Too Quick??

Question

In my opinion I do not last long enough in the bedroom. Im 22 and so is my girlfriend we have been going out for 17 months now and have a very active sex life. However I don’t think I perform well enough. My girlfriend has orgasms most times but always through foreplay and never sex because I have finished before she gets there. She says it doesn’t bother her and that I pleasure her and I believe her but im scared it will annoy her in the future if it carries on. Is there anything I can do or am I just over reacting??

Answer 1

First, forgive me a chuckle...you sound so sweet. You are still young and virile. You just need to learn your body a bit more.

I asked some male pals (we are all much older than you) and they welcomed a chance to relive those days. General consensus on an answer was to take time to include yourself a bit more in the foreplay and learn your body's signals that tell you when you are at the height of your ecstasy. Try to learn to control the intensity of pleasure at these times...make it last longer. One friend said he thinks it's great that you and your partner are so relaxed and secure with each other that her touch brings you to optimal pleasure so quickly. A suggestion was to have a fun night out and stop by an adult store (not the shoddy ones that have video booths and drunks around--the NICE ones) and look at the various "toys" they carry that can help you last longer. The people who work in the nice stores are discreet and can advise you on what works well (they do get feedback from customers). Then you can go home and enjoy each other.

The thing is, don't worry about it. Stress isn't good for the action. When you learn to listen to your own body, not only will you learn to "last longer" but the intensity of pleasure will also increase...for both of you.

Good luck and blessings to you and your girlfriend. She sounds like a true treasure and loves you for who YOU are deep inside no matter what.

Answer 2

Sort yourself out an hour before having sex. Then you should be able to last longer. You can get 'certain types' of rings to help with that too.
Loads of women get their satisfaction from foreplay, dont worry about that. You can give her an orgasm during sex by finding the g spot, which is about 3 inches in at the top. (just look it up on the www)
But if shes happy already, you are the one who's got to stop anticipating problems, because by doing that you might actually create one.
'Sex is as much between the ears as it is between the legs'.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

Hey Happy...dude you are only 22 and have a long "sex life" ahead of you! It is nice to see that you and your gal are at least open about it, thats much better than most guys! I don't know if I can give you the best advice since I am old enough to be your Mom but I always heard if you try thinking about something else or counting it might do the trick....but remember also you will get better with age! Good luck to you both!

Answer 5

I wonder what you mean by "foreplay?" I have only had an orgasm twice with my husband actually inside me. Yet, I have several orgasms, include one huge one, every time we have sex. He usually does me first and then he climaxes inside me. I think you ARE overreacting but really if you are this uptight about it, talk to her. I think it's great if it works for you both. I realize there is a certain amount of trust involved in believing her when she says it's OK, but if she's good with it, then you should be, too. I like the way my husband and I "do it," and so does he. I never knew sex could be so good!

Answer 6

Just make sure she is satisfied before you are. Women are not like us. Many of them actually get as much or more enjoyment out of the foreplay than the actual sex act itself. And just remember, it is not a performance. It's called love and love only wants whats best for the other.

Answer 7

Most men can only make a female orgasm thro foreplay!!! It is very rare that a man with make you orgasm thro having sex, so do not worry.......... it took me 8 years and 4 partners in those years to find the man i am with now. . . . . . . . . and ohh yes he can make me orgasm tho sex and it is nice don't get me wrong being able to c*m together but do not cut yourself up about it!!! Good Luck and enjoy practicing x x x

Answer 8

How long are talking about here? First, most women can't orgasm from intercourse alone. Second average is 10-20 minutes, so if you last that long then you are overreacting. Try spankin one out a couple hours before and see if you last longer.

Answer 9

that is so sweet of you to be thoughtful of her. if she says she likes the way you do it just keep doing what you doing, and once in a while thow in a suprise. it just depends on the girl, some like it quick and easy, some like it slow and sweet! It's all aobut foreplay for me, you get me all excited and then bam! hit me with it and i'll never get tired of you. since you already know that you get off easily then make sure you please her first, unless you still got the energy after your first blow to give her some pleasure. hey and it goes both ways... maybe she's thinkin up a storm too....

Answer 10

i like it quick - shows that you're turning him on! (well so i like to think)

i am like your gf and only orgasm through foreplay - really you should believe her when she says that's fine.

an orgasm isn't the be all- end all of sex for most girls, don't get me wrong we like to orgasm but it doesn't need to be during the intercourse. and as long as you carry on paying her some attention once you've 'finished' i'm sure she'll be happy with your performance.