I am Sneha, having problem in relationship with my husband.?

Question

I am Sneha, having problem in relationship with my husband.

We married nine years ago and have a son of 6 years old. During this nine year we both have good relations and understanding husband and wife. My husband has own business in Pune at central place. Also doing well.

Now days my husband comes in contact with my sister in law (my brother’s wife) and asking me for divorce. He is not giving solid reason for divorce. He wants mutual understandings and want to get separated. But I am against him as together we developed the world. All my in laws are staying with us and know all this matter. They sometimes support me; sometimes they take side of their son. They say at their time they marries more than one lady.

My husband is not ready for counseling with me.

My sister in laws also has a son 3 years ago. She left my brothers house and went to her mother’s home. My brother’s relations is violated with her.

At this moment I am frustrated and loosing faith for life. Please suggest me the correct remedy. If there is any Woman welfare organization or Law organization from which can support me.

Answer 1

yeah take help of womens organisation

but i tink his sis is instigating him against u (bhadka rahi hai )

or maybe he loves his sister (dre r name cases lyk dat )

a friendly talk wil not help u hv 2 take sum action a strong ones

Answer 2

If ur husband doesnt want to stay with u,why force and pressurise him and urself on the present relationship.Sneha,I would suggest,instead of being in this disrespectful relationship,move out of it,if u r independent.These days women are no longer illtreated if single.You can always remarry,if u choose to.Women's organisations will help u fight ur case if u want to get back into marriage,or alimonies from the proposed divorce.This is not going to happen in a day or two.You will have to face tremendous tensions and stress over this.What u will achieve is a bad marriage and some money,if separated.

Answer 3

Dear Sneha,

You say you have had a married life for nine years with a good relationship and understanding. Why dont you speak openly with your husband and sincerely ask as to why he wants to end the relationship with you? The corrolary to this is whether he will ditch your sister-in-law too! (Since he has taken a decision to ditch you).
No self respecting man will leave his own family for another. He does not seem to be having any attachment to you or your son. If he had been dry earlier in his relationship, find out the reason. You can get sufficient hints on this by observing the way he behaves at home too. A man who cannot attach himself to a nine year old relationship cannot guarantee a relationship which he feels he is going to start. As they say, the devil lies in details. You can dig out his reason by detailed analysis either by conversing with him as a friend or by keeping your mind open to your own feelings.
Acting as his friend in assisting him think the way he feels will make his point clear as also your stand. Never try to but in your ego during this open hearted conversation since it will lead to devastating results.

Answer 4

You knew that he had the problem when u married him i understand. He can take the bus there then u pick him up a marriage is give and take if u have to make sacrifice's so does he its only fare . If the new job will benefit the both of you than u do it he is just going to have to understand its not your fault that he was convicted don't let him be selfish to you stand up for your self and do what is rite for your career and money issues let him do some work as per getting him self there he is not going to die and it will make appreciate his license more if he had to struggle a bit cause if you don't take the job and you drive him back and forth who is to say that he will not do it again or if he will want to get his license back he may want to be lazy and have you take him and he may also like the control of telling you no you cant get the job. I hope you understand and i hope everthing gets resolved good luck!

Answer 5

I went through the exact same situation six years ago. My husband decided one day to divorce me without warning and I had just given birth to a beautiful daughter. Guess he had post=partum depression,ha! I thought I would die from the shame and lonliness, I even prayed to die to end the pain. His parents also lived close to us and believe me things will get ugly soon and they will not be on your side. My advice to you is stay as far away from this man as you can while he divorces you---the fact that he can just dump this big problem on you without talking shows he is self-centered and immature. Don't u want someone who loves you and wants to have a long-term family? It sounds like this man is also spoiled by his family. Maybe if the two of you moved far away and started a new life alone together you can make it, but it's a big risk you would be taking. good luck and above all remember life IS beautiful, try to find beauty in something everyday

Answer 6

Sorry. Now, going with the subject, its purely the situation takes a turn.., I view it in a different angles
He is staying in pune & you are someother place., this distance would have created some gap in between you both. So, try and narrow the gap first, then find out what made him to come to this point., then discuss this with your husband, in laws & family members. Create a lovable situation in between your son & husband. You will find the result in your favour. But you must have some amount of patience.
Going to legal may be sewems to be easy, but you have to fight in the open. Do you require this?
hope you will understand this in a matured manner.
In tamil there is a proverb., Ikkaraikku akkarai pachai.
So, Keep Fullest faith on THE ALMIGHTY and go through the
phase of the life, you will come out successfully.
Good Luck to you!

Answer 7

Show him, that Woman is not the thing, which you can get or lose in your life whenever you want.
You should Try, Aadhar kendra in Pune. Which will help you.

The Phone No :
1. Shree Aadhar Kendra -24394104 / 24394103
2. Sakhi - 25448400
Call the up, get an appointment and talk about ur problem. ok?
wish ya the best luck and will pay to the god to bring a smile in ur life again.
bye lady.

Answer 8

my full concern with u i know what is ur situation now, it is too difficult to leave our own world,
i am not that mature that i can give u leagal advice. but i can suggest u one thing.
when ur husband came at home u create a very romantic atmosphere, dress up same when u were on ur marriege day, take some roses & gifts. Tell him cant u remeber any of our single movement which we spend with happieness.
cant u remember our first kiss? first sex? when we have our baby?
ask him clearly that what is ur problem just clearify it and tell me truth, if i am satisfied with ur answer i will be ready to leave u.( although u not).
u just tell him we have our child, think about his future,
suggest him that he will not get anything from that another lady's love, because that person who lives her husband she can leave anyone.
i must wish that ur problem get solved.
have a nice time!
Dont lose hope. because every problem has its end. just think possitive about ur love & be confident. tell him everything with eye contact, if u lose ur faith u will not able to solve ur problem.
Also appoint some lawyer as second option

Answer 9

Don't you have parents or other relatives to discuss this matter? councelling works only when the conserned person wants to come out of a problem safely. Any negative movement against any human being will never bring good solution. So,try to know the reson calmly and patiently, and see whether the so called "reason" can be eliminated

Answer 10

First of all, if u suspect adultary, then u can take recourse to legal remeadies.
However, most of the time things get complex with litigation and separation could be a big pain in the life.
The best option is counselling to help ur husband realise what is good for both of you and your son.

Answer 11

Sneha, if you live in India you must have heard about the womens commission, who fight or consul both adults. In India there are many NGOs that help in these situations, ask around or lok in your local telephone directory. Good Luck.