How long after getting divorced does it usually take before you stop thinking about the other person?

Question

I'm 26 years old, and have been divorced for 2 months. I'm still finding myself thinkig about my ex (we were together for 3 years). how long does it usually take to get over stuff like this and do you have any recommendations on what I can do to feel better/get this out of my mind. Note: we don't talk to each other and she was the one that left me b/c i didn't make enough money

Answer 1

Sadly..you will never get over someone who you spent so much time over. Its like a death in the family. It will also be with you, you will always draw memories of the moments but you can't do anything about it so you move on.

I have been divorced twice and everytime my habit is when I get out of a long term relationship is that I look on the good side of things...

Its a new start..Its new freedoms and adventures. Make a list of things you have always wanted to do, travel, physical changes, working out, and so on...start setting goals for yourself and make them happen. When you start crossing items off your list..you will start to feel more vibrant everyday.. that new found confidences will shine thru and the next thing you know...someone better will be attracted to you and respect you ..because you respect yourself.

Physically sit down and hand write out a list...Dont type it...Physically forming the letters on paper will help it stick in your head that these are the things you need to do. It will get into your consciences until you complete them.

Before you know it...Life will be better and it will all be in the past.

Answer 2

If she left you because you didnt make enough money...she was a b#$@%^ sorry...and yes I am a married women...through thick and thin, richer and for poorer...what kind of a woman was she...you are better off without her...stop thinking about her somebody will come along that loves you for who you are not how much money you have. Sure money makes life much easier but its not the everything in life. The pain will get easier over time...find some new friends to forget the usual behaviours and patterns the two of you had. Join a club of some sort meet people with interests much as yours.

Answer 3

Well, the truth is, you'll think about her on and off for the rest of your life. How these thoughts are going to affect you is a different story. It'll be painful for a while... But it will get better as time goes by. The amount of time to "get over" something like this is different for everyone. Just try to focus on different things; find new hobbies, hang out with your friends; avoid the reminders of the past as much as you can. Exercise, meditate, go to church, read good books; whatever rocks your boat. Keep your mind and body occupied, even if it takes effort. These are the things that have helped me in the past in a similar situation.

Answer 4

Typically it takes about 50% as long as the relationship was, to get over someone. So if you were together 3 years, look at it taking about 18 months. But there are so many factors - like who left who and whether there is someone else involved, whether there are kids etc. In your case, give it a little more time. Spend time with friends and pursue hobbies but avoid becoming romantically involved right away as it will be a rebound relationship that will not work long-term.

Answer 5

There is no set "time" the hurt goes away when thinking about a person. My ex-wife left me after being together for 23 years and married for 20 years. We have four children together and it will make it much more difficult to stop thinking about her. It is hard to forget the good times, so, you have to make some new good times with someone new. Hopefully, when my girls are out on their own, my communications with my ex will fade away. You not making enough money, is just an excuse. She married you for richer or poorer, remember? Moving on with someone else will help those feelings for your ex fade away. Good Luck in starting a new life.

Answer 6

It depends, Take some time to think why you are not with her, I guess its good that you don't have to deal with her any more. And sooner the better. Well by the way, how much money you were making that she had to leave you. I want to know how come the wife will leave a husband on less money? Husband must be making very little than or what happened to her job or her money? did now she got her a rich husband?

Answer 7

I've been div for 3-4 years and still think about her. She left me for some of the same reasons. married 20 years. I don't think about her all the time but memories are something you can't stop. A smell or a song will bring her to mind. Your wounds are way to fresh, there is no way NOT to think about her. Give it time things do get better but it takes TIME more for some then others.
GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

Oh, I'm sorry you're hurting.

I would think it's different with each person. If you're still in love with her, then it will take time for you to recover. Don't push yourself.

You need to grieve over the loss, just like a death. Distract yourself as much as you can, but when the pain hits, just go through it. It's all you can do.

Hang in there.

Answer 9

as the years pass it becomes as a fussy memory,you begin to think less and less on it. its much harder on the one left, especially if you were left for unfair unrealistic reasons. but don't let her opinion of you be how you see yourself. somewhere out there is a girl who will just be overjoyed to have someone like you. she wasn't good for you and would have made your life misirable, be thankful you didn't waste 20 more years on this girl , be glad you didn't invest anymore time. you are young and will find the right one. my son recently went through this, he was devistated, but now he is going out with others, and finding things to do. your the lucky one here, how many of us spend many years in a marriage only to find out we wasted that time, and time is something we can never get back.

Answer 10

I have been divorced almost 2 years and i am remarried and i still think about my ex its harder for you cause she left you.Just write down all the things that you loved about her and then let go and move on thats what i had to do therapy helps too.