ive recently broken up with my fiancee, after now a month of living at home, ive done nothin but think about him and cry myself to sleep lately, we have a HUGE history with eachother that we've devloped in the last 11 months. ive read that hes kinda intersted in another girl, this is about the same time telling him that i wan to be with him again. now im scared that he wont accept me and go with the other girl and ill be heart broken again. ive told myself if this relatioship doesnt work im not dating again until im in my mid to late 20's, (im almost 20 now)
am i just a maganet for pain? or am i just not the person to be dating?
2006-10-18 16:10:39 · 12 answers · asked by rugbrat86 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If he doesnt accept you then you dont want him anyway. It will hurt for a while, but youll surely find an even better guy. You dont want to be with someone who doesnt want to be with you. you said he was your fiancee, maybe he thinks the grass may be greener? wanting to date around before taking the plunge? or did you break up with him? If you broke up with him, then he may very well go for this other girl. He may have been hurt by you leaving him and afraid to get back together in case it happened again. Men wont admit it, but they dont like rejection either and they do get hurt. Your still really young, so if it doesnt work out, you will probably not put off dating again til mid to late 20's. Just dont look for it and concentrate on yourself. A lot of the time, you will find that special someone when you are not looking for him.
and i doubt your a magnet for pain. Everyone thinks that. Ive felt before like i shoudl just forget about men altogether and live alone for the rest of my life. I get over it though. And it will get easier for you. Just concentrate on yourself and making yourself happy and the rest will follow.
2006-10-18 16:17:52 · answer #1 · answered by Autumn M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think you just had him around enough and now him being gone is not what you are used to,, Listen to your Heart AND your mind, You know whats the right decision, make sure you do whats RIGHT for YOU,, So many times we all want what we cant have or we want back what we had, and why, Because its EASY and its what we know and are accustomed to, I am 46 yo male and I have been single the last 9 yrs, I hate it but, - " I'd rather be alone for the right reasons, than with someone for the wrong reasons " and also,, if he is seeing someone else or interested in someone else,, then that shows he made a choice,, So why do you want to be with someone who doesnt want to be with you,, You cant make someone Love you, you can only show them what you have to offer or how you feel,, Dont worry yourself sick about it,, believe me,, Most guys arent worth the anguish women put themself thru, Guys cheat, lie, and or treat women like a possession or a slave and seem to have a hard time treating a woman as an EQUAL, Women need to be treated with Respect, honesty, and as a Best Friend,,, And dont try looking so hard for your new man,, You will never find him if your looking,, Relax,, go to church get involved in organizations, start going to the gym and make him regret it, or occupy your time somehow, then someday soon, he will be right where you least expect,,, Good Luck,, and btw - Move on, He made his choice,, You cant be hurt by someone UNLESS you Let them hurt you,
Women - Gotta Love'em
I do
2006-10-18 23:39:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you guys have proven to yourselves that you are not ready to marry yet. If you go back with him... please wait a few years to get engaged again!!! You're 19 with a whole life ahead of you. Date a bunch of people and have a blast growing up. Im not saying have sex with every guy out there... but simply date around. Don't settle into another relationship for a while... just date guys and hang out with your girl friends. Enjoy life as a single woman while you still can... don't become another divorce statistic because you wanted to rush into marriage.
2006-10-18 23:15:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you made the right decision by cutting him loose. If you were happy you would have never walked away. However, you didn't plan on the void after he left. You gotta tough it out until you find someone else to fill that void. Going back to him is just going to make you miserable and possibly prevent you from meeting somebody perfect for you. Also, its really cruel to him if you don't love him, because you are just going to break his heart again.
2006-10-18 23:16:47 · answer #4 · answered by I like Chinese food 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One, you have many years ahead of you to get married. You called off your engagement for a reason, your gut feeling, woman's intuition, etc. Believe in both of these things because us women have these powers.
If you were meant to be together you will be together. This is my personal opinion, but if he was ready to marry you, then it would be strange for him to be interested in another female already after only 4 weeks. Although, guys are different, they don't tend to sit around and mope-the best thing to do to forget someone is to get interested in someone/something else to keep you busy.
You are too young to hang up dating. Have fun, go out and enjoy hanging with your friends. Don't let him think that you are sitting around regreting your decision. If he wants you back, fine, but if he doesn't don't let him see you sweat!
I feel for you and good luck.
2006-10-18 23:18:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you're going through now is perfectly normal. You're getting over a broken heart. Everybody goes through it at least once. Give yourself time to heal. And if he does start dating someone else it will be hard to deal with, but eventually you will get over it and you'll be stronger and wiser because of this experience. You were too young to be engaged anyway. Enjoy your life girl! :)
2006-10-18 23:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by MsT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I just went through what you are. I wasn't engaged, but we dated 2 yrs. Just recently I called him and told him I wanted him back. I was shaking like crazy. he didn't quite give me an answer. It took me 2 weeks to call him. I still don't know what'll happen. I wish you good luck if he's the one that's meant to be. Maybe he isn't. I'm still stuck with my thought. It aint easy being a woman in are age group. :-(
2006-10-18 23:19:45 · answer #7 · answered by Artsy 1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some relationships are not meant to be no matter how hard you try, some people you are not compatable with.
But there is not need to punish yourself & restrict yourself from meeting other people. Think about yourself and put yourself first, don't let a past relationship let you down, there are more better & bigger things out there.
Have a big change, go out with your girlfriends, club it up & let go.
2006-10-18 23:18:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are so young! Although you won't know it for 15 more years! There are so many other choices out there... if you think he's interested in someone else.. look away... find something else to make positive energy. Once he thinks you are over him... he will probably come running. An easy target is not challenging.
2006-10-18 23:15:45 · answer #9 · answered by dena_lisa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHy did u two break up in the first place? Maybe he doesnt feel 4 u like he used to...have u talked to him?? You have to find out how he feels...
2006-10-18 23:39:49 · answer #10 · answered by Mr. Long 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋