Why does my husband never want to go out anywhere with me.....?

Question

....b/c he's supposedly so tired from work, but recently he somehow finds the energy to hang out w/his guy friends for 2-3 hours almost every night after dinner?

NOT gay, NO other women - I'm positive. And they don't go to clubs, bars, or anything like that -- just hang out.

He meets one of the guys (I'll call him Jim) for lunch at least a few times on weekdays, they talk on the phone briefly every day, & they even get together on the weekends.

E.g: On Thur., we made plans to go to lunch on Sat. (w/o Jim), then on Fri., he says he's meeting Jim for lunch. Sat. rolls around & he invites me to lunch w/them. Jim calls just before we meet up & my husband says, "Oh, my wife's gonna come w/us to lunch." It was as if we'd never made plans to go to lunch.

Again, NOT gay, NO other women. I feel avoided & unimportant. We used to do interesting things together - his ideas too. Now he won't make an effort to do things w/me; we just sit around the house.

What's going on???

I do go out with my own friends, but occasionally I'd like just us to go out. Actually, it would be nice for him to be motivated enough to go out somewhere w/me. Now, it's like his friends get the best of him and I get the rest.

Answer 1

Start doing your own thing!!!! Do not wait to have fun!!!!!!

Answer 2

Well, if you are certain he is not gay and there is no other women then Great. The only other thing I can think of is I don't know how long you two have been married but maybe hanging out with one of the guys somehow gives him part of his youth back like re-living the younger days. That no responsibility just hanging with the boys kind of thing. Or if this friend of his is single maybe they are just enjoying flirting or being picked up on by other women (not cheating) but just enjoying that he is still saught after by the opposite sex. So maybe there are some reasons behind his actions if you really sit and think about it maybe he has self esteem issues for some reason or another.

Answer 3

I wish that my wife was like you, because she does not like to go out with me. I am a people person, and she does not like hanging out with people.
My wife tells me that I never take her anywhere, but when I ask her it is either too late, I am not in the mood, too tired, someone is going to be on CNN or FOX news, or something to these type of excuses.
Myself I have no time schedule for anything except work. I am ready for sex in the morning, noon or evening it does not matter, and if there is a television show on, I will say turn the VCR on. When I am in the mood I just say hey lets do it. This is my honest answer.

Answer 4

He is tired of you but he still loves you. He wants new excitement in his life. my husband was like that. He changed after my third child and now he can't get enough of me. You might have to threaten him that you are leaving him and see what he will say. I f say nothing . Then move out for about a week and see if he miss you and if he doesn't . Then that what he wanted . He wanted you to make the first move to call it quit. He probably don';t want to look like a bad guy.

Answer 5

It's not your fault. He's just taking you for granted, it sounds like. You aren't really alone; my husband eats dinner with me, and then disappears for the rest of the evening. He spends absolutely no time with me on the weekends either.

Answer 6

I really don t know the answer. My husband is exactly the same. We sometimes go out but it s always where he wants to go. I feel unimportant too!!

Answer 7

sounds to me like ur husband is tired of doing things with you and feel his marriage has gotten in the way of his homies so he decided to start hanging with them. but beleive me he'll get tired of it and then you'll start doing things together again.

Answer 8

Why not go along with him to wherever he goes?