD BLESS!
2006-10-20 12:53:50 · answer #2 · answered by HereweGO 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, my heart goes out to you as I've been there. I felt the same as you about divorcing and my boys. We also pushed each other around. Things got better for us and through much counselling (2 years) we worked it out and now our marriage is better than ever so it can work out. Its really tough though when you both startou're in the middle of it. One very important question, are you both dedicated to working this out? When you both start fighting, the more sane one needs to walk away until the other calms down. Very important, Do NOT exchange words when one is angry. If this can't be worked out remeber the words of Dr. Phil - Its better for a child to be from a broken home than live in one. Best of luck to you girl.
2006-10-20 12:57:16 · answer #3 · answered by me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not abuse but more like physical assault and that too depends on the force and whether or not there are any visible signs of bruising. You don't want to wait around too long and let yourself be used as a test dummy to determine what is considered abuse. If you only fell on two steps and not two flights of stairs then I don't think they will consider that abuse but you can call your local police department to find out for sure.
2006-10-20 12:27:42 · answer #4 · answered by Tanya 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it always starts out with a push, then it gets worse. if you are ligally seperated why are you still living together? tell him to get his own place and put some distance between you and him. if you still want to try to work things out you can. you said you don't want to be divorced...but you won't be the only divorced woman in the world. and your child will grow up and live his/hers own life one day.so think about it and i hope you make the right decision.
good luck
2006-10-20 15:57:14 · answer #5 · answered by bluefishamerica 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely yes, this is considered abuse. He also may not stop you from entering the home, he may not stop you if you are trying to leave. Is this typical behavior of him? Does he try to control you, become angry when he cannot get his way? You may want to check out some information on profiling male abusers. Be careful. Try this site for more information. http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm
2006-10-20 12:33:03 · answer #6 · answered by kandekizzez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please find a way to walk. Your child is better off with a broken home than an abusive, bullying home. And a push can turn into more violence in a heart beat. This just isn't healthy and no one deserves to be abuse, whether it be physical, emotional or mental.
2006-10-20 12:41:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't know my husband had another wife. LOL Look, he's a jerk. Maybe after you leave he will realize that he has problems and will get help. That's what I hope for my own situation. Things are O.K. right now, but at the next sign of s.hit like that, I'm gone.
2006-10-20 12:37:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you mean "stairs" or "steps"?
A one time push is STUPID, but I wouldn't call it abuse.
HOWEVER, if you did mean stairs even if it was the first time he ever pushed you that was VERY STUPID and moron need to know that it is not acceptable to get physical.
My wife pushed me from the back once and I tripped over the coffee table. I was pissed, but I also know I really pissed here off. She has never pushed me again and I have never raised my hand to her in anger. Of course we both have martial art training and do spare, but that's about form and technique not anger.
2006-10-20 12:36:29 · answer #9 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Domestic Abuse charges could be filed.
Physical abuse includes hitting, slapping, pushing, punching, withholding vital medicine, or refusing to help someone with a medical need. Actions such as throwing things through windows, breaking things, or threatening to shoot someone are a combination of physical and emotional abuse.
domestic violence
n.
Violence toward or physical abuse of one's spouse or domestic partner.
2006-10-20 12:29:30 · answer #10 · answered by chuck16023 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋