What are the chances of her friend getting the baby?

Question

My friend decided that if anything ever happened to her she wanted me to be the caretaker of her little boy. The child does have a father and child does have the father's last name. He is a deadbeat though. She wants to leave him with someone who loves him and will take good care of him, she says. Not him. I told her the chances are not good. He would fight tooth and nail for the baby because it would provide him with income. So is there anything she could do? Or would the father automatically have custody if something happened to her? (hope it never does)

OK it sounds like everyone thinks I'm judgemental. I have known these people all my life. He is in and out of jail always, spends every bit of the money he steals form his mother on drugs, and is unemployed does this sound like a deadbeat? I'm not high and mighty, just not a pill head. THANKS.

She does not feel he should lose all rights. She wants him to have visitation, just not be responsible for child at all times, because she does not trust him.

Answer 1

I understand completely what your friend is going through.It was my biggest fear also when my son was growing up.I had my parents listed as a caretaker if something happened to me.Due to many factors,my sons father was not who I would want raising him.I do think however,that if something would have happened to me,he probably would have gotten custody,even though he was unfit.It is sad that the courts sometimes side with blood than in the best interest of the child.The only thing I can say is that just know that something happening to her is probably pretty unlikely.If it would you should fight for what your friends wishes are,the courts might realize he isn't the person to raise this child.

Answer 2

The biological father does have legal rights to his child, regardless. The only way you could get custody upon your friends death is; one the father would have to waive his rights and two the biological mother would have to grant custody to you.
Both must be in writing. The fathers rights would have to go through the courts and your friend should have a Will made expressing her wishes. In a court battle for custody you vs the biological father, you lose. (The childs age is a factor.)

Answer 3

Regardless of her, or your feelings toward the father, HE would have rights OVER you should anything happen to the mother of the child in question. Also, the mother needs to make it clear in her will what she would like to have happen in the event of her demise, however, the courts are likely to over ride this in favor of the father unless he is deemed an unfit parent by the courts. This is a sticky situation and frankly, I would NOT get involved.

Answer 4

If she felt strongly about him not having his rights as a father, she may be able to take him to court and declare him an unfit parent. Or she could find another way to relinquish his rights. However, this may be unlikely, he may change and shouldn't lose his rights.

Answer 5

The father has a fundamental human right to father his child - regardless of what your moralistic judgement is - and how do you know you're not a dead-beat (sounds like you are a selfrighteous one to boot!)