HI I work at an big ad agency, Im friends with a co-worker who is much older and married with a kid. I have a boyfriend. And people that work here seem to have what appears to be a high scool mentallity... and now are talking behind my back and to other co workers saying we're hooking up! It's such crap how you can't be a good friend with another co-worker and have other poeple think you guys are doing stuff.. So what, we're friends. But now it's getting out of control, my friend works here at the same agency and she is in a different dept. At work parties, people forget that we're friends and gossiping to her about how this "art director" is hooking up with this other co-worker. and when my friend asks who? they say me!!!! ofcourse she defends me in her way, but still Im soooo tired of this crap and it's must liky hurting my rep here, what do I do!!!!! help!
M
2006-10-19 07:53:45 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Try to avoid any behavior that may cause them to think otherwise. Maybe it's the way you talk to him, act around him. Sometimes it isn't obvious when it involves us but we are real quick to identify it when we see others doing it. I'm not saying stop talking to him all together but avoid any unecessary time together. Maybe you need to talk about your boyfriend more or bring up how happy you are in your committed relationship. If people don't know much about you they tend to invent things.
2006-10-19 07:57:05 · answer #1 · answered by shae 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where there's smoke, there is fire. Generally, multiple people aren't going to joke about something unless there's a little something to it. Unfortunately, even if you aren't doing anything with them, people can be childish. I had a guy ask me the exact same question one time at work.
He said "Hey man, my boss is telling me to stop seeing this girl I work with because we are both married to different people, but I am not doing anything with her, what should I do?"
A couple of weeks later, I found out that the two were indeed sleeping with each other unbeknownst to either of their spouses. So, you can understand why I would think this way.
2006-10-19 07:59:19 · answer #2 · answered by Monty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know there is nothing going on, then just do your job and ignore them. Rumors die. However, if it looks as if it can endanger your job then you should let someone who can help know about it; and it would be good if you could find the initiator of the rumor and put them in their place.
I also think its a good idea to step outside yourself and look at the way things are between you and your co-worker. Dont end your friendship, just adjust it appropriately.
2006-10-19 08:22:43 · answer #3 · answered by Carrie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are obviously stepping over the line even if you cannot see it. Cut back on the cutesy flirty stuff and don't hang around with the guy all the time. Even a friendship with another woman can interfere with work if the friendship becomes primary. You are very defensive about this. If you are only "friends" then let some of it go. If more is going on, even if it is in your brain, than let all of it go. Do not screw up this guys life, his wife's or his child's. If you do you are scum.
2006-10-19 08:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by Answergirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to relax a bit. The people you work with must be a bunch of immature boneheads. Your friend must have heard the rumors and assumed that they were true. Does this older co-worker know about it? Does your boss? If not, don't worry about what they say, as long as it doesn't affect your work.
2006-10-19 07:56:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
people will always talk crap. As long as you are living your life in a way that you feel comfortable with, don't worry about it.
However, if it's really hurting your reputation, maybe talk to that friend from the different department and get her take on the situation. Maybe you ARE doing something that is leading people to believe that you're more than friends with this guy without even knowing it. Or maybe it's him.
2006-10-19 08:01:34 · answer #6 · answered by raquel122203 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had that happen to me, the best thing you can do is ignore it, you should feel flattered i mean how boring and meaningless are these peoples lives if they have nothing better to do than watch your every move. Now if you think that this can affect your job talk to a manager or your boss and let them know that nothing is going on so that this wont jeopardize your job.
2006-10-19 08:03:42 · answer #7 · answered by M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should not listen to what other people say because pepople gonna talk regardless. I also think that If they truly wanted to be good co-workers they would stop acting so mature and go up and put their childish ways in the past.
2006-10-19 08:00:17 · answer #8 · answered by Shalla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Laugh with them, walk into work with the just got out of bed look and say, My god, what a night, he kept me up for hours, sorry I'm late, hope the wife don't find out. Then wink. Let him on it too. They'll soon start the gossip to your face, and you'll have the power then to dispel the nasty rumours.
2006-10-19 07:56:38 · answer #9 · answered by flumoxed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are either jealous of the friendship or they are bored and have nothing better to do than talk smack at work. Just ignore them. As long as the two of you know the truth, who cares what anyone else thinks.
2006-10-19 07:56:17 · answer #10 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋