Married almost 5 years.
He gets sick less.
I am upset that he does not recognize when I do take care of him. It seems like he is seeing the negative. HELP
2006-10-19 06:11:16 · 16 answers · asked by silly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds to me like he is looking for some competetion from you.
2006-10-19 06:12:40 · answer #1 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's the way you take care of him. Some women take care of their man by being kind, loving, appreciative, gentle, playful, and with a sense of love. Other women take care of their man with the attitude of being burdened. They'll do it- if they MUST, but they shouldn't have to. Some women hug their men and rub his back. Other women might do it, but the resentment is clear in their demeanor and attitude. Some women will bring him a cup of soup and give him a sympathetic smile. Other women will plunk down the cup and have an impatient, angry look on their face.
Some women will tuck him in and bring an aspirin. Other women will get pissed off because he's not a frickin child!
Some men get no recognition for all their hard work if they don't bring home flowers, because the man probably didn't load the dishwasher to her specifications!
Some women always see the negative, and in turn train their men to behave the same way.
Some women ignore their men when their men say they want more love (or when he says he feels he's more giving than the woman) and get upset and defensive with their man.
2006-10-19 06:22:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So do you both have a mental list of all the good deeds that you do for each other? Marriage is not about who takes care of each other better, this is not a game to see who get the most points.
Tell him you love him very much and the next time he mentions it, just smile and tell him, that's right honey, your such a good husband. He will be so pleased with himself. Sorry that your having a difficult time with him not recognizing how helpful you are and all the things you do, but some men can not see any further than their noses. Good luck.
2006-10-19 06:17:42 · answer #3 · answered by loser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever stopped to think that maybe you are with the wrong man? When I stopped to think about it I realized that he and I are just not a good fit, never have been, never can be. He likes to criticize and "keep score". My husband ALWAYS sees the negative, wouldn't know positive if it slapped him in the face. Make a choice girl....stay or go...BUT HE WILL NOT CHANGE..I gave mine 5 years now he can spend the rest of his life by himself with his negative thoughts...Good Luck, your going to need it.
2006-10-19 06:57:21 · answer #4 · answered by S*W*F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first of all the man should show the woman love more any way but if you want to show your feelings back then you can cuddle kiss him tell him you love him rub him down love does not always mean what do i buy him next what ever you feel you want to do in your heart then do it and if he is looking for you to take care of him then he needs to work on his self because love happens it isent pland so if he is takeing such good care of you then do to him what he does to you but in your own way this should be a team thing not a one up match
2006-10-19 09:25:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dr. Laura wrote "proper care and feeding of husbands" This book really made a big difference in how loved my husband felt. Give it a try.
2006-10-19 06:15:11 · answer #6 · answered by justcurious 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOur husband is very nit picking and calculative. This shouldn't be mentioned at all. Every relationship is different and who takes care of who more is just typical of each relationship. Why harp on it? BY mentioning it, he reveals how "small" a person he is.
2006-10-20 04:53:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you and hubby need to sit down and have a talk... One that you should have had 5 years ago... Get to know his likes and dislikes, and tell him yours... Maybe that will get you on the right path... If not, you may need more than just a talk, you may need counseling... "Marriage Counseling..."- Try going to church for the counseling... I know at my church, it's free... But before you do anything, try going to Jesus... "He always seems to answer my problems...' Wish ya luck...
2006-10-19 06:48:36 · answer #8 · answered by Dani_n_keem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people you can never satisfy, and your husband may be one of them. no matter what you do you will never satisfy him! Then say to your husband, how can we even this up? since you say you take care of me better? what do I have to do? Tell him that marriage is not about a contest, it is about loving each other, and being their for each other. Say I love you, and I am here for you!
2006-10-19 06:25:53 · answer #9 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should sit down and write down things that you do for him on a regular basis...then plan a day that you dont do any of the...or a week. Tell him ahead that your doing an experiment and then ask for feedback.
2006-10-19 06:14:11 · answer #10 · answered by aarondarling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋