2006-10-19 05:46:34 · 14 answers · asked by alexandra24 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It depends on who you talk to, if you are talking to someone with kids and grandkids, then more than likely they will tell you that you are selfish or missing out on the joys of parenthood. I don't think it's selfish, it is your personal preference not to have kids for your own reasons. Not everyone wants to have children, maybe because they want to travel and enjoy life or they are not parent material. Whatever the reason, if you think it isn't selfish, then that is all that matters. Enjoy your life for you.
2006-10-19 05:49:27 · answer #1 · answered by Truly_Complexed 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't feel that it's selfish if someone chooses not to have children. Everyone is free to live their own life. BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kids are not a burden, that's the selfish part. Kids are a miracle, can you imagine carrying a real live human being in your stomach?? I have two children of my own and they are far from a burden, they are a blessing. Through everything, my children love me. At times I've been strict and can get grouchy but they still look past all of my faults and flaws and love me unconditionally. Kids don't ask to be here so it is very UNselfish of a person not to have kids if they feel that all a child is going to do is burden them. Too many people have children and ruin the childs life but have the nerve to say the child ruined theirs.
2006-10-19 13:03:13 · answer #2 · answered by ladystarrchild107 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think someone who chooses not to have kids is selfish. it is a personal choice and no ones business but the person that makes the choice. kids are a burden and a lot of trouble. and anyone who doesn't think so is delusional...i have three and they are grown. it was my choice and i raised them as best i could and they turned out OK...some good stuff some bad...that's life...if you don't want kids don't let anyone talk you into it. and if at some time you change your mind that's your business too.
2006-10-19 12:52:50 · answer #3 · answered by Cheryl E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably the fact that you say they're a "burden" is what tips it off. Saying you don't like kids, or don't get on well with them, or you don't think the world is a safe place to raise them.... is one thing... but a "burden"..... totally selfish... cause a burden takes responsibility, attention, and effort... and yours if obviously focused on youself. Better that you don't bother. I don't look at my kids as a burden.... only as a challenge, and one thats well worth it.
2006-10-19 12:52:06 · answer #4 · answered by just_me3575 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right kids are a huge burden. They require all of your time and attention. I don't think your selfish at all. But I will tell you this when your child tells you how much he or she loves you and gives you unconditional love like they do the burdens are 100% worth it. Plus it may not matter to you now but someday you may be really lonely!!!!!
2006-10-19 12:51:54 · answer #5 · answered by green eyed lady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are both judgemental and stupid enough to express themselves over it when it comes to personal preference.
Human beings argue over personal issues because of things like jealousy, insecurity, fear... all kinds of nonsence.
Good for you! They are a burden, you're right about that! But one that I am proud to bare. It is not for the squeemish at least you have the intelligence to prevent it being that you don't want it. The same people rattling your cage about it are those that probably made mistakes concerning it that they can't take back. Most parents are accidental and have no choice BUT to say they love it and will impose their view on you for being smart enough not to make the same mistakes they have.
One of my children was a happy accident and the other was planned right down to the due date. I wouldn't have it any other way. although sometimes I wonder what my life would be less their influence. I still know that they bless me every day!
Good for you! strong proud non-momma! That is NOT all women are for in this world!
2006-10-19 12:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't consider it selfish. I don't consider kids a burden either. I love mine but, the worst thing you could do is to have kids you don't want. It's an individual choice. Don't ever be pushed into having kids if you don't want them.
2006-10-19 12:50:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because you have love to share.... If you don't share it, you're selfish...
Children are a burden at times.... Yet they also provide lots of joy, hope, and entertainment... I used to think that children were a royal pain in the butt. Who wants to change smelly diapers? Who wants to get up in the middle of the night when they it's time for feeding? That's for the first two years.
Then my niece and nephew were born. When I opened up and they in turn showed me their innocent love. I was crushed. How could someone love me like that? I then showered them with love and they in turn showered me with even more love.
Sure they'll make you angry at times, but in the end the love you gave is unequaled by the love that is given to you in return.
It's your decision and I believe your loss. Stop being so negative it will creep into other parts of your life... Who needs all that negativity in their life.
2006-10-19 12:56:22 · answer #8 · answered by James B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you answered your own question with your own question. Children are NOT a burden. Saying that they are implies that you would have to do things for them instead of doing things for yourself. That sounds selfish to me.
However, if you choose not to have children for that reason, I commend you. If you are not prepared to sacrifice things for yourself to give to your children, then don't have them. Parents have no right to be selfish because it is their pursuit of pleasure that brought a child into the world in the first place.
2006-10-19 12:50:05 · answer #9 · answered by Shayna 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People with children are trying to justify their own selfish needs.
My girlfriend and I are childfree. So is my cubemate, and a few others that I work with. We get called selfish, etc all the time. By whom? Those whom have children.
Listen to the reasons people with children give to justify themselves. Usually it is stuff like, “Who is going to love you after your friends die off?”, or “Who is going to take care of you when you get old?”. Almost every reason for having children is very selfish. Yes, even more selfish than stuff like, “I’d rather spend the money on vacations”.
My girlfriend and I will spend our money traveling. That is why we are both voluntarily serilized.
2006-10-21 18:52:11 · answer #10 · answered by Marvin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋