We have been dating for 4 years. I am going to turn 18 next month. I really love this guy and i REALLY want to spend the rest of my life with him.
2006-10-18 12:02:27 · 12 answers · asked by ~GodsGuRl~ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you have been with the same guy for four years, I don't understand why your parents don't realize how much you want to be with him.
If you have not thought of an engagement period, maybe that should be your next move.
2006-10-18 12:19:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can't convince them. You can't make anyone do anything. You have been together a long time but I can imagine that if I were in the situation my parents, while they would understand how much I love him and how great we are together, would also advise me against getting married now, because of my age. Now I'm 21, and I'm sure if I had been in your situation I would have told myself the same thing. I am in a 5 1/2-year relationship and we ARE engaged, but not getting married for another 1 1/2-3 years. I don't think marriage should be rushed, even if you already know who you're going to spend the rest of your life with. It's a big change and it takes a lot of money, and planning, and a certain stability that no 18-year-old can have unless they graduated high school early and have been in the working world for years, and are independent financially and live away from their parents...I mean, what's the point in shocking yourself with ALL of that at once? Will you go to the same college? If so, is that really the right thing for you both? Not every couple needs the same type of education. If you go to the college of your choice, do you want to be long-distancing at the beginning of your marriage? Just stuff to think about. They will be far more accepting as you get through college and establish yourself as an independent individual and they see your relationship outside of high school. Just don't worry! I KNOW how wonderful it is to have our parents approve of your relationship, believe me! But you can't force it! You just have to let it happen, and it will. And ultimately it is NOT their decision who you marry anyway so once you're independent, do what you want to do.
2006-10-18 12:14:41 · answer #2 · answered by ixi26c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you about me. I got married at 18 (we were together for a little over 4 years like you) and it was a fight with my parents to get married. My husband is in the Army and we had short time to get married before his next duty station, but we got married anyway (knowing some family wasn't happy about it). I wouldn't change things at all. I am so happy being married and I am now 19. The family has calmed down and my family is so proud of my hubby because he is now ending a 1 year tour to Iraq.
You need to do what maked you happy. In the end you will be happy you did it because if you don't do what makes you happy you will regret it. If you guys love eachother then get married and don't worry what people think it's your life. I told my mom if I screw up and it's not what I wanted then it was a learning experience for me, but my husband and I love eachother more than anything and we are planning to start a family when he is home from Iraq.
I hope this helps and let me know what happens!
2006-10-19 00:19:09 · answer #3 · answered by Ashley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not, your parents were 18 once. They probably know you feel like you want to be with this guy forever, however, you are very young. You have a lot of life to live yet. You know you want to be together forever then be together, but don't get married until after you both go to college and experience life outside of high school. Rushing out to get married now, doesn't mean you'll be together forever either. It's a big world out there, and by committing yourself to marriage now, that means you'll probably want kids right away too. That probably scares your parents to death.
Slow down, take time to grow up a little bit and if the two of you are still together after college, I bet your parents will be ecstatic you're getting married. They may even pay for the wedding.
Yes, you'll be 18 soon and technically, could just run out and get married, but how will you two support yourselves. If the answer is live with one of your parents houses, then you're definitely not ready to get married.
2006-10-18 12:33:45 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you 2 are really in love, then why the rush? Go to college, get a good education and if he's still in the picture when you finish, then go for it. There's nothing wrong with being in love and wanting to marry someone, don't get me wrong. Just think alot about your future together......you both wait and get a good education, get good jobs/careers, then get married. Or jump into it and possibly end up working in a dead end, low paying job having money troubles which in turn cause marital problems......All I am saying is think about the kind of future you want together. I assume that you 2 will want children also. Think about the kind of life you want your children to have. Think with your head and not your heart on this one. If the love is already there then a few more years of waiting won't matter. Good luck hon and congrats on already being together 4 years at such a young age.
2006-10-18 12:19:16 · answer #5 · answered by Crystal 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Then wait until you are 18. But, and this is a BIG but. Why not wait until you are in your 20's to marry? If both of you really do love each other then the love will still be there when you are older and more mature, right?
I married at 18, and 10 years later I was divorced. Please take it from someone who has walked in your shoes, s l o w d o w n! Enjoy these years as a single girl....you will never get them back later.
2006-10-18 12:07:47 · answer #6 · answered by littleflower_57 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Legally an adult but still have quite the adolesent mind. 18 is young and you will be depriving yourself of your best years. It can work but the odds are against you, one of these days you are going to realize your parents know more than you give them credit for. If you two were truly meant to be together then whats the harm in waiting for a while? I too married young and are now divorced, slow down and dont rush in.
2006-10-18 12:09:17 · answer #7 · answered by teenypurplebinky 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you're over the age of 18, do what you like. supply up dwelling the existence that your mom and pa choose for for you. They of direction do now not take care of your happiness and ought to lots quite you marry a horse than a Punjabi. there isn't any ingredient in settling for something much less then love mutually because it includes marriage. you would be unhappy for a whole life in case you do now not pay attention on your coronary heart and make optimistic to try against for love. grant it on your determine's interest as in the present day as greater suitable. in the event that they proceed to disagree, then enable them to appreciate that that's time so which you will head on.
2016-11-23 18:29:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why spend the time convincing them, it is hard to convince them. If you know that you are in love with him and want to spend the rest of your life with him then you should do that. Just tell your parents that. They will understand if you just tell them that. just don't rush into anything that you aren't sure about.
2006-10-18 12:47:51 · answer #9 · answered by princess_anne_2009 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh boy... if I could go back to when I was 18, the last thing on my mind would be marriage.
Being married isn't the most FUN thing in the world !!
Travel the world for 4 months, and if you still want to marry this guy... go for it !!!
2006-10-18 12:11:07 · answer #10 · answered by Katie A 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋