In a nut shell, my boyfriend has a history of lying to me. We went to counselling and he promised that he would change. Our relationship grew and got better over time. Now I founded out that he cheated on my 2 weeks ago. Should I forgive him again or should I go my way?
2006-10-19 04:46:14 · 48 answers · asked by Christine H 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
dump him or it will happen again
2006-10-19 04:48:03 · answer #1 · answered by sunbun 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if he has a history of lying to you then maybe you should just go your own ways , he is just a boyfriend , besides it seems that he doesn't really care about you because he lied again when you gave him a chance , you are obviously worth better because even though he cheats he doesn't break up with you so , just give somebody else a chance, there is always something else better around the corner.
2006-10-19 04:51:40 · answer #2 · answered by eliza 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he can lie, so can you. Try "I've just been to the moon," "My mother has been evicted by her landlord and she's coming to live with us," "I found another man's penis in our bed" and "I bought an ostrich yesterday, it's in the shed."
Do you want to be a shared resource or an exclusively locked resource? If you're happy to be shared, tell him so and let him date as he pleases. If you prefer being exclusively locked, then end the relationship or state your terms ("If you cheat once more, I will leave."). There's nothing actually wrong with being shared, but most people don't enjoy it. That's why life isn't like a box of chocolates. Maybe you can tolerate a little sharing, but only so much. ("If you cheat more than once in any two weeks, I will leave.")
If you are happy to be shared, then of course you may treat your boyfriend as a shared resource too. Make a few dates with nice boys and play around.
2006-10-19 04:52:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I had the same problem as you. I forgave him and things went well for a short time and he had done the same thing again, if you did the counseling and he still did the cheating you should go your own way, there is someone out there for you that will not cheat on you. there is someone for everyone, and they are better for you than someone who will not
cheat on you.
2006-10-19 04:52:28 · answer #4 · answered by lionaness813 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he promised to change the first time then broke ur that promise...what makes you think he wont do it again knowing that he has already had a history of lying to you. You know the answer to ur own question...jus trust what you think is right.
2006-10-19 04:59:34 · answer #5 · answered by june 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he isn't trying to work things out as hard as you are. I would definately take this as a big sign that things are not getting better between you.
You do not have to tolerate that kind of disrespect. You are better than that, and you deserve to be treated better than that.
Move on, girl. If he really wanted to step up and be a real man, he would have already.
2006-10-19 04:54:13 · answer #6 · answered by ootxmusicgirloo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if it can be improved once it can be improved again,,have a word with him about whether or not he actually wants to be with you as you dont want someone who doesnt want you,,it gives the option for him to get out and not be a liar about it,,given the option many people find what they thought they wanted isnt actually the case,they were just used to what they had,,i am assuming you dont tie him up to stay with you so he does have a choice,you have to be honest here,,let him know he doesnt need to stay and you only want him to want to stay ,,you wont force him to,let him know if he wants to walk,,he can,,you will be hurt yes,,but rather that than be cheated on,,,you deserve more respect than that,,stand up for yourself and say what you consider the truth,,you may or may not love him but if you do have something you want to say,,,say it,,you are only at the minute one half of a couple,,no more,no less,,have your say as he does,,give him an out and you may just find he doesnt want it....sometimes we all get used to what we have and need a little reminder of how good it can be together,,be open,be honest and above all,,be yourself,if it does all end in tears at least you will know it wasnt because of something you did or didnt do.
2006-10-19 04:56:26 · answer #7 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Christine, you know what to do. Lay your emotions aside and kick him to the curb. You don't need that drama. It has happened to me and I was stupid. Don't be like me. Be strong. You will find a new guy that deserves you much more than a lying, cheating dog. Good luck.
2006-10-19 04:52:09 · answer #8 · answered by DMBthatsme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's see BOYFRIEND-COUNSELING-CHEATING...Baby girl you are the only one working on this relationship. Stop allowing him to take up your time,life is too short.If he lies, are you sure about a word he has told you? When in doubt get out.Good Luck, go find you a MANfriend....start this week-end
2006-10-19 04:58:14 · answer #9 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You only have two choices sweetie. Either you are going to have to learn to deal with this type of BS from him or dump him. He will not change. Not matter how hard you try. I am sorry I know it is going to hurt one way or the other but honestly for your health you need to get rid of him.
2006-10-19 04:51:10 · answer #10 · answered by Jax 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not only did he cheat, he lied. If therapy didn't help he is obviously a selfish liar and will not change. Get out now and count your blessings. If you stay with him, whether or not you have a few good times, you will regret it!
2006-10-19 04:51:13 · answer #11 · answered by grudgrime 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋