Can a bad parent get child custody?

Question

My husband and I separated last month. Now he said he wants custody of our 4 yr old son but not our 1 yr old daughter. He has been a horrible parent since they were born. I have to get a lawyer tomorrow but does anyone have any advice on what I should do to make sure I retain custody of both kids? I have been protecting my son from him since he was born and now he wants to take him from me.

Answer 1

The first thing you should use against him is that he only wants custody of your son not your daughter and wants to separate them & dont let them grow up together, this sucks they are simblings and should stay together. Good luck hope everything works out fine for you and your kids

Answer 2

Well my family went through a same situation... where the father was a alcoholic, had a eye witness seen the father throw the child down on the couch b/c she was colicy and he couldnt take it her screaming and she was only a couple months old... we had proof witnessess and police reports. Then after they split he wasnt around them for over a year my husband and i were witnesses to that b/c she would use my phone and i would get on the other line to listen to them and he would always make excuses on why he couldnt get the kids... but for some reason the magistrate who granted the FATHER custody of the kids was b/c my sister didnt have a roof over her head and he did. If you have a stable job and a roof with rooms you will be fine... but you just gotta watch it sometimes b/c when you think things are going your way ... they will pull the rug right out from underneath of you...

Answer 3

Be clear on how you define him as a bad parent. Does he abuse the child, is he a pedophile, a murderer....has he given any indication that he means this child any harm? You have to realize that he is his father and does have entitlements to your son. Never the less I would encourage you to speak with this lawyer. Men do have just as much rights to their children as women. I would advise making a comprise to avoid any messy court battles. Your son will be the one hurt during the battle simply because he's the being litter ally pulled in two different directions. I am sure he loves the both of you and you two as parents should keep this in mind. Do what is in the best interest of your child darling no matter how much bad blood your husband and you may have. Your son deserves the best of both worlds. Maybe family counseling to resolve certain issues that may help you two come to reasonable terms concerning your son? Good luck darling.

Answer 4

Get a good lawyer. Also, write down every time he calls or wants to see the child. What reason would he have to take the child away from you. If you didn't do anything wrong...don't worry. He really cant take them. He is just trying to upset you and he is succeeding. Around him...don't let him see you upset. That is what he wants. Don't give him that. Just smile and act like nothing is wrong. When he starts on you, just tell him. Honey...you will have to talk to my lawyer about that.
You will be fine. But get that lawyer tomorrow.
Good luck. I'll pray for you and your children.

Answer 5

Many states still favor the mother and he will have to prove he is the better parent in order to get custody. My advice is to document everything--every phone conversation, every time he asks to see the kids, evertime he calls the kids, every move he makes.

My ex wanted sole custody of our 4 and 8 year old, alimony and child support from me and filed all kinds of wild accusations. I was able to provide documentation on where he lived, where he worked, how long each phone call to the kids lasted, how many times he saw the kids, what days he said he was "too busy" to see the kids, who he was dating, what he spent on other kids, and what he spent on our kids. I basically buried him in documented proof and he did not have a prayer.

He finally gave up and moved away. I settled on a minimal amount of child support and minimal visits. Good luck--I know it is very stressfull but you can do it!

Answer 6

I don't know what the laws are in your state, but here, the first one who files for temporary custody, gets it until the divorce is over so run don't walk to your lawyers office and file those papers. He will probably get visitation rights however. I don't think either of you can get full custody unless one can prove physical abuse or sexual abuse. Pray for your children and remember: the family that prays together, stays together.

Answer 7

ironically, i was in the same situation and i will tell you that no judge is going to split up your children. he maybe horrible and unfortunately get some custody but he will not just get one child. the judge will look at whats best for the child not the parent. and as someone has already told you here, document everything .. document, document, document. And if you have to hire a private investigator to find out what he does; I know that sounds cheap but that too does help .. help my girlfriend get her twins away fromt there drunken dad... GOOD LUCK!

Answer 8

In most cases the court will give custody to the mother unless the father can PROVE she is unfit. Just by him ONLY wanting the boy should be a red flag to the courts!!!! How did you find this idiot?

Answer 9

getting a good lawyer is the best thing --- and having proof of his bad behavior... be honest and don't argue with your husband - handle things through the legal system....show the judge you are the stable and well adjusted parent... when you are in court - respond only when it's your turn to answer questions and don't say stuff you can't prove.... make sure you are well prepared and have all your proof/witnesses with you for court.

Answer 10

well i wish i could give you some positive out look on this. the only thing i can say proof is in the pudding. if you don't have proof then it is possible that your husband could obtain custody. the best thing i could tell you is from now until the divorce get proof of his wrong doings. good luck.