My bf and me dont know what to doabout his twin sis being abused.Hes very girly[I only bring this up because he stays with her] and cant really defend anyone [I dont blame him hes only like 100pnds]and my friend has a problem with this one guy who always comes over and hits her and stuff [hes sexually assaulted her before] .Shes called the police before,but he always ends up dissapearing for a few months before they get him.I tried to get this kid off of her,but nothing I seem to say or do works and he confuses me cause he always says that he likes her and then he'll turn around and say he loves me and dosent understand why I dont love him anymore,and all this other stuff.So I dont know what Im supposed to do.I love my boyfriend soo much and I love his sis,too.we have been through everything for the past 3 years togeather.I just dont know how to handel him [the abuser] anymore.I know I should hate him,but some part of me still loves him.She dosent believe counciling is woking for her.
2006-10-19 05:47:18 · 14 answers · asked by Nicole P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If counselling is not working for her she is seeing the wrong counsellor. Nobody likes counselling, but no-one likes the dentist either - you do it because its necessary. She cant do this alone. Keep working with the police, sooner or later it WILL catch up to him, he will get a conviction and criminal record, and eventually it will become VERY bad for him if he doesnt leave her alone. Also, consider talking to his family about his abusive behaviour - inform his parents. Sometimes they can get through to someone. The worst thing to do is let this guy get away with it, because he will just do it to another woman, and keep abusing. Its so unfortunate that you have to go though this to stop this guy, but in the end its worth it. Also look for organisations that deal with domestic violence, sometimes they have good contacts with police and can help get restraining orders etc. Good luck.
2006-10-19 05:58:02 · answer #1 · answered by shakespear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apply for a Restraining order on this person, no one has the right to hit anyone, your friend has rights as well, no one is expect to live in a environment of Violence and Sexual assault.Sounds like he likes to play mind games and be in control, by telling you that he still loves you etc he is playing of your mind, he is not good, but people can tell how to deal with the situation but only you can make it happen if this is the way you want to go.
If you chose to keep in contact with him , you are justify his behaviour, he would be thinking that it is alright to treat this way, don't have any more contact with him any more, tell him that reason why you are not in love with him anymore , explain that you don't tolerate his behaviour.
2006-10-19 13:01:55 · answer #2 · answered by itsmeiambackagain_333. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to love herself enough to not let someone abuse her and by you worrying about it you're only upsetting yourself. This is because you'll never change her mind because she isn't ready to change. If she and the guy (abuser) really love each other and want to stay together than couple's counseling is what they need. She is going to counseling, but it's not going to work for 'them' unless he's also involved. Maybe the next time this guy starts with his abusive behavior your brother should be the one to call the cops, or you if you're present, but then again, when you're not, what happens? You can only protect this woman so much, but in the long run, she has to protect herself. Good luck with this situation, it's a tough one.
2006-10-19 12:58:10 · answer #3 · answered by Elizabeth S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make the girl get a restraining order against her "boyfriend"... and its really weird that you still have feelings for someone as horrible as him. dont you see what he is capable of? how do you love someone like that? He deserves to be with no one. and if you really need to walk around with a bat and everytime he comes by tell ur boyfriend (current) to smash his head with it. that way he learns.
2006-10-19 12:57:26 · answer #4 · answered by xtropicaldreamz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get this creep out of your lives!!!!! HELP is def needed here....get her into a womens crisis organization. Victims of abuse cannot help themselves, they need friends to show them the right path. Tell that A** to get lost and not show his face again. Keep informing the police. THIS IS NOT OK!! Get help.
2006-10-19 12:53:22 · answer #5 · answered by thisiscrazyinsane 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i get what your saying and she can't do anything about it only call the cops then she really doesn't care what happens I'm sorry to say this but stay out of it OK don't get your self pulled in deeper
2006-10-19 13:02:18 · answer #6 · answered by pumpkin amy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her into a shelter for battered women & get a restraining order for all of you.
2006-10-19 13:03:21 · answer #7 · answered by grrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get her out of that enviornment. move somewhere else and cut all contact with this abuser. How can you love someone that hurts people?
2006-10-19 12:49:56 · answer #8 · answered by Your_Star 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You be stright up with that motherF.U.C.KER tell him that if he keeps messin with her you will kick his a.s.s. abuse like that you don't play with even if he is your friend or not. how would you feel if a molester wouldent leave you alone for 3 years!!!!!!!!!!!!Be stright up. Be assertive.Be angry about it. don't let him do it any more.
2006-10-19 12:58:04 · answer #9 · answered by The REBELution! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to pray and pray with them because he's not gonna stop until someone with authority lets him knows there in charge{God} and you also need to ask God for guidence
2006-10-19 13:01:30 · answer #10 · answered by chan_sweet91 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋