i have this really bad problem with talking with people...its just like i can't think of anything to say when people talk to me. I try really hard but i can't think of anything to say...i also can't think of anything to say to start a conversation. i'm a really shy person and i just want to be able to talk more...i find it alot easyer to talk to someone on AIM, but i want to be able to talk to someone in person. i find it really annoying that i cant talk to anybody. does anyone know how i can be more social??
2006-10-19 13:00:07 · 9 answers · asked by soccerman001 2 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
It might help if you focus on the other person -- ask them questions about themselves and their day. Too often we focus on ourselves, feeling we have to meet someone's expectations. This gives us a feeling of being under a microscope, and that's uncomfortable for everyone.
Not everyone we meet will like us, but that's okay. We won't like everyone we meet. If we don't talk to others, though, we won't find the ones we do like.
2006-10-19 13:04:16 · answer #1 · answered by Krash 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It could be that what the other person is saying, just is not interesting to you. That is why you can't respond.
As for initiating a conversation; start talking about something of interest to you. Surely, you have some knowledge that you could share with someone. You can certainly get your point across in the question you just asked.
2006-10-19 20:14:15 · answer #2 · answered by scrapper723 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a similar problem, and the way I got over it is I just convinced myself that in 1 month or 2 months or however it takes I will be normally talking to this person, so why shouldn't I start now.
Don't be afraid of saying something and thinking others will think it is stupid or silly. Say what is on your mind and let your character surface for the others to see.
2006-10-19 20:09:03 · answer #3 · answered by v3ks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend, you can get yourself a job in which you have to talk to people. Like working the front dest at...... Teaching something.... Get involved in some sort of social group. You know, like a games group(Bingo, Bridge,etc), a group that has weekily meetings discussing a book, etc. Something. Get out there and throw yourself to the lions. Start acting, singing at kariokee bars, again, anything. Don't question it. Just do it.
2006-10-19 20:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by samaustinashlee_billiewjr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start reading up on social events and keep those in mind when conversing so you can fill silences with "So did you see in the paper that....?" Read other stuff too. It keeps you well rounded, informed and gives you something worth listening to to talk about.
2006-10-19 20:02:58 · answer #5 · answered by JenaMarie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
would you like to share my story? if yes , maybe you can get somthing from it ! in my young age, i'm shy and afraid to do anything in public! i remember on day that my father send me to school at first time. shyness and nervers around me while i saw so many strange people in the classroom. finally, i run away. my father beat me hard. wiht my growing up, i gradually say and doing somthing among the collective. one day , a speech match was hold in our school, my teacher ask us prepare content for next week's speech, i copied a pretty artical and recite it day and day . i was sure that i would do it better , but i fail to speech due to nerverness! my voice and body were trembling ! it was the first time i stood at platform in front of all classmate and teachers!
from that time on, i was working on it and had determination to overcome my weakness. after reading many stroy and article loudly, clearly ,quickly as impossible as i can. i was full of confidence try to catch any chance to talk to my friend and some stranger on the way. now, almost ten years past away since i have graduated from college shool i have got many prizes of all kind of speech competition. my colleagues and friends all thought i have good eloquence and good at communication . that's really! at present , i can cope with different people as different language skills! i feel free in any strange environment!
if you dream it , you can do it! go on ! you can do it ! i believe you!
good luck!!
2006-10-19 21:35:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called Social Anxiety Disorder. You are not alone in this either. Look it up on line, gather information, and go from there. Good luck!!
2006-10-19 20:44:30 · answer #7 · answered by hvjhv 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look you sound like a great guy but i think you just need to relax when your around people and when someone talks then just go with the flow. hope i helped
2006-10-19 20:10:27 · answer #8 · answered by soccersam522 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take a deep breath and just be yourself. ask them where are they from,what do they like,what do they like to do, what do they like to eat, ask them to talk about something. write them a letter or something
2006-10-20 18:35:00 · answer #9 · answered by burtonstanley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋